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Matthew McConaughey Would Like the Bloggers to Stop Writing About How He’s Gay Please

August 27, 2006

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Matthew McConaughey, The Gays

This woman looks strangely like Teri Hatcher. Taking a cue from Ryan Seacrest, are we, Matty?

This woman looks strangely like Teri Hatcher. Taking a cue from Ryan Seacrest, are we, Matty? [ICYDK has more of this charade]...

Pirates of the Caribbean Sucked But You All Liked It So Here’s Pictures of the Third One Being Filmed

August 27, 2006

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Johnny Depp

The eight of you who followed the plot of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest will be relieved to know the filming of the third edition is in full swing out here in Los Angeles. I'd typically make some reference now to the cliffhanger at the end of the last one, and how it will be duly resolved, but after the investment of three hours of my life that I will never get back, I have absolutely no idea what happened in that movie. There was a sword fight on some manner of wheel and a Johnny Depp character better suited to The Birdcage, but everything else went right past me. But since most of the known world saw it anyway, I can't really blame Disney for trudging forward with another.
The eight of you who followed the plot of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest will be relieved to know the filming of the third edition is in full swing out here in Los Angeles. I'd typically make some reference now to the cliffhanger at the end of the last one, and how it will be duly resolved, but after the investment of three hours of my life that I will never get back, I have absolutely no idea what happened in that movie. There was a sword fight on some manner of wheel and a Johnny Depp...

Weekend Update: Black People Can’t Swim Edition

August 26, 2006

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Evil Clips, Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Simpson

Americans nationwide unite for the single purpose of helping CBS generate buzz for its upcoming season of Survivor: Racism, and the ever-observant Rush Limbaugh just wants to do his part to help. From E! Online: Hispanics, he said, "have shown a remarkable ability to cross borders" and "will do things other people won't do." Asians, per Limbaugh, are "the best at espionage, keeping secrets." Blacks "lack buoyancy" and are "more likely to drown," while the white man's burden will weigh down the last team with "guilt over the fact that they run things." I hope someone has thought to award this man an honorary Ph.D.
Douglas L. Hall has written a script for Angelina Jolie. Would you like to read it? Now you can, at www.myscriptforangelinajolie.com.
Jesse McCartney would like to take back what he said about Jennifer Lopez. If only he could do the same thing for the entirety of Summerland.
Check out this video of two Chinese students lip-syncing to Jessica Simpson's "A Public Affair." Pay special attention to the motionless kid in the background who quietly plays a first-person shooter game on his computer while his roommates sing their hearts out. Thanks to Anna for the link.

Americans nationwide unite for the single purpose of helping CBS generate buzz for its upcoming season of Survivor: Racism, and the ever-observant Rush Limbaugh just wants to do his part to help. From E! Online: Hispanics, he said, "have shown a remarkable ability to cross borders" and "will do things other people won't do." Asians, per Limbaugh, are "the best at espionage, keeping secrets." Blacks "lack buoyancy" and are "more likely to drown," while the white man's burden will weigh down the las...

Box-Office Hits for Your Weekend

August 26, 2006

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CaCee Cobb, Donald Faison, Evil Clips, Saved By The Bell Is Amazing

Just a few random clips I thought I'd leave for anyone who swings by this weekend.
Just a few random clips I thought I'd leave for anyone who swings by this weekend.Remember when Jessie Spano was abusing caffeine pills? Yes, you do. You reminisce about it at least once weekly with your friends. Unless you're one of the people who keeps showing up on this site searching for Cacee Cobb and Donald Faison, in which case you are 14 at best, and the only thing you know about Mark-Paul Gosselaar is that he died in a car accident at least 5 times before you finished elementary school.Speak...

More Odds & Ends: Vaginas Everywhere!

August 25, 2006

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American Idol, bridget grish, Harry Morton, Lindsay Lohan, SYTYCD

That girl with two vaginas? She has a blog now.
24-year-old fashion assistant Bridget Grish gets fired from Life & Style after her amateur porn videos show up on the web. There's a lesson in there somewhere, I'm sure of it.
Harry Morton -- La Lohan's latest squeeze -- wants to lend his Mexican-cum-vagina-themed restaurant's name, Pink Taco, to the Arizona Cardinals new stadium. There's an Arizona-Cardinals-are-pussies joke to be made here, but after writing the previous sentence, I'm in no mood to think it up.
No one wants to see the AmIdol tour. Which is surprising only when you consider that the So You Think You Can Dance tour is selling out most cities in minutes. Maybe next season they should divide the performers up by race.

/>That girl with two vaginas? She has a blog now. 24-year-old fashion assistant Bridget Grish gets fired from Life & Style after her amateur porn videos show up on the web. There's a lesson in there somewhere, I'm sure of it.Harry Morton -- La Lohan's latest squeeze -- wants to lend his Mexican-cum-vagina-themed restaurant's name, Pink Taco, to the Arizona Cardinals new stadium. There's an Arizona-Cardinals-are-pussies joke to be made here, but after writing the previous sentence, I'm in no mo...

Picking Up the Pieces

August 25, 2006

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Kate Moss, Katie Holmes, Lindsay Lohan, Pete Doherty, Tom Cruise

If you liked Mean Girls, you'll love Heathers 2. When William H. Macy goes on the record with how much you suck, Lindsay Lohan, you must totally suck. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have been lurking around the Yahoo/HBO complex in Santa Monica. They must have found a sitter for their little Suri. And by "sitter" I of course mean "fake sitter," and by "Suri" I of course mean "PR stunt." Since he can't marry Kate Moss just yet, Pete Doherty is passing the time by sneaking cocaine to teenagers in rehab...

JLo Preggers; Jesse McCartney Needs Additional Media Training

August 25, 2006

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Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Simpson, Kristin Cavalleri, Preggers

Let's start from the beginning: hottie Jesse McCartney is dating Katie Cassidy. Who is Katie Cassidy? For starters, she's David Cassidy's daughter, although I remember watching an MTV special about her fledgling singing career several years ago, and she had basically no relationship with her father other than him calling bi-monthly to urge her not to pursue a singing career. When the singing career eventually failed to pursue her, she must have gone into acting, as I hear she beat out the likes of...

Lunch Break Quickies

August 24, 2006

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CaCee Cobb, Donald Faison, Nicole Richie, Tom Cruise

Zach Braff thinks this season of Scrubs will be his last. Hey, you know who could step in as Donald Faison's replacement love interest? Cacee Cobb! [for those of you spelling-challenged googlers out there: fason, casey, cob, kasey, KC, casee, fison, feson, faizon]Nicole Richie walks into a bar. Stop the well-endowed singer of the Spores if you've heard this one before...Need to kick-start a buzz for the eight billionth season of your tiresome island-based reality show? Try racism!Tom Cruise officially too stupid for the studio that g...

Heidi Klum is Ridiculously Hot

August 24, 2006

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Boring Science, Heidi Klum

Also, as of this morning, Pluto is no longer a planet. A bunch of scientists who are way smarter than you are took a week off from pursuing passing fancies like curing cancer to bicker red-facedly in Prague over this matter. From Yahoo news:Although astronomers applauded after the vote, Jocelyn Bell Burnell â€” a specialist in neutron stars from Northern Ireland who oversaw the proceedings â€” urged those who might be "quite disappointed" to look on the bright side. "It could be argued tha...

Why Do You People Care So Much about Donald Faison & Cacee Cobb?

August 23, 2006

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CaCee Cobb, Donald Faison

It is truly a mystery to me, but you show up here in droves each day via search terms like "cacee & donald" or "cacee cobb and donald faison," and lord only knows how many of you would end up here if you spelled their names correctly. I guess I'm further out of touch than I'd believed; why anyone cares about these two individually or together eludes me.But anyway.E! Online's Lara Morgenson says they showed up hand-in-hand at Justin Timberlake's HOB show last week.So there you go. Cacee Cobb and...

Putting It All in Perspective

August 23, 2006

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Christina Aguilera, Clay Aiken, Jessica Simpson, Paris Hilton

Notable Amazon.com album rankings from today:
Notable Amazon.com album rankings from today:1. Christina Aguilera, Back to Basics [I LOVE YOU XTINA!]2. Danity Kane, Danity Kane [Yup, that's Diddy's all-girl group from yet another interminable cycle of Making the Band. Today, as the title says, we are putting things in perpective.]...7. Dixie Chicks, Taking the Long Way [Didn't that one lead singer chick say something mean about Texas? Or the Pope? It was something like that.]...10. Clay Aiken, A Thousand Different Ways [insert multiple-penetrat...