Image via The Closer on Facebook
You guys watch TV, right? Okay: Are TNT and USA in some kind of Sisyphean competition to see which network can have the freakiest Magritte-style promos? (I mean, really.)
And what is with this photo of Kyra Sedgwick? Can you even call it a photo?
Here she is, airbrushed within the last spindly inch of her life, in a promotional still for The Closer. Poor saintly Kyra has been snipped, cropped, and dropshadowed, but worst of all---and, granted, you might ...
Whoooaaaaa! Did you feel that? That was the Earth settling contentedly on its axis, as all the Cosmos shrug: Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag are flat broke. Or at least, that's what the couple reports in a piteous new interview.
But perhaps they are also a little older, a little wiser? Hmm.
Spencer illuminates how the couple blew their meager fortune:
My whole million-dollar wardrobe---I would never wear that again. They're props. Everything we were doing, we were buying props. I boug...
We all live in a murderous world, as the events in Norway have shown, with 97 [sic] dead. Though that is nothing compared to what happens in McDonald's and Kentucky Fried S---t every day.
---Morrissey, at a concert in Poland...
Image by Terry Richardson
Amy Winehouse's family now claims that she died of the "shock" of alcohol withdrawal. Her family maintains she quit drinking "cold turkey" in the month following her humiliating final performance in Belgrade.
Hollywood Life spoke with three experts---Dr. Ronald Minutoli and Dr. Andrew Rosenbaum of New York, along with addiction specialist Marty Brenner of California---to glean a better understanding of the detox process:
In the U.S. 50 to 60 percent of alcoholics will develo...
Image by Randy Holmes via Entertainment Weekly
Harrison Ford---the original space maverick---visited "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" last night to promote Cowboys & Aliens.
Below, a video of the episode's "cold open"; in it, someone from Harrison's past suddenly materializes, anxious to cash in on a few old favors. (Harrison's overzealousness is kind of alarming, but at least he is committed, and anyway, the whole thing was directed by Jon Favreau.)
Laugh it up, fuzzballs.
...
When I heard they were making a movie based on the board game Battleship, I was thrilled.
The way I envisioned it, the movie opens on a suburban, single dad and his 9-year-old son: they're in the middle of some kind of spat, maybe having to do with Absent Mom. Anyway, now the 9-year old is giving Dad the cold shoulder.
So Dad sets up the board game in the living room, a sort of invitation for Son to work through his anger issues. From there, maybe it could be like Zathura crossed with ...
Image courtesy Daily Gab
A few days ago, a letter-writer emailed the Awful Truth, wondering why Kate Bosworth wasn't around when Alex Skarsgård received his doctorate. A prescient question! Now we know the real reason we never see these kids together anymore: they totally aren't dating.
After two years, the couple is dunzo, splitsville, finito, over. "It was very mutual," Us reports, "and it happened a while ago."
Mutual, huh? Lainey Gossip tells a different story:
I've also heard from multiple and ...
So a couple days ago, David Thorpe of the humor website Something Awful (dot com) thought it would be pretty funny to pick a fight with Matthew Lillard. Actually, David Thorpe was right; it is pretty funny.
First of all, way harsh, Tai. Who hates on Hackers? I mean, it stars a pre-nose job Angelina Jolie, Penn of Penn and Teller, Marc Anthony, an extremely babyfaced Jesse Bradford (Swimfan), and a jillion pairs of rollerblades.
But that is neither here nor there, because Mr. Thorpe is st...
Image via Pop2it
For the last three years, Heather Matarazzo---she starred in Welcome to the Dollhouse---has been engaged to her special friend, Caroline Murphy. And now that same-sex marriage is legal in New York state, the couple is really going to do it!
But not right away! They plan to take time in planning their nuptials. Caroline Murphy, to the AP: "I always wanted a wedding. Not a trip to City Hall."
One bride plans to wear a dress; the other bride, a white pantsuit, "but a sexy one." ...
Mike Tyson posted this photo to Twitter two days ago (via), along with the caption, "Moments like this make everything all worth it. Check out my young fan with my face tattoo."
Frankly, it was irresponsible of Tyson to post this photo. What if tattoo artist S. Victor Whitmill tries to sue the pants off this baby? (See also.)...
Yesterday afternoon, Vulture published the single funniest headline I've ever seen outside of the Onion ("Dave Chappelle Tells One Joke at Charity Event, Proceeds to Stare Down Audience"). Chappelle's awkward 53-minute set was hosted as part of ex-NBA player Alonzo Mourning's Summer Groove charity gala Friday night. The set bombed, and CNN analyst Roland S. Martin sat in the audience, livetweeting the whole mess.
Dave Chappelle somehow saw, and recognized, the CNN analyst in the crowd. "…Dave started...
On the latest episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, a very anxious Kim Kardashian visits a dermatologist to find out about the pink spots on her legs.
In the video, when Kim says, "Khloe seems to think I have ringworm," I initially went into a full-on WebMD panic, like, OH NO! Annular lesions are a symptom of Subacute Cutaneous Lupus Erythematosus! Also, syphilis!
But my panic lasted only a second, because then Kim pulls up her cuffed pantleg, and anyone with a genetic autoimmune disease...
Image via The Closer on Facebook
You guys watch TV, right? Okay: Are TNT and USA in some kind of Sisyphean competition to see which network can have the freakiest Magritte-style promos? (I mean, really.)
And what is with this photo of Kyra Sedgwick? Can you even call it a photo?
Here she is, airbrushed within the last spindly inch of her life, in a promotional still for The Closer. Poor saintly Kyra has been snipped, cropped, and dropshadowed, but worst of all---and, granted, you might ...
Whoooaaaaa! Did you feel that? That was the Earth settling contentedly on its axis, as all the Cosmos shrug: Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag are flat broke. Or at least, that's what the couple reports in a piteous new interview.
But perhaps they are also a little older, a little wiser? Hmm.
Spencer illuminates how the couple blew their meager fortune:
My whole million-dollar wardrobe---I would never wear that again. They're props. Everything we were doing, we were buying props. I boug...
We all live in a murderous world, as the events in Norway have shown, with 97 [sic] dead. Though that is nothing compared to what happens in McDonald's and Kentucky Fried S---t every day.
---Morrissey, at a concert in Poland...
Image by Terry Richardson
Amy Winehouse's family now claims that she died of the "shock" of alcohol withdrawal. Her family maintains she quit drinking "cold turkey" in the month following her humiliating final performance in Belgrade.
Hollywood Life spoke with three experts---Dr. Ronald Minutoli and Dr. Andrew Rosenbaum of New York, along with addiction specialist Marty Brenner of California---to glean a better understanding of the detox process:
In the U.S. 50 to 60 percent of alcoholics will develo...
Image by Randy Holmes via Entertainment Weekly
Harrison Ford---the original space maverick---visited "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" last night to promote Cowboys & Aliens.
Below, a video of the episode's "cold open"; in it, someone from Harrison's past suddenly materializes, anxious to cash in on a few old favors. (Harrison's overzealousness is kind of alarming, but at least he is committed, and anyway, the whole thing was directed by Jon Favreau.)
Laugh it up, fuzzballs.
...
When I heard they were making a movie based on the board game Battleship, I was thrilled.
The way I envisioned it, the movie opens on a suburban, single dad and his 9-year-old son: they're in the middle of some kind of spat, maybe having to do with Absent Mom. Anyway, now the 9-year old is giving Dad the cold shoulder.
So Dad sets up the board game in the living room, a sort of invitation for Son to work through his anger issues. From there, maybe it could be like Zathura crossed with ...
Image courtesy Daily Gab
A few days ago, a letter-writer emailed the Awful Truth, wondering why Kate Bosworth wasn't around when Alex Skarsgård received his doctorate. A prescient question! Now we know the real reason we never see these kids together anymore: they totally aren't dating.
After two years, the couple is dunzo, splitsville, finito, over. "It was very mutual," Us reports, "and it happened a while ago."
Mutual, huh? Lainey Gossip tells a different story:
I've also heard from multiple and ...
So a couple days ago, David Thorpe of the humor website Something Awful (dot com) thought it would be pretty funny to pick a fight with Matthew Lillard. Actually, David Thorpe was right; it is pretty funny.
First of all, way harsh, Tai. Who hates on Hackers? I mean, it stars a pre-nose job Angelina Jolie, Penn of Penn and Teller, Marc Anthony, an extremely babyfaced Jesse Bradford (Swimfan), and a jillion pairs of rollerblades.
But that is neither here nor there, because Mr. Thorpe is st...
Image via Pop2it
For the last three years, Heather Matarazzo---she starred in Welcome to the Dollhouse---has been engaged to her special friend, Caroline Murphy. And now that same-sex marriage is legal in New York state, the couple is really going to do it!
But not right away! They plan to take time in planning their nuptials. Caroline Murphy, to the AP: "I always wanted a wedding. Not a trip to City Hall."
One bride plans to wear a dress; the other bride, a white pantsuit, "but a sexy one." ...
Mike Tyson posted this photo to Twitter two days ago (via), along with the caption, "Moments like this make everything all worth it. Check out my young fan with my face tattoo."
Frankly, it was irresponsible of Tyson to post this photo. What if tattoo artist S. Victor Whitmill tries to sue the pants off this baby? (See also.)...
Yesterday afternoon, Vulture published the single funniest headline I've ever seen outside of the Onion ("Dave Chappelle Tells One Joke at Charity Event, Proceeds to Stare Down Audience"). Chappelle's awkward 53-minute set was hosted as part of ex-NBA player Alonzo Mourning's Summer Groove charity gala Friday night. The set bombed, and CNN analyst Roland S. Martin sat in the audience, livetweeting the whole mess.
Dave Chappelle somehow saw, and recognized, the CNN analyst in the crowd. "…Dave started...
On the latest episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, a very anxious Kim Kardashian visits a dermatologist to find out about the pink spots on her legs.
In the video, when Kim says, "Khloe seems to think I have ringworm," I initially went into a full-on WebMD panic, like, OH NO! Annular lesions are a symptom of Subacute Cutaneous Lupus Erythematosus! Also, syphilis!
But my panic lasted only a second, because then Kim pulls up her cuffed pantleg, and anyone with a genetic autoimmune disease...