Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Sarah Palin Speaks at the Republican National Convention

Eh, you have to admit, she's quite likable when she's talking, and she's got that whole adorable Tina Fey look going on and that cute little Alaskan accent. Another observation: between Bristol "Juneau" Palin and her hottie boyfriend, Meghan and Cindy McCain and Sarah Palin's hot librarian look, this has gotta be one of the most physically attractive Presidential tickets in the history of the United States. I mean, the Obama camp has Michelle, who is admittedly quite beautiful, but can she really hold up all alone against the sheer photogenicism of the McCain/Palin ticket? I can't help but think that McCain must have taken all this into consideration as he was choosing Palin -- the McCain and Palin families standing together, well, they sure do look pretty. And I have to make yet another observation -- I know many (not all!) of you are fond of getting chatty in the comments about how I should stay away from politics because I don't know anything about it. And I'll happily admit to the latter. I don't know much about politics at all. But you know what, motherfuckers? I'm an adult citizen of the United States who has never been convicted of a felony (thanks to my awesome lawyers!!) and my totally uninformed ass can march to the polling center and vote however I damn well want, and it will count every bit as much as Bill Clinton's or Karl Rove's or your vote in the general election. And you know what else, motherfuckers? Most people in this country know even less about politics than I do. They have their opinions -- either deeply or loosely held -- about things like gay marriage and stem cell research and the war in Iraq and Roe v. Wade or whatever, but, when it comes down to it, they understand the short- and long-reaching impact of economic and foreign and domestic policy decisions even less than I do. But you know what's super duper funny? Their vote counts! Yes! It does! Just as much as yours, Mr. Genius Political Ingenue Who Occasionally Enjoys Leaving Unpleasant Comments on Celebrity Gossip Blogs. So, frankly, the fact that my understanding of politics -- or lack thereof -- is representative of the majority of Americans actually makes my opinions more valuable than the opinions of people who know big words and important-sounding phrases and statistics and history and read The Economist and whatnot. Because I'm going to make my decision based entirely on what I see and hear and think on the surface, because I'm not equipped with the economic, historical or international framework to delve a whole lot deeper than that. And that makes me unique among American voters only to the extent that I am willing to admit that publicly. That's kind of one of the grotesque beauties of politics in a functional democracy: I don't have to know what I'm talking about for my opinion to matter more than the people who do know what they're talking about. I'm just saying. /> Eh, you have to admit, she's quite likable when she's talking, and she's got that whole adorable Tina Fey look going on and that cute little Alaskan accent. Another observation: between Bristol "Juneau" Palin and her hottie boyfriend, Meghan and Cindy McCain and Sarah Palin's hot librarian look, this has gotta be one of the most physically attractive Presidential tickets in the history of the United States. I mean, the Obama camp has Michelle, who is admittedly quite beautiful, but can she ...

Alicia Sacramone Punching Some Dude in the Face

Sick of politics? Then sit back and enjoy this lovely video of Olympic gymnast and all-around hottie Alicia Sacramone punching a guy in the face at Brown University. /> Sick of politics? Then sit back and enjoy this lovely video of Olympic gymnast and all-around hottie Alicia Sacramone punching a guy in the face at Brown University. ...

Jamie-Lynn Spears Sent Baby Gifts to Bristol Palin???

A spokesperson for Petit Tresor is reporting that teen mom Jamie-Lynn Spears wanted to give Bristol Palin a little support while she's taking heat these days. The 17-year-old “Zoey 101” star and new mom sent a gift of $60 pink burp cloths to the pregnant, unwed, 17-year-old daughter of vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin -- and along with it, a message of teen mom solidarity. A spokesperson for Petit Tresor, the Los Angeles baby boutique from which the gift was bought, told AB...

Britney’s Coming Back to the VMAs!!!

They're giving her a second chance! Britney Spears has confirmed that she will open the VMAs once again this year -- although in what capacity, it's not clear. "MTV has long played an important role in my career. How can I not be there to kick off their 25th VMAs?" says Brit in a statement. "I'm excited to open the entire show, to say hi to my fans and to be nominated." Okay, Britney. It's been a year. A lot of shit's gone down, but everyone still seems to be rooting for you. Don't fuck this up. ...

Uh, Dude … Your Mic’s On

It's always fun when the talking heads don't realize they're being recorded and let you know what they really think. Here are two conservative commentators on MSNBC talking about Sarah Palin -- when they think nobody's listening. Thanks Rebecca! /> It's always fun when the talking heads don't realize they're being recorded and let you know what they really think. Here are two conservative commentators on MSNBC talking about Sarah Palin -- when they think nobody's listening. Thanks Rebecca!...

Lily Allen and Elton John Catfight at GQ Awards

It looks like Elton John got a little fed up with Lily's drunken antics last night as the twosome co-hosted the GQ awards in London. The music veteran called out the 23-year-old pop singer for swearing and slurring her way through her dialogue as she drank champagne, according to the Times. "What, you are going to have another drink?" John asked. That's when the real cat fight got under way. "F--- off, Elton," Allen responded, while celebs like TV chef Gordon Ramsay, producer Mark Ronson, actress Thandie New...

Even Joe Francis Is Getting on the Heidi Montag Train

Joe Francis' new assistant? Holly Montag, sister to Heidi. "His last assistant quit," said our insider. "And Joe aggressively sought out Holly to work for him." Another source told us, "She's running his life." Francis - who will do battle on "Celebrity Apprentice," and might also appear on "The Hills" this season - told us, "Holly is fantastic, probably the best assistant I have ever had." Man, can we please do a reality series about being Joe Francis's assistant? Does it just involve r...