My asshole boyfriend married Fat-Arms on Necker Island in the Caribbean this weekend. The two got engaged in August, much to my dismay.
Normally I'd take this opportunity to go on a cute little rant about Fat-Arms and her fat arms and how Jimmy Fallon should be mine but I'm just too depressed right now to even do that.
Will I never get the guy? ...
Kevin Federline (sporting a mohawk?) and Brody Jenner partied at LAX in Vegas on Saturday night, where they chilled with Paris and Nicky Hilton.
What a black hole of stupid.
Image via Splash...
Nicky Hilton was on board to host at PURE last night, and Orange Paris came along for the ride, and decided to give the paps an impromptu photo shoot.
I swear in one of these pictures it looks like she's posing while in line for the bathroom.
This is kind of random, but whenever people find out what I do for a living, they regale me with their celeb encounter stories. I particularly enjoy this when these storytellers begin by acting disdainful about what I do for a living, and mention ...
So Mischa pulled out of her hosting gig at CatHouse last night at the last minute -- because of, ya know, that whole DUI thing -- but they went ahead and opened anyway.
And who the hell needs Mischa Barton when you have Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz???
Also there: Jamie King, who got hitched to director Kyle Newman in November, and who'd sure as hell better be pregnant if she doesn't want me to talk shit about that weight gain. ...
The 24-year-old singer is reportedly expecting her second child with her husband, bassist Teddy Landau, 43.
They already have a daughter, Owen Isabelle, born in 2005.
Wow, a planned pregnancy with a husband?
That is so last year. ...
...
Meet Adnan Ghalib, the paparazzo who's reportedly banging Britney Spears. Adnan was spotted hiding in the back of Britney's Mercedes early yesterday morning, making this the third time he's been spotted with her in a non-professional manner.
I guess, when you think about it, it's almost weird that more celebs don't end up dating paparazzi. I mean, they practically spend more time with them than anyone else. It's a convenient relationship. ...
Which new Hollywood BFFs didn't want their picture taken as they drove through an LA McDonalds?
Jump inside for the answer!
Images via WENN
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This DUI may be the nail in the coffin of Mischa's career.
Her management team pulled her from hosting Saturday night's opening of Cathouse in Las Vegas. "Mischa can't give interviews on the red carpet or deal with the press right now," said a Vegas source, "so they told her she can't do the event."
The club was searching for celebrities available at the last minute but was still looking last night.
Ha ha. I hear Tara Reid's schedule is pretty open these days. And sometimes she e...
Another gym shot. But damn this is a good shot of the bump.
You know, the crotch shot galleries and the nip slip galleries drive a good deal of traffic around here, and it's so funny to me to watch the traffic patterns and see people flipping through those pics again and again and again. Like, "What is so infinitely interesting about Britney Spears' vagina?" But then I see this amazing pic of Jessica Alba's baby bump and I pretty much get all wet, and I'm like, "Oh, this is how most people ...
Who's this shy little creature?
She stopped by a liquor store in WeHo today and left with a case of Corona.
Jump in for the answer.
Images via Splash
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In case anyone cares.
Their divorce was official on Thursday.
Now Manson is free to make an honest woman of his 12-year-old girlfriend, Evan Rachel Wood. (I kid, I kid. She's a full 20 years old. Manson is 38.) And Dita is free to find someone who deserves her luscious ass. ...