Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Britney’s New Candie’s Commercial

Here's a sneak preview at Britney Muh Bitch Of A Pussy Keeps Fallin' Out Spears' new Candie's ad.  Every time I see Candie's, I think of Daisy Duke-not the shorts, the chick from Dukes of Hazzard.  Which makes me think of Jessica Simpson.  Which makes me think of Chicken of the Sea tuna.  Which makes me think of Brit. It's an amazing universe. [gallery]...

Bridget Moynahan Not Happy About Gisele’s Comments Regarding “It”

16149735bridgetmoynahan41200994736am-1 Bridget Moynahan is pissed about Gisele Bundchen's "The Boy Is Mine," statement in May's Vanity Fair.  She's not letting on though; she's letting her friends do all the talking. One of her close friends, who you know was totally reading off index cards that Bridget wrote out for her, said, "If Gisele loved Bridget's child like he was '100 percent her own,' then she would not talk about him in the press. Discretion and respect are not either of Gisele or Tom's virtues, as was evidenced even...

Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer Would Have Been So Much More Into You If Only You Had Gonads

If there are two people on this planet that I'd like to talk about less than Perez Hilton and John Mayer, I don't know who they are. However, this must be discussed. Last year, my least favorite non- blogger made the media rounds, letting everyone know that in December, 2006 he (allegedly!) made out with John Mayer. Tongue kissing-five minutes-Perez and John Mayer while Jessica Simpson rubbed Mayer's crotch. I'm no fan of Perez but I totally believed this story based on the level of deta...

Stiffed By The Queen

57080679queenlatifah331200922548pm-1 Queen Latifah had a birthday bash this past weekend at SIR Studios in Hollywood.  Attendees included Kim Kardashian, Lil' Kim and Vivica Fox-all of whom brought their twins, or you know, massive chests.  Let's hope Queen's friends gave her money as a gift; it sounds like she's going to need it. Latifah's cosmetologist and stylist are both suing her for unpaid salary for work they did for the Cover Girl campaign as well as Queen's own Curvations intimate apparel line.  The lawsuits total $...

These Boots Were Made For Talking…About.

meganfoxboots-1 I know Beet will beat me, but I must be true to myself.  I don't get all the Lindsay Lohan footwear love.  I just do not.  It seems like she just has forty pairs of the same black leather boots to match her seventy-eight pairs of black leggings and her six John DeLorean tribute collector's edition coke spoons. However, Megan Fox was seen yesterday in curly hair (love!) and boots so substantially more fuckable than anything I have ever seen on Lindsay Lohan's unevenly suntanned person. How ...

The Newest Must-Have: A Kendra Wilkinson Stripper Pole

56949500kendrawilkinson331200912244pm-1 Little dogs and twins are so passé.  It's all about the stripper pole, bitches!  And, of course, Kendra Wilkinson has her finger on the pulse of today's trends: I'm coming out with my own stripper pole.[sic] Stripper pole, and stripper pole workout," The Girls Next Door star, 23, told Usmagazine.com at the American Red Cross Red Tie Affair in Santa Monica Saturday. "It's like Carmen Electra's, but mine is better," she continued. "Mine will connect to the ceiling, and you can spin on it and...

I’m Just Going To Get A Jump On The “Brad And Angie Split!” Story

16593936bradpittangelinajolie3312009124502pm-1 It's Tuesday, it's sunny outside and I'm feeling productive.  So in the spirit of efficiency, I'm just going to get started on these newest stories about trouble in Brangelinadise.  Today's tale?  The couple haven't been photographed together in twenty-one days and Brad's a drunk. Daily Mail, the people who truly can fashion a feature story out of the tiniest shred of information, tells the story of Angelina's dismay about Brad's drinking and slovenly ways.  The summary:  Angelina ca...

Dis-counted!

56707207luanndelesseps3312009102212am-1 There are few shows that I watch with as much loyalty as Bravo's Real Housewives of New York City.  I haven't seen such a concentrated group of bitches in one place since the cafeteria in high school.  Or since the last mom's group I tried to tolerate being a member of. If you've been watching this season, you know that Luann, excuse me-Countess Luann de Lesseps, has been diligent in plugging her new book, Class With The Countess.  This American Indian who grew up in Connecticut is a co...

Drew Barrymore And Justin Long Reunited!

15373925drewbarrymore3312009105450am-1 Reunited for a movie, that is.  Though I still maintain that they are hitting the sheets again, as well.  And I believe that Justin really loves Drew; he stuck with her through all those orange-faced Cover Girl ads. The He's Just Not That Into You co-stars are teaming up yet again for another collaboration.  Their new movie, Going The Distance, is about a couple engaged in a long-distance relationship and the trials they face. HJNTIY made $145M so Barrymore and Long have basically accomp...

Is This Britney Spears’ Voice?

I don't know guys.  This voicemail is reportedly Our Lady Of Cheese Grits leaving a voicemail for an attorney that was assisting in having her dad's conservatorship dissolved.  Do you think this is actually Brit?  Because I've never heard a sentence spoken by her that didn't include the word "y'all," I'm very unsure.  Thoughts? Here's the transcript, in case the audio, uh, disappears: Hi my name’s Britney Spears. I called you earlier. I’m calling again because I just wanted to mak...

Quotables

gisele-1 "I want him to have a great relationship with his mom, because that’s important, but I love him the same way as if he were mine. I already feel like he’s my son, from the first day.  He’s a little angel – the sweetest, most cuddly, loving baby. I feel blessed to have him in my life." Gisele Bundchen, wife of Tom Brady and apparently also mother of his son, in Vanity Fair's May, 2009 issue. Note to GB:  Unless you've got some stretchmarks to share, you've pushed a human head o...
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