Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Can We Talk About Miley Cyrus’s Face for a Minute?

OK, so we all know how girlfriend's on an international tour because she hates Americans and we're not all that fond of her either? Well, naturally, she's doing things that go along with tours - like having professional photographers take her pictures and stuff. The photos we have her were snapped by Vijat Mohindra, who I guess is pretty famous in certain circles, but all I have to say is what a BAD JOB he did, because Miley looks about FORTY in all of these photos. Let's break it down: Miley's forehead: where'd she get that big gash of a scar? I mean, shit! I can't believe, in all of the hours I've spent studying Miley's visage, that I've never noticed that before. Miley's eyelids: this is one of the side-effects of spending way too much time in a tanning bed. Girlfriend's got eyelids like moth wings. I'm not sure I've ever seen such papery-looking lids on someone so young in my life. Miley's eyebrows: see, now, her eyebrows are actually killer. They're great. No other comments on that, I guess. Miley's way-round jaw: I know, like Lady Gaga, she was born this way, but imagine what this big-ass sucker is going to look like when she's fifty and already has forty years on the bottle as her excuse to be all swole-faced? Hell's BELLS. In short, it's gotta be a Disney thing. Look at Britney - she's not even thirty yet, is she? And Christina? They all look SO DAMN OLD and it's not because they've been famous since they walked out of the womb, either. Something's definitely afoot here, and it's not just alcoholism, /> OK, so we all know how girlfriend's on an international tour because she hates Americans and we're not all that fond of her either? Well, naturally, she's doing things that go along with tours - like having professional photographers take her pictures and stuff. The photos we have her were snapped by Vijat Mohindra, who I guess is pretty famous in certain circles, but all I have to say is what a BAD JOB he did, because Miley looks about FORTY in all of these photos. Let's break it down: M...

Morning Wood

photo of sarah michelle gellar pictures photos Methinks it's a little too late for Courtney Love to be curing AIDS. [The Superficial] What do Leo, Bob, Sean and Ryan have in common? [Lainey Gossip] The latest on Schwarzenegger's many children. [Bossip] Is Sienna Miller trying to break Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson up? That HO. [Cele|bitchy] Keira Knightley talks cheating. [Huffington Post] What are you guys listening to this week? Check these out. [The Frisky] Marion Cotillard gives birth! [Celebuzz] OK, so she's NO...

Chaz Bono Really Needs to STFU

photo of shiloh jolie-pitt boy pictures photos transgender pics Remember, like, a week ago I included a link in one of our partner roundups claiming that Chaz Bono wanted to get together with Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's 'gender-bending' daughter, Shiloh, in order to give her some confidence-boosting gems of insight and maybe some direction on who the best sex reassignment surgeons in LA are? Well it turns out mama Angie isn't having any of it. In a reveal to OK! magazine, a source close to Jolie claims she was pissed: Angelina Jolie fumed when she wa...

The Hangover II Premiered in LA Last Night!

photo of bradley cooper talking and laughing with robert downey jr at the hangover two ii premiere pictures photos pics Want to hear a little secret? I did not. see. The Hangover. Seriously. I know, to some of you, that's like saying I don't know who Dorothy Gale is or that the Beatles are one of the most overrated bands in history (oh, wait ... they are), but I just cannot tell a lie. The Hangover never made it to my list of movies I just 'gotta see.' Even now, with its rampant availability and the gentle proddings of friends who claim I'd just love it, I'm not interested. Thereby? I'm not interested in seeing ...

LOL Justin Bieber is Launching a Fragrance for Deh Wimmenz

photo of justin bieber perfume someday buy picture purchase retail pics Let's take a guess as to what it's going to smell like. I'm thinking something like ABC gum (har har har), nocturnal emissions, and ... pencil shavings. Yup. And you know what? Justin himself claims that the scent is a 'fruity gourmand,' so I'm probably pretty close with my guess. And also, what teenager (aside from the ones who have NYU lit graduates as publicists) uses the word 'gourmand'? I'm no idiot, but I had to Google that shit to make sure I read it right. I'm sure I could have whipped out my good old context clue skills to...

Evil Beet is Hiring!

So I'm gonna lay it right out: I've got some good news and some bad news, guys. The bad news is that our very talented and much-loved Molls is leaving us. She was offered an absolutely amazing opportunity that I'll let her tell you about once she's contractually allowed to, so her time on the site would have been cut down to practically none at all had she stayed. In light of this development, (cue the good news) we're hiring! The basics: -The position requires two posts daily Monday through Friday -The position also requires five posts per day on alternating weekends -This is a PAID position The requirements: - Weekday and weekend availability - Comprehensive knowledge of celebrity gossip - A unique writing voice - I don't want no vanilla news, girl - Impeccable spelling and grammar - General computer know-how - WordPress experience is a plus - You must be at least 18 years old and legally able to work in the US (and willing to prove both) - You must be a US resident Your application should include: 1) A cover letter 2) Your age and location (city and state) 3) Your current occupation and the hours you work 4) Writing samples. Preference will be given to folks who have a blog they update regularly. (It does not have to be a blog about celebrity gossip.) Applications and questions should be sent to jobs@evilbeetgossip.com with the subject line “EB Editor Application.” If the subject line says anything else, it will more than likely end up in my deleted folder. Intentionally. The deadline to apply is 12:59 pm EST on Friday, June 3rd, 2011. Also, if you yourself are not interested but know someone who'd be a good fit (or fuck, you want to see a certain writer that you happen to have locked up in your basement do some hard work) let them know about us. I'm totally looking forward to hearing all of your funniest shit, so good luck and have at it! />So I'm gonna lay it right out: I've got some good news and some bad news, guys. The bad news is that our very talented and much-loved Molls is leaving us. She was offered an absolutely amazing opportunity that I'll let her tell you about once she's contractually allowed to, so her time on the site would have been cut down to practically none at all had she stayed. In light of this development, (cue the good news) we're hiring! The basics: -The position requires two posts daily Monday thr...

Afternoon Delight

photo of super hot kellan lutz hot abs pictures photos The first photos of Two and a Half Men emerge and it's as awkward as you thought. [The Superficial] Pippa Middleton inspires bum surgery? [INFDaily] 10 hot women who could totally kick your ass. [Bossip] Is Leo looking for someone to reproduce with? 'Cause I'm totally available. [Cele|bitchy] New Pirates: does it blow already? [LA Times] Fred Armisen and Elisabeth Moss divorced. [TMZ] Why one woman doesn't feel so broken up for Maria Shriver. [The Frisky] This is. the worst haircut....

Does Arnold Schwarzenegger Have a Harem of Hos, Too?

photo of gigi goyette and arnold schwarzenegger affair pictures photos It's like Tiger 2.0 up in this bitch apparently, and mistresses from all over the country are coming out of a Schwarzenegger dong-haze in order to nail his cheating heart to the wall (which I find funny, since these same women didn't give a rat's fetid ass when they were boning him). The latest? An actress from Little House on the Prairie by the name of Gigi Goyette. The very same Gigi Goyette who's actually just lawyered up with Gloria Allred, so apparently there's business to be had here...

Quotables: Stone Temple Pilots’ Scott Weiland Was Raped as a Kid

photo of scott weiland new book memoir pictures cover photos pics "When I was 12, [a] big muscular guy, a high school senior... [who] rode the bus with me every day to school... invited me to his house. The dude raped me. It was quick, not pleasant. I was too scared to tell anyone. 'Tell anyone,' he warned, 'and you'll never have another friend in this school. I'll ruin your fuckin' reputation.' ... This is a memory I suppressed until only a few years ago when, in rehab, it came flooding back. Therapy will do that to you." This? Is totally why I'd never wan...

She Gonna Get Another Gold Record for This One, Too?

This is probably the first thing that I've EVER seen Gwyneth Paltrow do that actually made me fucking laugh out loud. Seriously. This was even more amusing than when Brad Pitt found her head in a box in Seven (though that was just way creepier, too). I think I'm actually liking her more when she acts like a corny fool rather than when she's trying to TELL ME HOW TO LIVE. What do you guys think - are you loving the ghetto side of Gwynnie? Master Gwynnie P? Big Pun reincarnated, what what? ...

Kenickie is in a Coma, Might Not Make It

photo of jeff conaway kenickie grease pictures old sick dead photos And for all of you who did not grow up loving Grease (or worse, don't know what Grease is), his name is Jeff Conaway. He was also on Taxi and most recently, Celebrity Rehab. Conaway, who fought a long public battle with pain prescriptions and alcohol abuse, relapsed and overdosed last week on what's rumored to have been pain pills. His manage released a statement last night acknowledging that Conaway had slipped into a coma after being admitted for his most recent OD: "He is in a coma and un...

Morning Wood

photo of kim kardashian pictures photos bikini ocean malfunction pics Khloe Kardashian: busting out. Everywhere. [The Superficial] Could someone please break these two UP already? [Lainey Gossip] Beyonce's 'Run the World' video premieres - the background analysis. [Bossip] Unusual sexual interests. Are they yours? [Pajiba] James Franco in new porn drama. [Huffington Post] Shauna Sand arrested for felony? [Celebrity Dirty Laundry] Rashida Jones in LINGERIE. GO. NOW. [Celebuzz] Ashley Judd in new movie? [Caught on Set] Victoria Beckham w...
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