Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Alba Cashes In

She may not have wanted the paps to take pictures of her while she was pregnant, but she sure is willing to cash in on the first photos of her new baby! Jessica Alba is getting $1.5M from OK! magazine for the first photos of her daughter, Honor Marie. That's half of what they paid Matthew McConaughey! I wonder if Jessica knew that when she settled on a price. She's probably pissed now and realizes she could have held out for more. And what's with OK! and all the baby pics? It's li...

Lifetime Gives Carson Kressley Talk Show the Thumbs-Up

Remember Carson Kressley, the main gay from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy? That show that was popular back when we, as a nation, were celebrating our realization that gay people can be on television and it'll be okay? I remember I had a huge crush on Kyan from that show. I thought he was just the hottest thing ever. I have this problem with falling in love with gay men. I can't help it that they're so damn hot. Anyway one of my coworkers (this was back when I had an office job) emailed me a...

Joe Jonas and Taylor Swift?

Is this the hot new up-and-coming couple? Evil Beet sources report that Joe Jonas (of the Jonas Brothers) is now dating Taylor Swift. She joined the guys on tour in Dallas last night and will be hitting up Anaheim with them as well. Why do you care? I'll tell you. First of all, because, aside from Taylor Momsen, Taylor Swift is definitely my #1 underage girl-crush. So that should be reason enough. But I really want Taylor to be a huge star and a relationship with Joe Jonas could h...

A-Rod Was Emotionally Cheating on Wife with Madonna

So now A-Rod's wife is all like, "My husband didn't have sex with Madonna, but he was in love with her." Basically, The Sun says she's denying that his affair with her was sexual, but basically accuses him of emotional cheating. Cynthia Rodriguez says she has copies of text messages sent between Madge and A-Rod, and a source says the messages "were instrumental in convincing her that he was besotted. The messages could be released if things get really ugly." My British-to-Americanese translator thinks that "besotted" means "in love" or "crushing." British readers, ...

Quotables

"I think Jesse Jackson, he's the biggest player hater. His time is up. All you old niggas, time is up. We heard your voice, we saw your marching, we heard your sermons. We don't wanna hear that shit no more. It's a new day. It's a new voice. I'm here now. We don't need Jesse; I'm here. I got this. We got Barack, we got David Banners and Young Jeezys. We're the voice now. It's no more Jesse. Sorry. Goodbye. You ain't helping nobody in the 'hood. That's the bottom line. Goodbye, Jesse. Bye!" R...

Isla Fisher Would Rather Be a Star Than a Jew

Oy vey! Trouble abounds in Borat-ville! Sacha Baron Cohen was supposed to get hitched to baby mama Isla Fisher this summer, but that'll have to be postponed, because Isla's been slacking on all the studying she needs to do to convert to Judaism. She's doing it "part-time," apparently, but her "full-time" job is filming Confessions of a Shopaholic. It doesn't seem like Sacha's too concerned about this, but you know who is? HIS JEWISH MOTHER. Oh, yes. Says a source: "Isla was supposed to spend her time after givi...