"I'm happy that she's out of my life."
Jon Gosselin, responding to Kate Major's tirade against him with a short and simple bitch-slap. BAM! Bitch goes down! I wonder if Star will give her her job back. ...
I'm trying to decide what my favorite moment of the Teen Choice Awards was. Fox actually cut one of my favorite moments, where Dane Cook asked where Vanessa Hudgens was, she raised her hand, and then he told her she needed to put some clothes on. It's in the clip above. Ahhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha! OMG that's so funny, Dane! Get it? Because she's had naked photo scandals twice now? I can't think of a wittier approach to the situation. I love this clip not because it disses Vanessa (I don't really care about that), but because it makes Dane Cook look like the lame douche that he is.
My other favorite is the clip below, where Miley Cyrus practically confesses her desire to lick Britney Spears' feet as she presents her with the Ultimate Lord of the Universe and All of Time and Space and Malibu surfboard, and then Britney comes on stage with half a broom stuck on top of her head and runs away from Miley as quickly as possible. She then mumbles like two sentences into the microphone as quickly as she possibly can and gets offstage as fast as possible, like her Xanax is going to turn into a pumpkin if she doesn't take it before midnight. In fairness: her legs look amazing the whole time.
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I'm trying to decide what my favorite moment of the Teen Choice Awards was. Fox actually cut one of my favorite moments, where Dane Cook asked where Vanessa Hudgens was, she raised her hand, and then he told her she needed to put some clothes on. It's in the clip above. Ahhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha! OMG that's so funny, Dane! Get it? Because she's had naked photo scandals twice now? I can't think of a wittier approach to the situation. I love this clip not because it disses Vanessa (I don't really care about that), but because i...
First off, let me say this: Miley Cyrus was not pole-dancing at the Teen Choice Awards last night (the actual show airs tonight). But unless Fox opts to cut away for the part around 1:08 in the above video, that's all anyone's going to be talking about tomorrow. Let me tell you what I assume happened: Miley was supposed to ride around the stage in that stupid pushcart and maybe do a few dance moves. The pole was on the pushcart so she didn't fall off. Miley got on the pushcart, grabbed the pole, and immediately started to grind on it, almost like a reflex. Then she heard the audience's reaction and she was like, "Oh, shit, I shouldn't be grinding on a pole at the Teen Choice Awards. I should save that shit for Nick. Or Justin. Or whoever I'm sleeping with right now. I forget. Bradley Cooper's pretty hot. Wait? Where am I?" and by the time that little reverie was over she was already off the pushcart.
Guarantee you that little move wasn't in the original choreography.
Still. I ::heart:: this girl so much. Years and years of fun, she's gonna be. />
First off, let me say this: Miley Cyrus was not pole-dancing at the Teen Choice Awards last night (the actual show airs tonight). But unless Fox opts to cut away for the part around 1:08 in the above video, that's all anyone's going to be talking about tomorrow. Let me tell you what I assume happened: Miley was supposed to ride around the stage in that stupid pushcart and maybe do a few dance moves. The pole was on the pushcart so she didn't fall off. Miley got on the pushcart, grabbed the pole, and immediately started to gr...
Update: Photos removed upon request via angry letter from lawyers.
Update: Photos removed upon request via angry letter from lawyers.
Welcome to full-blown famous, Ashley Greene! Nude pictures of the Twilight starlet hit the 'net this morning, at around the same time as photos of her making out with Chace Crawford in a limo hit the web. Everything's coming up Ashley Greene today! We may have a full-blown A-lister on our hands soon if she keeps up at this pace. I mean, it sure helps to have an international blockbuster under your belt, but nothing says "ub...
Their PR chick sent 'em over, and some of them are pretty sexy. Except for the one Scott Baio's in. But please check out the one of Shaq, whose right hand basically spans the length of some chick's torso.
I was just thinking about this tonight. You know, I'm tired of people saying there's no way to tell how big a guy's penis is until you get his pants off. There's pretty much a direct relationship between hand/foot size and penis size. Like, I'd say you can predict with about 95% certainty h...
Normally I would rather squat down on Robertson Blvd and pee in the middle of the day than use a photo stamped with Perez Hilton's logo, but in this case I'm making an exception. Jaime Pressly squatted down on Robertson Blvd and peed in the middle of the day after drinking heavily at gay hot-spot The Abbey on Sunday. Yes, people got pictures. One is above.
Let me say something about this that perhaps Perez Hilton doesn't know -- the women's bathroom at The Abbey is a fucking joke. There ar...
I'm not sure exactly what went down toward the end of Tracy Morgan's 23-year marriage to Sabina Morgan, but, whatever it was, it was a deal-breaker, ladies. The couple have been separated since 2001, but it looks like they finally decided they couldn't make it work. Tracy filed for divorce from his high-school sweetheart in a Bronx court on Friday. The couple have three sons.
You'll recall that Tracy's been busted for DUI twice in the past few years, and now claims to be clean and sober. Sti...
Look you guys! Jon Gosselin is FIGHTING FIRE WITH FIRE by TAKING PHOTOS OF THE PAPARAZZI. Oh my God they HATE it when you do that. It gets them SO RILED UP. I mean, the resultant photos are FUCKING GOLD to them, which is SO ANNOYING. Oh, Jon. You are such a witty man.
I want to know more about the friend towering over Jon, making him look like the long-lost Little Rascal. I have such a weird thing for guys with shaved heads -- especially when they've obviously shaved their heads because ...
I guess this isn't just a date or two -- Renee Zellweger and Hangover hottie Bradley Cooper were spotted arriving at the airport together in Spain, where they were picked up and whisked off by a waiting car. A Spanish holiday already? Dayum. But maybe that's not such a big deal when you're ridiculously rich and famous and needing to put as much distance as possible between yourself and Jennifer Aniston.
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I thought of that title because it's a game I play with my dog, who is also named Leo. I pull down his ears so that they cover his eyes, and then I say "Where is Leo? PEEK-A-BOO!" But unlike a delighted and amused human child, Leo jerks away and then looks at me like "WHAT THE FUCK YOU CRAZY BITCH I CAN'T SEE WHEN YOU DO THAT."
Anyway.
LeoNARDO was playing peek-a-boo with the paps yesterday, who are chasing him as he's trying to vacation on the Spanish island of Formentera. I was original...
Listen. It's been a really shitty summer. Not just in the celebrity world, but it feels like in my own world, among my friends, there have been a slew of sudden deaths and sudden break-ups. Isn't summer supposed to be about health and love? It's not feeling like that at all this summer. Is this just me or have your summers been better? I'm personally ready for summer to be over -- I feel like I'm limping through August at this point. I feel so drained. I hope autumn brings better tidings.
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