Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Focus on the War Itself, Troops, Not the Effects of Biological Warfare

photo of paris hilton appearing at the uso event in new york city Read: Parasite Hilton. She was supposedly asked to appear at this week's USO event in New York City, "Swinging Salute to Our Troops," but she only showed up because she thought the event was "Swingers in Support of Troops." Mistake, anyone can make it, really, but she's single now so all options are wide, wide open. So ... since she was already there, she decided to suck it up (no pun intended) and make the best of it, while hamming it up for cameras (real ones and imaginary ones, too, o...

Bristol Palin Has Got, Like, Bills to Pay

photo of bristol palin's photo shoot for harper's bazaar The teenage-mom-ed Palin sits down with Harper's Bazaar for their June issue and covers pretty much every topic from being a teenage mom, working full-time to support her two-person family and why, in fact, her two-person family isn't a three-person family. On Playgirl posing Levi Johnston and dating other guys: "I just ignore it. He is a stranger to me," she says, visibly rattled by the mention of Johnston's name, though she refrains from saying more. "I don't want to get into it. It's just dirt...

Lindsay Lohan + Chanel Stickers = Total Class and Stuff

photo of lindsay lohan's twitter page And she implores Chanel's marketing department (through Twitter!) to hook a sister up with some high-class Chanel stickers so she can decorate her SCRAM bracelet. Stickers. Really. So classy, Linds. So, unbelievably classy. First of all, how would you even want to go out clubbing wearing that damned thing? Embarrassing much? I mean, you know, shit happens and people all over the fucking world get in trouble for drug and alcohol-related infractions and a lot have to own up to their bad...

Zelda Lily is Hiring!

We’re looking to amp the site up with some additional content and are seeking your expert input on topics that affect women everywhere these days, from laughable tampon commercials to heated courtroom battles over same-sex civil rights. Zelda Lily is currently hiring TWO UNPAID INTERNS. Both positions are part-time and are responsible for posting 4-5 pieces a week to the site. Both male and female writers are encouraged to apply. To apply, send an email to sarah@zeldalily.com with “ZL Intern Application” in the subject line. Please include a cover letter, links to your original blog (if you don’t have one, now would be a good time to start!), and 3-4 writing samples if you don’t currently run a blog of your own. If you think you’d be a good contributor to Zelda Lily and you’d like to get experience writing for a larger audience, please consider applying for the available positions and check us out over there while you're at it. Again, please send your applications to sarah@zeldalily.com by no later than Tuesday, June 1st at 11:59 PM ET. Looking forward to hearing from you! />We’re looking to amp the site up with some additional content and are seeking your expert input on topics that affect women everywhere these days, from laughable tampon commercials to heated courtroom battles over same-sex civil rights. Zelda Lily is currently hiring TWO UNPAID INTERNS. Both positions are part-time and are responsible for posting 4-5 pieces a week to the site. Both male and female writers are encouraged to apply. To apply, send an email to sarah@zeldalily.com with “ZL Inte...

Justin Bieber Not Only Has a Really Unfortunate Haircut, He Also Appears to Be a Quite the Bitch, Too

photo of justin bieber in white shirt performing music While touring Sydney, Australia, Justin Bieber stopped to do a quick, on-the-fly interview for an early morning show called Sunrise, and based on what some say, didn't take too well to the foreign hospitality. Eyewitnesses state that Bieber told a floor manager who took his arm or touched his back or something to guide him to where he needed to go, "Don't ever fucking touch me again." Koch, who is co-host for Sunrise spoke to radio station Mix FM and admitted that the Bieb is a pretty big baby...

Mariah Carey Lends More Credence to the Pregnancy Rumors

photo of mariah carey and husband, nick cannon Girl pulled out of rehearsals for a movie she was slated to perform in, For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf. While that, in itself, isn't enough to confirm that Carey's carrying the spawn of Nick Cannon, recent rumors regarding her weight gain and "fertility treatments" add to the fervor surrounding the idea that there could be a really hot-looking baby strutting its stuff in a few months. Or so. Carey was said to withdraw from the production late yesterd...

Fitty Cent Loses “Fitty” Pounds

photo of 50 cent after massive weight loss for new movie No, ladies and gentlemen, your eyes are not deceiving you. This is not a photo of Dave Chappelle under age-progression photography. It's a photo of "serious actor," 50 Cent, who will probably want to drop that whole numbered-name thing if his acting career does go off and go by his real name: Curtis Jackson. File that away in the old memory banks, because he's aiming to become a big-time A-list actor. And you know what? I've made fun of him in the past, because I'm just not a big rap fa...

American Idol Finale: So, What Did You Think?

photo of american idols lee dewyze crystal bowersox and ryan seacrest on stage I thought last night's show was all sorts of giddy, clappin'-hands amazing. From Siobhan Magnus performing with the Bee Gees, to fucking Bret Michaels appearing to sing "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" with Casey James to Joe Cocker's "With a Little Help From My Friends." And yes, I am so excited about these three performances (among many, many others), that I'm going to share them with you. Like, right here. Now. Yeah, that was awesome. I mean, aside from the whole Siobhan Magnus part...

Lindsay Lohan Goes Back to Blonde

I wonder if it's the equivalent of Amy Winehouse going back to black or Britney Spears going back to, uh, pink. The newly-free, almost-jailbird Lindsay Lohan has lightened her once-black tresses to a light, sunny blonde. And her hair follicles scream in a pained response, along with myriad club owners that remember Lindsay's (even more) coked-out, club-hopping, DUI-getting days. My advice to them? Shut it down, buddies, shut it. the fuck. down. Lohan was said to have spent ten hou...

American Idol Recap: Who’s Gonna Win This Thing Tonight?

photo of american idols lee dewyze and crystal bowersox So, is anyone still watching American Idol anymore? I know we haven't covered it practically at all this year. It seems like the thrill is gone, and you can thank B.B. King for that. Uh, indirectly, I guess. Anyway, like I said in a previous post, I'm not a huge fan of either Crystal or Lee, but if I had to choose, it'd totally be Lee. Unfortunately, after last night, I think Crystal (just based on last night's performances) kind of has it in the bag. She came across as determined and win-this-thing-...

Kristen Stewart Does Elle UK, Still Can’t Stop Sticking Her Jaw Out

photo of kristen stewart doing the cover for elle magazine in a black dress Girlfriend honestly looks like she has an under-bite when she does it. It looks awful. I mean, I love Kristen Stewart's look, I think she's classically beautiful, and if she were a lesbian and I were a lesbian and it was another time and place, I'd totally do her, but she looks way wonky when she juts out that mandible of hers. Stewart recently interviewed with Elle's UK magazine and did the obligatory photo shoot along with it and frankly, if you've looked at the photos, there's absolutely...

And Where Have You Been, Little Lamb?

photo of blonde britney spears getting into a car with messy matted hair I see a blonde, bra-ed, Britney leaving a hair salon* in Beverly Hills sans boyfriend/former-employee Jason Trawick. And you know what? Though she's smiling, and looking so much better than she did, say, two years ago (or even a year ago, when she was menstruating all over designer dresses), she doesn't look well. I mean, check out the weave for one (and didn't her hair grow back yet? For crying out loud). It's totally disheveled and almost kinda matted on the one side. Matted! How horr...