HAPPY TUESDAY!!!! BRITNEY SPEARS IS GOING TO COURT TODAY!!! All signs point to Britney actually showing up to her child custody hearing in LA today. OMG I am so, so excited. Now that I have cable TV, I just want to invite all my friends over to sit in my living room and eat chips and dip and watch the coverage on CNN. Because you better fucking believe this shit is gonna be on CNN. It's the biggest story of the year so far! YOU BETTER SHOW UP, BRITNEY! YOU WILL RUIN MY TUESDAY IF YOU DITCH...

I found it! She refused to show off her new engagement ring to most of the photo agencies, but it looks like Splash News got a pic of it. How much you wanna bet some money exchanged hands to make that happen? It's nice and all. Nothing stunning, IMHO. I do kind of dig the heavy glitter on her hands though. It's a cute, girlie touch. I'm sure she's way excited. [Image via ... you guessed it ... Splash]...

Scarlett Johansson was supposed to be showing off her new engagement ring at the Met's costume ball tonight, but she totally fucked it all up! She's got her arm behind Stefano Gabbanna in every single red carpet pic! I wonder who's getting the exclusives on this ... And Beyonce? Totally ringless. Assholes. ...

OMG this is like my favorite event of the YEAR!!! I would have written this post earlier, except the cable man came today to install cable and my new DVR, and it was like a precious angel descended from heaven in the form of a very friendly large black man and made it possible, for the first time in four months, for me to watch television efficiently again. Oh, joy joy joy! Watching House for the first time in four months is like having your husband return from Iraq. I feel whole again, like my best friend has come back into my life after a long and painful absence. So anyway. Let's get to the dresses, shall we???? I'll start with the best, then move on to the worst, and all the rest are in thumbnails after the jump. THE BEST OMG this is like my favorite event of the YEAR!!! I would have written this post earlier, except the cable man came today to install cable and my new DVR, and it was like a precious angel descended from heaven in the form of a very friendly large black man and made it possible, for the first time in four months, for me to watch television efficiently again. Oh, joy joy joy! Watching House for the first time in four months is like having your husband return from Iraq. I feel whole again, like my ...

What's the verdict? Is there genuine chemistry here? />...

Remember the old days when Mariah was getting a little on the chunky side? Not anymore! Mariah rocks her hot bod for the new issue of Vibe magazine, and she looks amazing! You know one thing I love about Mariah? She's almost always smiling in her photographs, looking like she's having fun, not giving the camera some angry pout or serious face, like all the young female celebrities these days. It's endearing. Meanwhile, Vibe's associate editor is busy talking about the chemistry (...

It's official! Scarlett's rep has confirmed the engagement, saying that "they're both thrilled." Scarlett's expected to debut her ring tonight, at the Metropolitan Museum Costume Institute Gala in New York. We'll have the pics as soon as they exist, of course. Ryan was, you'll recall, previously engaged to Alanis Morissette, who I certainly hope will be writing some sort of angsty ditty about this bullshit. I hope it's called "I've Released Seven Goddamn Albums and Not a Single One of Them Has Con...

Which newly minted TV star is a pushover who already looks ready for rehab? At an L.A. party, the actor was mocked into doing a bunch of shots, despite protesting numerous times that he had to drive that night.

[source] />...

We're starting to hear rumors that Brad and Angelina will get married on Paul Allen's yacht in France, sometime very soon. But, ya know, we always hear these kinds of rumors. Stay tuned. />...

Here's Brad with little Pax Thien -- whose hair is getting rather long -- playing on the beach in France. Damn, Brad, if you have to be all the way in France, the least you could do is go to a nude beach to have your picture taken. [Image via Splash]...

“You don’t know how many people came up to me when I was making the movie and said, ‘So is somebody going to die?’ Yup. Happy summer. Thanks for your $10. Enjoy your Diet Coke. Someone’s going to die. Like that’s what I’m going to do.” Michael Patrick King, the writer and director of the Sex and the City movie, to the New York Times. The whole interview's worth a read. It's here. ...

OMG. So much to talk about in this photo. First, the basics: Bai Ling totally wiped out in the ocean after kayaking at Pink's house. Mystery #1: What was Bai Ling doing at Pink's house? And kayaking? Then, she was pulled from the water by her boyfriend, music producer Damon Elliott (this is Dionne Warwick's son). Mystery #2: So she's back with Damon Elliott? She blamed her February shoplifting arrest at LAX on her break-up from him, saying that it had her all stressed out. When...