Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Katie Holmes is a Woman on a Mission

You will all wear peg-and-roll jeans this season. You must. Katie will see to it. Do you think it's possible that there's a secret coded message here? Maybe somewhere in the creases of the roll is encoded directions for freeing her from the prison Tom locks her up in at night? That's the only way this makes sense to me. I've never seen Katie so passionate about a fashion trend before. This is a cry for help, you guys. ...

Scotty’s Ashes Don’t Quite Make It Into Orbit

I don't know why I'm so genuinely sad about this, but I am. Like, reading it hurt my little evil heart. Actor James Doohan -- who played Scotty on Star Trek -- was one of 208 people whose ashes were supposed to be sent out to orbit in space following Saturday's launch of Spacex's Falcon 1. Unfortunately, there were technical problems with the rocket, and flight contact was lost only three minutes into the flight. So his ashes never made it into orbit. This is the third failed atte...

Still Going Strong!

It's rare that we see them out in public together, but Jerry Seinfeld cozied up to his wife of nearly nine years, Jessica, at a luncheon she co-hosted in Amagansett, New York. You know, I totally didn't know this, but I just read that Jessica Seinfeld (nee Sklar) had just returned home to New York from a three-week honeymoon in Italy with her first husband when she met Jerry at the gym. She promptly divorced the guy she'd just married to be with Jerry. Ouch! That's pretty dirty, yo. I was never a b...

Lauren Conrad Is Totally Emmy Material

Heh. It looks like Lauren Conrad will be at a presenter at this year's Emmy awards. No, wait, it gets worse. The models who hand out the awards? Will be wearing dresses from Lauren's clothing line. Heidi and Spencer must be furious. But I can live with this, as long as Lauren Conrad does not, at any point, actually win an Emmy. I mean, do you think she could submit herself for Best Costume Director for her work on The Hills? ...

MKO Talks Back

As rumors swirled Monday morning that Mary-Kate Olsen was being uncooperative with DEA agents -- and implying that she may have been responsible for selling him the OxyContin that contributed to his overdose (I like how I say this as though I weren't one of the people spreading the rumor) -- Mary-Kate's lawyer was quick to fight back. "Despite tabloid speculation, Mary-Kate Olsen has nothing whatsoever to do with the drugs found in Heath Ledger's home or his body, and does not know where he...

The Full Jolie-Pitt Clan People Magazine Spread!

It's here! It's here! I finally tracked down the Special! Double! Issue! of People magazine, with Knox Leon Jolie-Pitt and Vivienne Marcheline Jolie-Pitt, along with the rest of the clan. How freakishly adorable is this whole clan? Even Pax is turning into a hottie. I swear, Angelina has a sixth sense for choosing babies who will grow up to be stunningly gorgeous. All the shots from the mag are after the jump. Enjoy! Read More...

The Fastest Way to a Man’s Heart Is Through a Late-Night Car Wreck with Your Drunken Co-Star

Remember Isabel Lucas? She's the young woman who was with Shia LaBeouf when he got into his now-infamous DUI car wreck. She's also Adrian Grenier's girlfriend. But, as it turns out, she wasn't his only girlfriend ... until now? It turns out Adrian and Isabel weren't totally exclusive. Adrian had been seeing model Melissa Keller on the side, and, on the night of the accident, he was with Melissa at her 30th birthday party in Echo Park. "It was a really small group, he was chatting with her pare...

Verne Troyer and Sex-Tape Parter: Separated at Last

Could this drama finally be nearing an end? Verne Troyer announced that his nemesis, former girlfriend, and sex-tape partner, Ranae Shrider -- who leaked the footage of the two doing the nasty -- has finally moved out of the house they shared. "Yeah, she's already moved out," he confirmed to E! recently. This makes me so sad, because what if I never have another excuse to run this photo? Maybe I'll just run it on occasion anyway. On slow news days. To put a smile on everyone's face. Th...