Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Well This Is Age-Appropriate

paris_bday.jpg Paris Hilton celebrates her 27th birthday by demonstrating the maturity it's been such a joy to watch her grow into. And I know I've been MIA lately, guys. I know posts haven't been as prompt or frequent as they usually are. No, I'm not ditching you for a boyfriend or a new job, I promise. Without going into too much detail, I've kind of been going through a little crisis in my personal life the past month or so, culminating in a fantastic Britney-style breakdown this weekend (no umbrella...

Lindsay Lohan: Off the Wagon and Lovin’ It!

lindsay_ew.jpg We didn't really think our girl Lindsay was gonna stay sober for long, now did we? Let the games begin! Rush & Molloy reports that she's already back to her drunken, slutty antics. Lindsay Lohan was working her charms as she fluttered back and forth between Adrian Grenier and Leonardo DiCaprio Tuesday night at a West Hollywood club. LiLo at first gravitated to Grenier, pulling off her red leather jacket and pulling him onto the dance floor. But when the girl he came with reclaimed th...

Bai Ling Blames Shoplifting Arrest on Breakup

bai_ling1.jpg America's favorite transplanted headcase, Bai Ling, was arrested earlier this week for shoplifting at LAX. Why did she need to steal $16 worth of celeb mags and batteries, you ask? The stress of breaking up with her boyfriend right before Valentines Day. The 37-year-old actress and scenester exclusively tells E! News that she split with her new boyfriend Wednesday before she was scheduled to fly from LAX to New Mexico to begin shooting a film, turning it into an "emotionally crazy"...

Gary Coleman Still Hasn’t Fucked His Wife of Six Months

Okay, so we didn't really cover the whole thing where Gary Coleman was all like "Hey guys! I got married awhile back!" because it was a dumb story and Gary Coleman is dumb. But this is just too good to pass up. Gary told The Insider that he still hasn't had sex with his 22-year-old bride. He says it'll happen when it's meant to happen, and for all the right reasons. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. It'll never happen, dude. /> Okay, so we didn't really cover the whole thing where Gary Coleman was all like "Hey guys! I got married awhile back!" because it was a dumb story and Gary Coleman is dumb. But this is just too good to pass up. Gary told The Insider that he still hasn't had sex with his 22-year-old bride. He says it'll happen when it's meant to happen, and for all the right reasons. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. It'll never happen, dude. ...

Britney’s Dad Will Retain Conservatorship

A court today decided that Britney Spears' father will retain his conservatorship over his daughter until the next hearing on March 10. An attorney for Spears' father also told the court that investigators have spent over 200 hours trying find the Britney Spears' sometime manager and friend Sam Lutfi to serve him with court papers. The commissioner agreed to reissue a temporary restraining order against Lutfi if he is not served soon. Go get 'em, Papa Spears!!! />...