Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Amy Poehler to Leave SNL After Election Season

She's sticking around to play Hillary Clinton when necessary, but, after that, Amy Poehler will be peacing out to have a baby -- and she's not going to return. "It's gonna be really hard — Boyz II Men hard — to say goodbye to yesterday," she says. "SNL was dangerous, late-night, last-minute and star-studded, but like any good drug, you need to know when to put it down." Amy will be working in some capacity on The Office spinoff after she leaves SNL, but she hasn't gone into much detail about that. SNL needs more chicks on it now. Hire me! ...

I Would Blog More Tonight, But I’ve Been Blinded by Heidi Montag’s Hair

I think it's bedtime. It's hard to focus on the screen. That color did something strange to my eyes. Hey, do you guys remember when I had, like, my little nervous breakdown at the beginning of this year? I mean, even before Charlie died and all that and I was just out of my head fucking crazy and going through some really rough shit and it sucked hardcore? Yeah. This is the color my hair was back then. I distinctly remember wandering into the hair salon through my haze of crazy and being ...

Look Who’s Helping!

Nicole Richie may still be an untreated alcoholic with a propensity toward unnecessary roughness while intoxicated, but at least she's taking time out of her busy day to stand by signs to help a very important tax write-off social cause. Nicole and Joel did some promotional work on Monday for Marble Slab Creamery the Text CHILD to 90999 campaign, whereby you can donate $5 to the Richie-Madden Children's Foundation just by sending the aforementioned text message. It's billed to your phone, which is ...

Like Mother Like Daughter-in-Law

Lindsay Lohan's soon-to-be mother in law, Ann Dexter-Jones (the mother of Samantha Ronson, in case you didn't put that together) was spotted outside the Bowery in New York after Lindsay's little paparazzi-smacking incident. First, she was stupid drunk. Secondly, she expressed no shock whatsoever at the fact that Lindsay had just struck a paparazzi. Thoughts? Thanks Emily! /> Lindsay Lohan's soon-to-be mother in law, Ann Dexter-Jones (the mother of Samantha Ronson, in case you didn't put that together) was spotted outside the Bowery in New York after Lindsay's little paparazzi-smacking incident. First, she was stupid drunk. Secondly, she expressed no shock whatsoever at the fact that Lindsay had just struck a paparazzi. Thoughts? Thanks Emily!...

Economy Go Boom

Wall Street saw its worst day since the post-9/11 aftermath on Monday, with the Dow dropping 504 points on news that Lehman declared bankruptcy and Merrill Lynch was sold to B of A to avoid a similar fate itself. Here are some cute kittens to help you digest that news. And I'm reading a lot lately about how those "greedy bastards" got what they deserved, and I feel like a lot of this venom is unwarranted. These people are my friends. I have an MBA, albeit the most underutilized MBA on the ...

Okay, This Made My Day a Little Better

It doesn't matter how fucked our economy is, or how much worse it's probably going to get, or how we're poised to bring entire international economies down with us. Americans will still pretend to have guy-on-guy make-out sessions on Wall Street, standing behind a live CNN broadcast. We are a resilient people. America: FUCK YEAH! [source]...

Hey, What Are Ya’ll Getting up to Tomorrow Night?

Because, if you live in the Seattle area, Film.com is hosting an open bar! Oh, and there's also going to be movie trivia, MC'd by the one and only Laremy Legel, who is, in all honesty, one of the funniest people I know. And I pretty much collect funny people, so that's saying something. I'd recommend going just to watch him be funny. It starts at 8 pm tomorrow (9/16) at the Sole Repair Shop in Cap Hill (1001 E Pike Street, Seattle, Wa). Bring your friends! Bring your movie knowledge! Bri...

Remember Juliana Hatfield?

No? You're not alone. In fact, the former rocker has written a memoir titled When I Grow Up, detailing the painful fall from stardom -- the journey from appearing on late-night talk shows to performing to empty audiences in small-town bars. "It's interesting what happens when you have a dream and your dream comes true," she said in a recent interview. "Then the dream coming true creates a new reality. You have to adjust to a new reality which is not exactly what you thought." Above find a clip of Juliana playing her hit "Spin the Bottle" on Jay Leno a million years ago. I actually remember loving this song. /> No? You're not alone. In fact, the former rocker has written a memoir titled When I Grow Up, detailing the painful fall from stardom -- the journey from appearing on late-night talk shows to performing to empty audiences in small-town bars. "It's interesting what happens when you have a dream and your dream comes true," she said in a recent interview. "Then the dream coming true creates a new reality. You have to adjust to a new reality which is not exactly what you thought." ...
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