Guys, I almost fell off my chair when I found this picture, partially because I just watched this movie the other day and laughed my ass off at the quote, "We're his goddamn kids, too." For whatever reason it never struck me as funny back in '93 when the movie first came out, because I was 10 and knew that if I said something like that to my parents (or, God, even laughed about it), well. Let's just say I might not have the fingers to be typing this business to you all today.
Jump in to fi...
Hey, guys, look: it's Ashley Tisdale, and she's not wearing any makeup. :X
See, it's these kinds of photos make me so happy. Gleeful, even. And you know why? Not because of that "without all the makeup, celebrities are just like us BS" excuse, even though it's true---but because if you have the right stylists and makeup artists and wardrobe specialists, we could all be f-cking Angelina Jolie and Halle Berry. I mean, have you seen those women without their faces on? Yeah, because for the most par...
You know who's turning eighteen this year? Duh. Courtney Stodden. And you know what's going to happen when she does turn eighteen (on August 29th)? She's going to leave this old-ass man in the dust, hook up with Vivid Entertainment, and we're going to see some of the most intimate sides of Courtney Stodden than we've ever seen before (you know, things like the lines in the palms of her hands, her pinky toenail, and maybe even some armpit hair---I mean, we've seen everything else already).
In light of Courtney's official countdown, she's filming videos chronicling her voyage to the big 1-8, and since she apparently can't get a real---excuse me, "rill"---reality show, she's settling for filming her own and posting it on YouTube. The sad part? This video's been up for an entire DAY, and it's only gotten just over 3k views.
This particular segment is about Courtney's sprained foot. Now, I'm no doctor, but I'm pretty sure that it's actually NOT a sprained foot, and might be some kind of Staph or MRSA infection instead, what with the God-knows-what she probably picks up on those cheap Lucite stripper heels she wears everywhere. I think Shauna Sand has the same pair, or hey---maybe it's that pair. Courtney's a sucker for used eBay items, you know.
Anyway, she spends literally the first entire minute of the video whining about her foot, and then she calls her mom---who sounds like just as big of an idiot---and complains about her foot. This takes us to the 2:45-ish mark, where Doug enters the picture thus confirming that his career is officially f-cking over thus confirming that his career is officially f-cking over. Courtney appears in panties and a tight tank top and---obviously---complains about her foot. Doug is wearing the standard-issue skullcap that makes me want to punch him in the throat, and he tells her that she should stop wearing the stupid shoes.
This is where it gets good. Or, "good," rather.
Guys? Courtney Stodden is, like, so embarrassing. And to be honest, Doug Hutchison looks even worse (I know, I was surprised, too). Watching the two of them interact with one another is really kind of painful. It's like watching some kind of weird, incestuous relationship between a father and a daughter, and my skin is f-cking crawling just typing all that. Both of these characters are seriously weird birds, and I'm almost kind of excited by the prospect of this whole weird-bird thing completely imploding come Courtney's eighteenth birthday, and you know what? I'm not sorry for it. />
You know who's turning eighteen this year? Duh. Courtney Stodden. And you know what's going to happen when she does turn eighteen (on August 29th)? She's going to leave this old-ass man in the dust, hook up with Vivid Entertainment, and we're going to see some of the most intimate sides of Courtney Stodden than we've ever seen before (you know, things like the lines in the palms of her hands, her pinky toenail, and maybe even some armpit hair---I mean, we've seen everything else already).
In light of...
The caption to the above photo? "Testing...."
If you're unsure who that nose belongs to, it's Demi Moore, and this is the first activity we've seen on Twitter since January 7th. Can you believe it? Three whole months have gone by that Demi's not said a thing on her favorite personal outlet of all time. Don't you guys remember a time when it'd be commonplace to see what Demi was wearing that day, or to hear cryptic messages about seeing through people (gee, wonder who that one ended up being...
Gerard Butler bangs chicks in Port-a-Potties. [The Superficial]
Angelina Jolie's showing off. [Lainey Gossip]
Derek Hough grosses me out. [Starpulse]
Edible fashion. [theBERRY]
Blind Item: which lying actress is about to lose her job? [Socialite Life]
Simon Cowell picked up a random, banged her, and she robbed him. [TMZ]
Rihanna's "leaked" Hawaii vacation photos. [Cele|bitchy]
Eden Wood is high on pixie stix. [The Frisky]
The nude Allure issue. [Socialite Life]
Michelle Obama's embarrassing prom photo. [Bitten and Bound]
Ted Nugent is completely crazy. [Huff Po]
Ke...
"She doesn't care. She really doesn't. She's happy with Justin [Theroux]. She'll probably marry him. She's moved on. People don't want to believe it, but she has."
The wise, sage words above came directly from one of Jen's "close friends" who leaked the unofficial statement that Jennifer probably paid him or her to make to the media. And while I'd like to think that Jennifer doesn't care, as some of her friends say, she does care, and she probably cares a whole lot. Hollywood Life tells a dif...
BREAKING: Kanye West makes up his own drama. [TMZ]
Wiccan Yoga Sex Coven? [The Frisky]
More Miley Cyrus Pilates fashion courtesy of Ho Bag Wholesale. [The Superficial]
Audrina Patridge goes see-through. [Starpulse]
Justin Timberlake and Ben Affleck are BFFs. [Lainey Gossip]
'Fifty Shades of Grey' author selling lots of other stuff. [LA Times]
Everybody finally loves Florence. [LA Times]
Angelina Jolie is so, so happy. [Cele|bitchy]
Mila Kunis denies riding Kutcher. [The Superficial]
Russell Simmo...
Just when we thought girlfriend was doing SO GOOD, she goes and wears this. On television. In front of other people.
This is what Christina wore on last night's The Voice, and it was a bad, bad choice, guys. I don't understand why, when she's got such a fabulous figure, she has to choose such heinous outfits and stage costumes, because this, friends, is probably the pinnacle of "worst." And yes, I know that's kind of redundant, but our continual posts about how awful Christina's fashion choi...
It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests! Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!
We’ll be choosing the winner of the above photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!
The winner on last week’s Bam Margera photo: mikied
"I’m thinking if I mesmerize you with this creepy stare, you...
Now isn't that cute---or creepy! I just can't tell which one, friends.
The above photo captures Jason Segel arriving at his home in Burbank after filming a segment on the Tonight Show With Jay Leno.
But here are the facts:
---Jason Segel is a thirty-two year-old man who made "I love u" stickers and has them ON HIS PHONE
---Even though we just Jason Segel around these parts, I'm not going to lie---this is kind of f-cking creepy
---Jason Segel just does not look OK in that picture...
Did you guys hear? The Duchess's sister Pippa---of bum fame---might be headed to jail. Wouldn't that be something? Apparently a friend she was traveling with over the weekend decided to pull a gun on one of those crazy-intrusive photographers just, you know, doing their job, and it was obviously caught on film.
The photographer was pursuing Pippa and her friends through the streets of France (safe, that is; sounds familiar, doesn't it?), and when the photographer got close enough, the driver o...
Wow, is this shit weird.
Tupac the Hologram was brought back to perform at this year's Coachella festival with Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, and it was like it was 1994 all over again. Tupac took the stage late last night, and Eminem, 50 Cent, and Wiz Khalifa joined them at one point for a generally all-star non-sucking-rap cast of characters. Except for 50---he's questionable.
Tons of people on Twitter squawked about how Tupac had returned from the grave, and his performance was "eerie" and "chilling," but I know better. How can someone who's never died come back to life? Jeez.
Of course, the buzz has begun, Tupac's the next big thing for young kids who've never even heard of him, and Hologram Tupac even has a Twitter account now, and is firing back at "haters" by ... well, calling them haters:
Wow, is this shit weird.
Tupac the Hologram was brought back to perform at this year's Coachella festival with Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, and it was like it was 1994 all over again. Tupac took the stage late last night, and Eminem, 50 Cent, and Wiz Khalifa joined them at one point for a generally all-star non-sucking-rap cast of characters. Except for 50---he's questionable.
Tons of people on Twitter squawked about how Tupac had returned from the grave, and his performance was "eerie" and ...
Guys, I almost fell off my chair when I found this picture, partially because I just watched this movie the other day and laughed my ass off at the quote, "We're his goddamn kids, too." For whatever reason it never struck me as funny back in '93 when the movie first came out, because I was 10 and knew that if I said something like that to my parents (or, God, even laughed about it), well. Let's just say I might not have the fingers to be typing this business to you all today.
Jump in to fi...
Hey, guys, look: it's Ashley Tisdale, and she's not wearing any makeup. :X
See, it's these kinds of photos make me so happy. Gleeful, even. And you know why? Not because of that "without all the makeup, celebrities are just like us BS" excuse, even though it's true---but because if you have the right stylists and makeup artists and wardrobe specialists, we could all be f-cking Angelina Jolie and Halle Berry. I mean, have you seen those women without their faces on? Yeah, because for the most par...
The caption to the above photo? "Testing...."
If you're unsure who that nose belongs to, it's Demi Moore, and this is the first activity we've seen on Twitter since January 7th. Can you believe it? Three whole months have gone by that Demi's not said a thing on her favorite personal outlet of all time. Don't you guys remember a time when it'd be commonplace to see what Demi was wearing that day, or to hear cryptic messages about seeing through people (gee, wonder who that one ended up being...
Gerard Butler bangs chicks in Port-a-Potties. [The Superficial]
Angelina Jolie's showing off. [Lainey Gossip]
Derek Hough grosses me out. [Starpulse]
Edible fashion. [theBERRY]
Blind Item: which lying actress is about to lose her job? [Socialite Life]
Simon Cowell picked up a random, banged her, and she robbed him. [TMZ]
Rihanna's "leaked" Hawaii vacation photos. [Cele|bitchy]
Eden Wood is high on pixie stix. [The Frisky]
The nude Allure issue. [Socialite Life]
Michelle Obama's embarrassing prom photo. [Bitten and Bound]
Ted Nugent is completely crazy. [Huff Po]
Ke...
"She doesn't care. She really doesn't. She's happy with Justin [Theroux]. She'll probably marry him. She's moved on. People don't want to believe it, but she has."
The wise, sage words above came directly from one of Jen's "close friends" who leaked the unofficial statement that Jennifer probably paid him or her to make to the media. And while I'd like to think that Jennifer doesn't care, as some of her friends say, she does care, and she probably cares a whole lot. Hollywood Life tells a dif...
BREAKING: Kanye West makes up his own drama. [TMZ]
Wiccan Yoga Sex Coven? [The Frisky]
More Miley Cyrus Pilates fashion courtesy of Ho Bag Wholesale. [The Superficial]
Audrina Patridge goes see-through. [Starpulse]
Justin Timberlake and Ben Affleck are BFFs. [Lainey Gossip]
'Fifty Shades of Grey' author selling lots of other stuff. [LA Times]
Everybody finally loves Florence. [LA Times]
Angelina Jolie is so, so happy. [Cele|bitchy]
Mila Kunis denies riding Kutcher. [The Superficial]
Russell Simmo...
Just when we thought girlfriend was doing SO GOOD, she goes and wears this. On television. In front of other people.
This is what Christina wore on last night's The Voice, and it was a bad, bad choice, guys. I don't understand why, when she's got such a fabulous figure, she has to choose such heinous outfits and stage costumes, because this, friends, is probably the pinnacle of "worst." And yes, I know that's kind of redundant, but our continual posts about how awful Christina's fashion choi...
It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests! Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!
We’ll be choosing the winner of the above photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!
The winner on last week’s Bam Margera photo: mikied
"I’m thinking if I mesmerize you with this creepy stare, you...
Now isn't that cute---or creepy! I just can't tell which one, friends.
The above photo captures Jason Segel arriving at his home in Burbank after filming a segment on the Tonight Show With Jay Leno.
But here are the facts:
---Jason Segel is a thirty-two year-old man who made "I love u" stickers and has them ON HIS PHONE
---Even though we just Jason Segel around these parts, I'm not going to lie---this is kind of f-cking creepy
---Jason Segel just does not look OK in that picture...
Did you guys hear? The Duchess's sister Pippa---of bum fame---might be headed to jail. Wouldn't that be something? Apparently a friend she was traveling with over the weekend decided to pull a gun on one of those crazy-intrusive photographers just, you know, doing their job, and it was obviously caught on film.
The photographer was pursuing Pippa and her friends through the streets of France (safe, that is; sounds familiar, doesn't it?), and when the photographer got close enough, the driver o...
Wow, is this shit weird.
Tupac the Hologram was brought back to perform at this year's Coachella festival with Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, and it was like it was 1994 all over again. Tupac took the stage late last night, and Eminem, 50 Cent, and Wiz Khalifa joined them at one point for a generally all-star non-sucking-rap cast of characters. Except for 50---he's questionable.
Tons of people on Twitter squawked about how Tupac had returned from the grave, and his performance was "eerie" and ...