Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Only Live Lindsay Could Be Sadder than Celebrity Death

57797780lohan1628200921601pm Lilo was in Las Vegas yesterday at a pool party to launch her tanning line Sevin Nyne. Hasn't this crap been launched like, 5 times already? I'm not sure what the company is thinking, but the more times Lindsay shows up somewhere looking like this, that's one less bottle of product they're going to sell. Even though her birthday isn't until July 2nd, the shindig also morphed into a kind of birthday celebration for the Lo-ho-- complete with disgruntled-looking chefs holding a giant cake and be...

Kendra Wilkinson Ties the Knot

90628p1_wilkinson_b-gr_02 Wilkinson and (now) hubby Hank Baskett did the matrimonial deed last night on the grounds of the Playboy mansion.  Judging by these photos (that appear to have been taken from a helicopter) the ceremony looks very glamorous and classy, in spite of the fact that it took place at the bride's geriatric ex-boyfriend's house. That's a little strange to me, but I must be very old-fashioned. Excuse me while I go launder my chastity belt in the washtub. "Holly cried like a faucet and I held back tears,...

Infomercial Pitchman Billy Mays Found Dead

Informercial Pitchman Billy Mays Found Dead Okay. I've had enough now. Billy Mays, the TV pitchman whose trademark voice helped sell everything from cleaning supplies to baking soda, was found dead this morning by his wife at his Tampa home. No cause of death has been reported and no foul play is suspected, according to Tampa police. Mays, 50, was pronounced dead at 7:45 a.m. at a Bowen Daniel Drive condo. His wife, Deborah Mays, found him unresponsive this morning. The Medical Examiner's Office will complete Mays' autopsy by tomorrow aft...

Madonna Takes Mercy to Kabbalah Meetings

90627l3_madonna_b_gr_05 Madonna took newly purchased adopted daughter Mercy to the Kabbalah Centre in London this morning, along with David, Lourdes, Rocco, and ex husband Guy Ritchie. Madonna gave Mercy a piggy back ride as the two quickly exited the center and ducked into a waiting car. To better introduce her to Kabbalah, Madge plans to take Mercy to Jerusalem to see the Wailing Wall. The trip won't occur until later in the year however; Madonna wants to give Mercy time to "settle in" to her new London home. Merc...

The Game, Chris Brown & P.Diddy Release Michael Jackson Tribute Track of Exceptional Quality

This debuted on L.A. radio Friday morning. I'd like to write something about it, but I'm too busy deciding whether to laugh or vomit. So I'll just let the song's lyrics speak for themselves. "The world is Michael Jackson. I'm Michael Jackson. You're Michael Jackson. We all Michael Jackson." < Insert vocal track of Chris Brown singing about some angels crying > And I'm not sure, but at about 1:08 I think The Game is confessing that both he and Usher were molested....

I See Your True Colors, Kodak

meganfoxrose Remember the kid who tried to give Megan Fox a yellow rose at the London premiere of Transformers and was "snubbed?" Remember how Kodak uncovered the boy's true identity, then offered to fly him to New York and arrange a meeting with Fox during her segment on the Today show in an odd and oblique attempt to market their products? Earlier this week, Wendie reported that Harvey once again failed to deliver his token of affection when coverage of Michael Jackson's death bumped the Fox segment on...

Bradley Cooper: I See London, I See France. I Don’t See Jen in Her Underpants

Bradley Cooper attends the Louis Vuitton Show during Paris Fashion Week Perhaps "I am not dating Jennifer Aniston" should be added to those little yellow books of commonly used foreign language phrases; right between "Hello" and "Where is the American Embassy?" At the Louis Vuitton show in Paris yesterday, Bradley Cooper spoke to reporters and once again denied that he and Jennifer Aniston are an item.  And he did it in French. Hot. Translated: She's a friend of mine. Simply, simply, just a friend. In America, its not like it is here. She's someone who is sup...

Within Striking Distance

infphoto_1005779 As part of his sentencing, Chris Brown was ordered not to come within 50 yards of Rihanna. But both Rihanna and Brown reportedly want to nix that part of the punishment. “They think it’s unnecessary and ridiculous,” told a common friend of the protection order that was given at this week’s criminal proceeding....“After [the proceeding], Ri and Chris talked on the phone for almost an hour and really worked at becoming friends. They’re solid now.” But the two are unable to speak in public to one another... T...

9-1-1 Tapes, Tributes, and Conspiracy Theories

infphoto_1009600 If you're interested, the entire 911 call has been released, in which an unknown caller indicates that Jackson's private doctor was in the room when he collapsed and may have seen what happened. Meanwhile, fans have gathered outside Michael Jackson's parents' home in L.A., the L.A. coroner's office, Jackson's star on the walk of fame, Jackson's Beverly Hills home, and the Apollo theater in New York to pay homage to the "King of Pop" in ways both big, and small... and strange. The dancin...

Don’t Come Between Susan Boyle and Her Pussy

Susan Boyle - June 17th, 2009 After cancelling a performance earlier this week due to "fatigue", Susan Boyle has once again raised concerns about her mental health after having a full on freak out last evening shortly before she was scheduled to sing during the Liverpool performance of the Britain's Got Talent tour. Sources say that she was acting strangely all night, wandering around looking dazed and "scratching her belly with her top pulled up." She later became hysterical and "repeatedly bawled: 'Where’s my cat... I...

This Little Piggy Said “Wee Wee Wee”

brunopigpenis Pictures from today's Bruno photocall in front of the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin, Germany. What scares me more than Sacha's thong is the fact that the other two models don't have one on. As a side note, posing as a pig with a knit penis is pretty much the only time it's acceptable to wear pink Ugg boots. [gallery] ...
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