Where's Michael Lohan, anyway? Last I heard, he was in solitary confinement---no joke!---where he'll fester until Wednesday.
In the meantime, Kate Major has been keeping herself busy! To start, she sat down with Dr. Drew, who was happy to help her air some of her business on national television. She dropped a bunch of bombshells during their interview, too, like:
- Michael Lohan is on steroids
- Michael Lohan has been shopping around a sex tape that Kate Major says she didn't know exi...
Here it is: Mariah Yeater's side of the story, in her own words. And boy, her interview definitely isn't the blast I was hoping it'd be. I don't know, I guess I assumed she would be more animated, more obviously desperate for fame; instead, Miss Yeater is just some scared kid.
When the interviewer pokes holes in her story, she only shakes her head and looks exhausted. The truth is, I can't read her. Is this an act? It has to be, right?
Interviewer: I have to be a little straightforward with you and tell you that… the security guard we talked to, he said that Justin went to the dressing room that night. He went into the dressing room, his mother was there, his hairstylist was there, his best friend was there. Then he came out of the dressing room. He was with him the whole time, they walked him to the car. Why would he say that?
Yeater: No comment.
The full interview airs tonight on The Insider. />
Here it is: Mariah Yeater's side of the story, in her own words. And boy, her interview definitely isn't the blast I was hoping it'd be. I don't know, I guess I assumed she would be more animated, more obviously desperate for fame; instead, Miss Yeater is just some scared kid.
When the interviewer pokes holes in her story, she only shakes her head and looks exhausted. The truth is, I can't read her. Is this an act? It has to be, right?
Interviewer: I have to be a little straightforward with you a...
Which test, you ask? Why, baby Tristyn Yeater's paternity test! And honestly, I'm a little shocked, because---I've said it before---I don't think the Biebz should even deign to acknowledge Mariah Yeater. I mean, even if Bieber does actually bang all his tween fans backstage (yawn), this Mariah Yeater character is pretty clearly nuts. I figure we should do our best to forget about her. Zzz.
All the same, Bieber is going the high road and taking that paternity test anyway, according to his lawyer. There's a method to Bieber's madness: onc...
Demi Lovato has been through a lot lately. And because I always applaud reinvention, I have to hand it to her brand new hair: she looks like Ariel. She does! It's very Feria, but I mean this in the nicest way.
Demi, if you're out there? Listen up: please drop that 31-year-old dead weight. You and your new fiery-red mane deserve so much better. This is Real Talk. And if dying your locks Manic Panic green is what it takes to muster all that resolve, by all means, do it, sister....
Here is a sad admission: I DON'T LAUGH THAT OFTEN. But this? This Saturday Night Live sketch from last night's episode? Oh, I belly-laughed. I may have even guffawed. It was terrible, and I'm sorry. Except for, Kris Jenner is kind of the worst ever, and boy oh boy, did I laugh at Kristen Wiig's version of Kris Jenner. Meanwhile, Andy Samberg's limited talents (sorry!) were perfectly utilized in his portrayal of Kris Humphries. Oh, my God, and then Taran Killam as Bruce Jenner. Oh, my God. Just watch. (Charlie Day hosted.)
No, I do feel bad for laughing. I feel awful, actually: Kim Kardashian has reportedly flown to Minnesota to love-tackle (that's a basketball term, right?) estranged husband Kris Humphries. Kim feels she was brash in ditching her husband of 72 days, evidently, and while this doesn't signal a real reconciliation, I'm actually relieved that Kim is at least sort of trying. />
Here is a sad admission: I DON'T LAUGH THAT OFTEN. But this? This Saturday Night Live sketch from last night's episode? Oh, I belly-laughed. I may have even guffawed. It was terrible, and I'm sorry. Except for, Kris Jenner is kind of the worst ever, and boy oh boy, did I laugh at Kristen Wiig's version of Kris Jenner. Meanwhile, Andy Samberg's limited talents (sorry!) were perfectly utilized in his portrayal of Kris Humphries. Oh, my God, and then Taran Killam as Bruce Jenner. Oh, my God. Jus...
I missed the last few episodes of "Kids React," and I'm still waiting for this Sunday's (they're weekly, and this week's isn't online yet). But maybe we really should take a look at last week's episode. I'm a child of the '80s and/or '90s, so I'm a sucker for "Very Special Episodes," you guys.
This time, instead of screening some awful Lady Gaga clip, the Fine Bros show their panel of kids that one viral video in which a larger, much abler teen---then-10th-grader Casey Heynes---violently plunks his comparatively runty tormentor onto the concrete.
Remember that video? It's maybe eight months old now, but damned if it didn't strike an ugly, vindictive chord in every adult geek I know. And I'll tell you the honest truth: I have that video saved to my laptop. I remember I felt conflicted in watching it, but I really was glad Heynes finally got his drop-kick in. (So this probably isn't a healthy or useful attitude to have, OK.)
Most episodes of "Kids React" are funny, but even when they aren't, they're always illuminating. And over the months, I've become really attached to some of these precocious little squirts. So when my favorite mouthy, tousled tow-head (Jake, now 12) talks about his own bullying experiences, it kind of drives a stake into my weak, pale little heart.
Read More />
I missed the last few episodes of "Kids React," and I'm still waiting for this Sunday's (they're weekly, and this week's isn't online yet). But maybe we really should take a look at last week's episode. I'm a child of the '80s and/or '90s, so I'm a sucker for "Very Special Episodes," you guys.
This time, instead of screening some awful Lady Gaga clip, the Fine Bros show their panel of kids that one viral video in which a larger, much abler teen---then-10th-grader Casey Heynes---violently plunks his comparatively runty tormentor onto the concrete.
Remembe...
She's done it yet again: somehow I'm still talking about Courtney Stodden. I don't know, you guys. Anytime I do, I hurt and offend myself.
This time, Courtney Stodden wants to prove to you that her magnificent rack is rill. (For a long time, I believed it was, actually, but these days? Eh.)
So get ready! Get set! Courtney has delegated none other than Dr. Drew Pinsky---the most credible medical authority around!---to help her prove to ye disbelieving masses that her gazoombas are genui...
The Anonymous Entertainment Lawyer at Crazy Days and Nights, who has a nose for these things, writes,
Which Jersey Shore star is fond of saying, "It is not gay if someone else is doing the sucking," whenever he is questioned about some of the people he has gone out with.
HA HA HA HA HA!
OK, I really have no idea who Enty is talking about here---but then again, there are only four dude castmembers on "Jersey Shore." So! If I were to make four guesses, 25% of my guesses would be correct. T...
Andy Rooney---the lovably cantankerous fogey best known for his commentaries on "60 Minutes"---has died. He was 92.
Last month, Rooney announced he would no longer contribute regularly to the newsmagazine. According to CBS, Rooney passed away Friday night from "complications following minor surgery."
From Rooney's final broadcast, which aired last month:
When I went on television, it was as a writer: I don't think of myself as a television personality. I'm a writer who reads what he's written.
People have often told me I said the things they were thinking themselves. I probably haven't said a...
Please. Please, please, pleasepleaseplease let this be true: Jennifer Lopez is slated to produce the upcoming Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego live-action movie, and she might even star.
Just ruminate on that one for a moment. (And as you do, here is some Thinking Music.)
Aside: a few years ago, I picked out a heavy, woolen trenchcoat at the Burlington Coat Factory. It was affordable, and I figured it would look super cute with thigh-high boots! As I took the coat to checkout, I spied the label: "JLO." Did I ultimately buy the coat? Abso-freaking-lutely.
Reasons Jennifer...
Well, well, well! I logged into the ol' photo-wire this morning, and imagine my delight to find the sad, cold eyes of one Mariah Yeater staring back at me.
Here's the accompanying caption (courtesy of Getty):
In this booking photo provided by the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department, Mariah Yeater, 20, poses for her mugshot after being arrrested [sic!] for Battery Domestic Violence, Injury/Destroying Property and Threatening Telephone Calls on December 21, 2010 in Las Vegas, Nevada. Yeat...
I'm not really interested in acting. […] I don't want there to be films. It's not like I'm looking for opportunities to do things. …I would like an opportunity to have a good sleep and get on with some writing.
---The enigmatic, somewhat-otherworldly Tilda Swinton, on how she totally plans to quit acting, you know, one of these days.
Anybody else, Tilda. If anybody else talked like this---anybody else---my eyes would roll so hard, they would roll right out of my head and down the stairs a...
Where's Michael Lohan, anyway? Last I heard, he was in solitary confinement---no joke!---where he'll fester until Wednesday.
In the meantime, Kate Major has been keeping herself busy! To start, she sat down with Dr. Drew, who was happy to help her air some of her business on national television. She dropped a bunch of bombshells during their interview, too, like:
- Michael Lohan is on steroids
- Michael Lohan has been shopping around a sex tape that Kate Major says she didn't know exi...
Which test, you ask? Why, baby Tristyn Yeater's paternity test! And honestly, I'm a little shocked, because---I've said it before---I don't think the Biebz should even deign to acknowledge Mariah Yeater. I mean, even if Bieber does actually bang all his tween fans backstage (yawn), this Mariah Yeater character is pretty clearly nuts. I figure we should do our best to forget about her. Zzz.
All the same, Bieber is going the high road and taking that paternity test anyway, according to his lawyer. There's a method to Bieber's madness: onc...
Demi Lovato has been through a lot lately. And because I always applaud reinvention, I have to hand it to her brand new hair: she looks like Ariel. She does! It's very Feria, but I mean this in the nicest way.
Demi, if you're out there? Listen up: please drop that 31-year-old dead weight. You and your new fiery-red mane deserve so much better. This is Real Talk. And if dying your locks Manic Panic green is what it takes to muster all that resolve, by all means, do it, sister....
She's done it yet again: somehow I'm still talking about Courtney Stodden. I don't know, you guys. Anytime I do, I hurt and offend myself.
This time, Courtney Stodden wants to prove to you that her magnificent rack is rill. (For a long time, I believed it was, actually, but these days? Eh.)
So get ready! Get set! Courtney has delegated none other than Dr. Drew Pinsky---the most credible medical authority around!---to help her prove to ye disbelieving masses that her gazoombas are genui...
The Anonymous Entertainment Lawyer at Crazy Days and Nights, who has a nose for these things, writes,
Which Jersey Shore star is fond of saying, "It is not gay if someone else is doing the sucking," whenever he is questioned about some of the people he has gone out with.
HA HA HA HA HA!
OK, I really have no idea who Enty is talking about here---but then again, there are only four dude castmembers on "Jersey Shore." So! If I were to make four guesses, 25% of my guesses would be correct. T...
Andy Rooney---the lovably cantankerous fogey best known for his commentaries on "60 Minutes"---has died. He was 92.
Last month, Rooney announced he would no longer contribute regularly to the newsmagazine. According to CBS, Rooney passed away Friday night from "complications following minor surgery."
From Rooney's final broadcast, which aired last month:
When I went on television, it was as a writer: I don't think of myself as a television personality. I'm a writer who reads what he's written.
People have often told me I said the things they were thinking themselves. I probably haven't said a...
Please. Please, please, pleasepleaseplease let this be true: Jennifer Lopez is slated to produce the upcoming Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego live-action movie, and she might even star.
Just ruminate on that one for a moment. (And as you do, here is some Thinking Music.)
Aside: a few years ago, I picked out a heavy, woolen trenchcoat at the Burlington Coat Factory. It was affordable, and I figured it would look super cute with thigh-high boots! As I took the coat to checkout, I spied the label: "JLO." Did I ultimately buy the coat? Abso-freaking-lutely.
Reasons Jennifer...
Well, well, well! I logged into the ol' photo-wire this morning, and imagine my delight to find the sad, cold eyes of one Mariah Yeater staring back at me.
Here's the accompanying caption (courtesy of Getty):
In this booking photo provided by the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department, Mariah Yeater, 20, poses for her mugshot after being arrrested [sic!] for Battery Domestic Violence, Injury/Destroying Property and Threatening Telephone Calls on December 21, 2010 in Las Vegas, Nevada. Yeat...
I'm not really interested in acting. […] I don't want there to be films. It's not like I'm looking for opportunities to do things. …I would like an opportunity to have a good sleep and get on with some writing.
---The enigmatic, somewhat-otherworldly Tilda Swinton, on how she totally plans to quit acting, you know, one of these days.
Anybody else, Tilda. If anybody else talked like this---anybody else---my eyes would roll so hard, they would roll right out of my head and down the stairs a...