Dear Madonna:
Everyone already hates you. You don't need to keep doing dumb crap to piss us all off. It's not making you cute, it's not making you cutting-edge, and it's not gaining you any new fans. No, quite the opposite, actually---you're look silly, bitter, dated, and boring. Oh, and heartless---I heard about your "I'm keeping my guns, y'all" stunt earlier this morning, and I have to say, I'm pretty disappointed. I knew you were pretty much the lowest of pretentious-low, but this just ta...
Justin Bieber gets in on the Jackson family. [The Superficial]
Mario Lopez: a creeper in gold body paint. [Bitten and Bound]
Sofia Vergara joins 'Family Guy'. [Starpulse]
I can't get over Alessandra Ambrosio's boyfriend. [Socialite Life]
PHOTOS: Just the attractive people at the Teen Choice Awards. [Celebslam]
Demi Lovato's nipslip. [Yeeeah]
The first lawsuit against James Holmes and 'Batman' is here. [The Blemish]
Bat for Lashes, nude. [OMGBlog]
How to handle a dude with bagg...
It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests! Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!
We’ll be choosing the winner of the above photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!
The winner on last week’s Magic Mike photo: Brooke
Shakin my ball sack brings all the girls to the bar
but my li...
I mean, if it weren't for the fact that her nose is all contorted from all of that cocaine use, and her lips are still all plumped out like a puffer fish's ass---oh, and the fake teeth, too, I forgot about those---Lindsay Lohan might actually look like a shadow of her former self in these pictures, and how about them apples, huh? I mean, yeah, she's still got the wonk-eyed crack leer of a seasoned crackhead, and all that self-tanner has positively ruined her skin tone, making it dull and ashy-lo...
J Woww's big, purple cleavage. [The Superficial]
The pizza guitar. [The Frisky]
The Jackson family is fighting over Michael Jackson's kids now, too. [TMZ]
Audrina Patridge is ready to show you her boobs again. [Starpulse]
Mariah Carey is a "nightmare" to work with. Says her cameltoe. [Lainey Gossip]
Jesse Metcalfe is being all freaky on a boat. [Socialite Life]
Demi Lovato's nipslip. [Yeeeah]
Sofia Vergara loses her ass. [I'm Not Obsessed]
Minka Kelly's sex tape. [IDLYITW]
Jennifer Aniston's bust...
I feel like I'm always trying really, really hard to like Lea Michele as a person (aside from her acting, and her nasal voice, and her "super-sexy-secret tattoos! #OMGBUTTERFLY"), but always falling really, really short. So I'll just go with what I'm pretty skilled at, which is being superficial and only focusing on what a celebrity has to offer on the outside.
These photos of Lea Michele at the Fox All Stars event, for example. I love this dress. I love her messy plait. I love her shoes a...
Well, maybe. She did strike out with both Deryck Whibley and that bag of dicks, Brody Jenner, so maybe she's gone and decided that she'd do better batting (or catching, or whatever) for the other team.
These photos are of Avril Lavigne and some friends in Cabo San Lucas, where water-frolicking, beer-drinking, and general revelry happened, because DUH, Sk8er Boi. It's about time that Avril got back out into the world, too, because she and that Jenner asshat broke up back in January, and there's hardly been word of her since then. ...
Or, at least, judging by her photo, you'd think she'd be, because this current getup---like many of her other getups---is straight out of an 80's budget strip club.
Also, can we talk about girlfriend's beat-ass Lucite heels for a second? Because these bitches are just worse for the wear. She's worn them so much that the plastic on top is actually starting to crack and yellow. Does she really love these shoes *so hard* that she's willing to look like trash in order to keep them? Wait. ... No, ...
From Celebrity Fix:
Both Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom have been spotted without their wedding rings, sparking rumours their marriage is in trouble.
29-year-old Miranda was snapped without hers in New York last week, and a friend of the couple told Famous magazine that their relationship could be on the rocks.
"[Miranda and Orlando's marriage] might be in trouble," they said.
"She's not wearing her ring, and she's had a lot on her plate — it could be that somewhere along the way her...
“I don’t know. I mean … I don’t know. People have been having babies a long time.”
Katie Holmes' response when C magazine asked her whether or not the "birth" of Suri Cruise brought Katie and Tom together as a "family." And to that, I say LOL! Girlfriend sure was dropping the gauntlet on Tom for a few many months leading up to her secretly-hatched escape, huh? The interviewer also claims that Katie didn't speak Tom's name aloud---not once---throughout the entire interview, and kind o...
How does someone who used to look like this:
Go to looking something like this:
In a matter of what seems like six months? What the hell happened? Was there some kind of bomb dropped on Ralph's house that I don't know about that rendered him homeless for the last four-of-six months, and in that time, he grew this heinous crapbag of a beard and grew his hair out to what I like to call "creepy-chic," and then, on top of all of that, demolished all of his normally-on-point clothing choic...
Before you ask, no, I did not watch the 2012 Teen Choice Awards, and before some of you start off with, "Well, that's kind of your *job*, Sarah, to subject yourselves to these (sometimes- but always-in-the-case-of-Kids'-Choice-or-Teen-Choice-Awards horrendous shows)," but let me correct you---no, it's not. There is not a person in this world paid enough to sit through three-plus hours of Justin Bieber, unless, of course, you're Justin Bieber. OK? What did I do, then, last night? Well I barbecu...
Dear Madonna:
Everyone already hates you. You don't need to keep doing dumb crap to piss us all off. It's not making you cute, it's not making you cutting-edge, and it's not gaining you any new fans. No, quite the opposite, actually---you're look silly, bitter, dated, and boring. Oh, and heartless---I heard about your "I'm keeping my guns, y'all" stunt earlier this morning, and I have to say, I'm pretty disappointed. I knew you were pretty much the lowest of pretentious-low, but this just ta...
Justin Bieber gets in on the Jackson family. [The Superficial]
Mario Lopez: a creeper in gold body paint. [Bitten and Bound]
Sofia Vergara joins 'Family Guy'. [Starpulse]
I can't get over Alessandra Ambrosio's boyfriend. [Socialite Life]
PHOTOS: Just the attractive people at the Teen Choice Awards. [Celebslam]
Demi Lovato's nipslip. [Yeeeah]
The first lawsuit against James Holmes and 'Batman' is here. [The Blemish]
Bat for Lashes, nude. [OMGBlog]
How to handle a dude with bagg...
It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests! Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!
We’ll be choosing the winner of the above photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!
The winner on last week’s Magic Mike photo: Brooke
Shakin my ball sack brings all the girls to the bar
but my li...
I mean, if it weren't for the fact that her nose is all contorted from all of that cocaine use, and her lips are still all plumped out like a puffer fish's ass---oh, and the fake teeth, too, I forgot about those---Lindsay Lohan might actually look like a shadow of her former self in these pictures, and how about them apples, huh? I mean, yeah, she's still got the wonk-eyed crack leer of a seasoned crackhead, and all that self-tanner has positively ruined her skin tone, making it dull and ashy-lo...
J Woww's big, purple cleavage. [The Superficial]
The pizza guitar. [The Frisky]
The Jackson family is fighting over Michael Jackson's kids now, too. [TMZ]
Audrina Patridge is ready to show you her boobs again. [Starpulse]
Mariah Carey is a "nightmare" to work with. Says her cameltoe. [Lainey Gossip]
Jesse Metcalfe is being all freaky on a boat. [Socialite Life]
Demi Lovato's nipslip. [Yeeeah]
Sofia Vergara loses her ass. [I'm Not Obsessed]
Minka Kelly's sex tape. [IDLYITW]
Jennifer Aniston's bust...
I feel like I'm always trying really, really hard to like Lea Michele as a person (aside from her acting, and her nasal voice, and her "super-sexy-secret tattoos! #OMGBUTTERFLY"), but always falling really, really short. So I'll just go with what I'm pretty skilled at, which is being superficial and only focusing on what a celebrity has to offer on the outside.
These photos of Lea Michele at the Fox All Stars event, for example. I love this dress. I love her messy plait. I love her shoes a...
Well, maybe. She did strike out with both Deryck Whibley and that bag of dicks, Brody Jenner, so maybe she's gone and decided that she'd do better batting (or catching, or whatever) for the other team.
These photos are of Avril Lavigne and some friends in Cabo San Lucas, where water-frolicking, beer-drinking, and general revelry happened, because DUH, Sk8er Boi. It's about time that Avril got back out into the world, too, because she and that Jenner asshat broke up back in January, and there's hardly been word of her since then. ...
Or, at least, judging by her photo, you'd think she'd be, because this current getup---like many of her other getups---is straight out of an 80's budget strip club.
Also, can we talk about girlfriend's beat-ass Lucite heels for a second? Because these bitches are just worse for the wear. She's worn them so much that the plastic on top is actually starting to crack and yellow. Does she really love these shoes *so hard* that she's willing to look like trash in order to keep them? Wait. ... No, ...
From Celebrity Fix:
Both Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom have been spotted without their wedding rings, sparking rumours their marriage is in trouble.
29-year-old Miranda was snapped without hers in New York last week, and a friend of the couple told Famous magazine that their relationship could be on the rocks.
"[Miranda and Orlando's marriage] might be in trouble," they said.
"She's not wearing her ring, and she's had a lot on her plate — it could be that somewhere along the way her...
“I don’t know. I mean … I don’t know. People have been having babies a long time.”
Katie Holmes' response when C magazine asked her whether or not the "birth" of Suri Cruise brought Katie and Tom together as a "family." And to that, I say LOL! Girlfriend sure was dropping the gauntlet on Tom for a few many months leading up to her secretly-hatched escape, huh? The interviewer also claims that Katie didn't speak Tom's name aloud---not once---throughout the entire interview, and kind o...
How does someone who used to look like this:
Go to looking something like this:
In a matter of what seems like six months? What the hell happened? Was there some kind of bomb dropped on Ralph's house that I don't know about that rendered him homeless for the last four-of-six months, and in that time, he grew this heinous crapbag of a beard and grew his hair out to what I like to call "creepy-chic," and then, on top of all of that, demolished all of his normally-on-point clothing choic...
Before you ask, no, I did not watch the 2012 Teen Choice Awards, and before some of you start off with, "Well, that's kind of your *job*, Sarah, to subject yourselves to these (sometimes- but always-in-the-case-of-Kids'-Choice-or-Teen-Choice-Awards horrendous shows)," but let me correct you---no, it's not. There is not a person in this world paid enough to sit through three-plus hours of Justin Bieber, unless, of course, you're Justin Bieber. OK? What did I do, then, last night? Well I barbecu...