Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Keenan Cahill Does ‘Blow’

Before any of you get all angry at me for saying such a lascivious, defamatory thing, I mean Ke$ha's 'Blow.' Not that it makes it any better if you don't know who Keenan Cahill is, but if you do? You're probably wicked pleased. If you're still not clued in as to who Keenan is, here's a brief synopsis: he's a YouTube star. Probably the funniest YouTube star to emerge since Rebecca Black (I mean, she WAS supposed to be funny, right, that whole thing WAS a joke, wasn't it?). Keenan has some k...

Breaking: Amber Portwood Tries to Commit Suicide

photo of amber portwood mugshot pictures photos According to sources at Radar Online: “Late this morning (11:34 a.m.), Anderson Police responded to a call at a residence in the 1300 block of Pleasant Meadow Drive. According to the caller, 21-year-old Amber L. Portwood was depressed and threatening to end her life. The victim, who did not appear to be injured, was transported to a local medical facility for further evaluation. An Anderson police source also confirms that the call was not made by Amber at her home, but by “a relative” ...

Sigh. Is This Girl Eighteen Yet?

photo of taylor momsen boobs pictures x nipples pics Because she's just ITCHING to be. You can tell. When Taylor Momsen turns eighteen, you just know that the nipples are going to fly. We're going to see tit, labia, bleached asshole (or maybe asshole with tons and tons of black eyeliner around it - yeah, that's probably more like it), and bestiality all over the fucking place. Emily shared similar photos yesterday, but there are even MORE super ones (AKA ones where she looks like Marilyn Manson from the neck down, with the exception of the elec...

Afternoon Delight

photo of selena gomez pictures photos Selena Gomez: pregnant? [The Superficial] Kim Kardashian has a new baby. [INFDaily] Mildred Baena never told Arnold about his son. [Cele|bitchy] Gay celebrities: out and proud. [Starpulse] The Braxton sisters take off their clothes. [Bossip] Photos of Lindsay's areolas NOT albinoed out. [Drunken Stepfather] *Site is NSFW I guess Blake Lively really wants you to know that those nudes really are of her. [Socialite Life] Russell Brand tries to pull off the rocker look again. [Caught on Set] Everyone thinks Lady Gaga's got ugly boobs. [Yeeeah] Is will.i.am losing his mind? [The Blemi...

I Know You’re Wondering What Norah Jones Has Been Up To, Right?

Well color me disappointed. I went to go ahead and categorize this post and much to my chagrin, THERE WAS NO NORAH JONES CATEGORY. Meaning? There's a 99% chance that we've never written about the fabulous Norah Jones on Evil Beet and that makes me sad. And incredulous. Because Norah Jones is, in my humble opinion, one of today's most talented and entertaining singer/songwriters. I mean, girlfriend goes WAY THE FUCK past late-night karaoke staple 'Come Away With Me.' I mean, have you even heard of of 'Sinking Soon'? Dude. Enough said. Anyway. Above you see Norah performing at the 15th annual Webby Awards, where she covered Johnny Cash's 'Ain't No Grave (Can Hold This Body Down)'. This chick and her music totally rock my world - so much so that 'Sinking Soon'? Is actually my RINGTONE. /> Well color me disappointed. I went to go ahead and categorize this post and much to my chagrin, THERE WAS NO NORAH JONES CATEGORY. Meaning? There's a 99% chance that we've never written about the fabulous Norah Jones on Evil Beet and that makes me sad. And incredulous. Because Norah Jones is, in my humble opinion, one of today's most talented and entertaining singer/songwriters. I mean, girlfriend goes WAY THE FUCK past late-night karaoke staple 'Come Away With Me.' I mean, have you even heard of...

Caption This – Last Week’s Winner and This Week’s Photo!

photo of hot jason bateman holding peanuts pictures photos It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests! Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address! (Oh, and check your email for your winner’s notice, too, OK?) We’ll be choosing the winner of the above photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is! The winner on last week’s David Hasselhoff photo: ...

Morning Wood

photo of hot eva longoria boobs butt nipslips pictures photos hot Mega-pregnant Tori Spelling wrecks her car. [The Superficial] "Bishop" Eddie Long's wife reportedly moves out on his ass. [Bossip] Ben Roethlisberger and his Steeler friends are doing lots to keep busy during the lockout. [TMZ] Pippa Middleton and her long-term boyfriend are no longer together - you know what that means, right? GINGER PUBE FEST! [Starpulse] Rihanna and Drake spent the weekend together. [Lainey Gossip] A review of the Tony Awards. [LA Times] Liev Schrieber and Naomi Watts...

Afternoon Delight

hot pictures photos of the octomom pics bikini nudes photos I mean it when I say that there's NO WAY that this could be Khloe Kardashian. [The Superficial] Bret Lockett claims that he and Kim Kardashian had phone sex. [Bossip] Jennifer Lopez wants you to get a good, hard look at her boobs. [Starpulse] Reese Witherspoon and her new husband go to church. [Celebuzz] 30 HOT Ryan Kwanten photos. [Socialite Life] You were thisclose to seeing Octomom's bikini car wash. [TMZ] Woman gets naked on a park bench, says it was to "cool off." [The Frisky] T...

Introducing Your New Writer: Jenn Frank

So as you guys all know, we did a big cattle call over the last few weeks, looking for the best and brightest of entertainment writers, and honestly? I THINK I FOUND THEM ALL. Seriously. I hit a veritable treasure trove of talent with all of the applicants that sent in their stuff. There was so much stuff to go through and the decision-making process was SO HARD. Thanks to all of you who applied, and all of those who will be at the top of my list for the next time we hire. Anyway, here's our new girl, Jenn, in her own words:
Jenn is a pop culture junkie and smut-hound. When she isn’t lampooning celebrities, she blogs about video games. She also reads comic books and collects action figures, giving her all the charm and allure of a preadolescent boy.
Jenn's cool as hell and I think you guys are really going to dig her. Show her some love like only you guys know how, and above all, be nice, OK? ;) />So as you guys all know, we did a big cattle call over the last few weeks, looking for the best and brightest of entertainment writers, and honestly? I THINK I FOUND THEM ALL. Seriously. I hit a veritable treasure trove of talent with all of the applicants that sent in their stuff. There was so much stuff to go through and the decision-making process was SO HARD. Thanks to all of you who applied, and all of those who will be at the top of my list for the next time we hire. Anyway, here's our...

Kim Kardashian’s Doing Some Serious Bride-Body Crosstraining

[Image removed upon request]

Hey Kim Kardashian. Looking good. I mean, you know, as always. You could probably have a runny shit fight and then roll in cornmeal and you'd still look awesome. And working out, too! Man. Lots to look forward to these days, big doings. A huge bitchin' honker of an engagement ring, financial security, a massive wedding to plan, babies to pop out ... there's got to be a touch of grey to all that silver lining BS, right? Like, I bet you've had moments where you've been all upset that someone threw that black camisole you're wearing in the dryer, because we ALL KNOW how fucked up those shitty faux-satin straps can get when they're tumble-dried. Chin up! [Image removed upon request] />[Image removed upon request] Hey Kim Kardashian. Looking good. I mean, you know, as always. You could probably have a runny shit fight and then roll in cornmeal and you'd still look awesome. And working out, too! Man. Lots to look forward to these days, big doings. A huge bitchin' honker of an engagement ring, financial security, a massive wedding to plan, babies to pop out ... there's got to be a touch of grey to all that silver lining BS, right? Like, I bet you've had moments where you've be...

Morning Wood

photo of christina hendricks big boobs tits pictures pics January Jones: hottest pregnancy butt ever? [The Superficial] Chris Martin seems very happy without Gwyneth. [Lainey Gossip] Contrary to popular belief, Kendra Wilkinson is not fifty-eight. [Starpulse] Uh, Kim wants HOW MUCH for engagement photos? [Bossip] Brad and Angelina donate half-a-mil to the tornado victims. [LA Times] Jane Lynch and Bill Maher recite Weiner's sexts. LOL! [Pajiba] Lily Allen: pregnant for sure. [IDLYITW] Christina Hendricks gets hit on by women. A lot. ...

Is Jessica Simpson Losing Weight For Her Wedding, Or Did She Just Stop Dressing Like a Pregnant Hobo?

photo of jessica simpson and eric johnson weight loss pictures recent photos I've said before, I've got nothing but mad love for Jessica Simpson. MAD LOVE. She might not be a smart girl, but she's good-hearted, she's sweet, and she's pretty as the day is long. That being said, engagement and wedding-planning look really good on her. I don't particularly think she's lost a whole lot of weight, rather I think that she's just dressing better lately and not choosing the most unflattering articles of clothing of all time. It helps a lot. Even when Jess was younger and...
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