Check out these pics InTouch snapped of Jen and John getting all lovey-dovey in Miami this weekend. What is that thing on the wall in front of them? I bet it's a mirror, so they can admire themselves as they canoodle and be like, "Damn, we're so hot."...

I became a member of RealityWanted.com in order to get all the info on the Paris Hilton casting drama, and now I get regular emails about upcoming reality casting calls. And most of the time they are hilarious. I mean, sometimes they're just looking to do fashion makeovers or interviews with real estate agents or something equally boring, but a lot of the time I read these and I'm like "Who the hell in their right mind is actually going to respond to this?" So I'm starting a new segment called "Casting Call," where I will bring you the best and brightest of these soon-to-be reality gems. Up first:

Are you a mother who needs a little help just to get by? Do you HAVE to have a drink during the day just to cope with your life? Do you sometimes take more of your medication than you should because you've had a bad day? Do you ever do illegal drugs to help you stay sane? If you need a little pick me up to get through the day, we want to hear your story. If you are interested in talking about your experience, please send me an email for more information.

So: if you're a shitty mother who wants the whole world to know about your active drug problem, making certain that your kids will be called "crack-baby" on the playground, click here for more info. />I became a member of RealityWanted.com in order to get all the info on the Paris Hilton casting drama, and now I get regular emails about upcoming reality casting calls. And most of the time they are hilarious. I mean, sometimes they're just looking to do fashion makeovers or interviews with real estate agents or something equally boring, but a lot of the time I read these and I'm like "Who the hell in their right mind is actually going to respond to this?" So I'm starting a new segment called "...

Everyone's talking about this clip from last night's AmIdol. I have no idea why. Like, Paula said something that indicates she hasn't really been paying attention to anything in the past half-hour? Jesus, people, Paula Abdul hasn't really been paying attention to anything in the past decade. Because she's a drug addict! And she's stupid on top of that! Why is this suddenly a big deal? And how the fuck is Brooke White still in this competition? It's because every girl under the age of 16 wishes she were their big sister. And every guy over the age of 12 imagines he will be the one to corrupt her. It is not because she has a good voice, or can, ya know, remember lyrics. /> Everyone's talking about this clip from last night's AmIdol. I have no idea why. Like, Paula said something that indicates she hasn't really been paying attention to anything in the past half-hour? Jesus, people, Paula Abdul hasn't really been paying attention to anything in the past decade. Because she's a drug addict! And she's stupid on top of that! Why is this suddenly a big deal? And how the fuck is Brooke White still in this competition? It's because every girl under the age...

Vanilla Ice's wife, Laura Van Winkle, recanted her original statement that her husband had physically abused her. She now says any physical contact was accidental. So prosecutors will not be moving forward with the case. Shit, dude, I hope any sexual contact she has with him is accidental too. I can't imagine who would walk to sleep with this washed-up freakazoid. I'm sure from here on out it will be all roses and happiness in this relationship. Because a guy who beats you up once is definitely going to feel very sorry and ne...

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden had lunch today at a restaurant in Beverly Hills called Prego. Oh dear Lord. Please let this be the first and last time I use "Paris Hilton" and "Prego" in the same sentence. Unless the headline is "BREAKING: Doctors Confirm Paris Hilton Is Infertile!" [Image via Splash]...

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Damn! Ashley Olsen actually gives us a wide grin at the Everywhere At Once screening in NYC. I don't think I've seen her smile that big since she was playing Michelle. She looks really great in all the pics from this event, actually. She seems happy, and less, ya know, tortured than usual. More pics of Ashley from this event are after the jump. Read More...

After the CSI star physically assaulted a TMZ photog last summer, they were all too happy to report that Gary Dourdan was busted yesterday in Palm Springs for possession of -- ready for this? -- heroin, cocaine, ecstasy and prescription drugs. People still do ecstasy? That's, like, so late-'90s to me. Did you remember to bring your glow sticks and lollipops too, Gary? Were you wearing your JNCO jeans when they got you? Anyway, Gary was taken to the Palm Springs jail, where he posted ...

Well, after Ashley Dupre sued Joe Francis and GGW for illegal use of her name and image, Joe Francis has produced a video tape of a 17-year-old Dupre stating that she was 18, and video tape of the fake ID she showed them. Video is here. The ID is oh-so-obviously a fake, but I'm not sure how that works out in a courtroom. Also check out the super-fake Southern accent she's sporting. About as believable as her ID. ...

So someone decided to take photos of Amy Smart on the set of Crank 2: High Voltage (There was a Crank 1? Never heard of it. Probably because they neglected to leak photos of Amy Smart's breasts during the filming.) She's got black tape over the nipples, and she's wearing super-sexy red hot pants. But still. Hot pic. Anyway, I'm gonna get an angry letter from Lionsgate about this in T-12 hours or so, so download it while you can. Pic is after the jump. Read More...

In fairness, it's only been like two days, but I'm already so sick of everyone and their brother weighing in on the Miley Cyrus cover of Vanity Fair. A source tells ET that her father, Billy Ray Cyrus, is furious about the pics, and did not consent to them being taken. Our source is adamant that he would never have agreed to that set up and that he only left the photo shoot after his portion was complete that day because he had a prior commitment. In addition, ET has learned that he was not shown those specific shots before they were selected...