Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Biel Needs To Take It Down A Couple Notches

A photo of Jessica Biel Jessica Biel, loving girlfriend of Justin Timberlake (yeah, they're still dating for now), is starting to put some pressure on her man about getting more serious, which is clearly the best course their relationship could take at this time. According to an unnamed source, “Jessica is desperate to settle down and have kids. And ideally she’d like it to be with Justin. She’s been at him for weeks about starting a family. Ideally she’d like to get married, too, but she’s told Justin...

It’s Cool, Bam’s Probably Going To Be Ok

A photo of Bam Margera Despite being hit on the head with a baseball bat Friday night, Bam is already out of the hospital and at home.  I guess when you get into everything that Bam does, you bounce back more easily than other people.  According to Steve-O, fellow Jackass star, he was in intensive care overnight, but he thinks "he's gonna be ok."  There's still no word yet on what caused the fight in the first place. You can look at pictures of Bam being attended to by EMTs here if you're into that sort of thin...

Paris Hilton Just Wants Some Sweet Vampire Lovin’

A photo of Paris Hilton Paris Hilton apparently wants nothing more than to meet and/or date Robert Pattinson.  She's taken to her Twitter to discuss his hotness, and that's cool, but according to an insider, “Paris is doing everything in her power to talk to Rob. She usually always gets what she wants. She gets a bee in her bonnet about someone and goes hell for leather.” While this insider sounds a lot like my grandmother, I still think Paris needs to check herself.  Doesn't she know about the passionate, et...

Amy Winehouse Might Be Doing Something With Her Life

A photo of Amy Winehouse You know, something that isn't an illegal substance. Her father has said that we should be expecting a new album this winter, and when asked how she was going, he said that she is "absolutely fantastic." I think I'll believe it when I see it, because at this point it seems like Amy is known more for her issues than for her music, which is a shame.  Remember that time she released her last album and won five Grammys?  Yeah, she's got some talent.  Let's just hope she hasn't smoked it...

Kate Hudson And Matt Bellamy?

A photo of Kate Hudson Kate Hudson and Matt Bellamy, frontman of Muse, have reportedly been dating for the past few weeks.  They've been doing their best to keep their new love a secret, but later this month at the Glastonbury Festival they plan on going public.  Are you not so excited for them? Ok, I don't really care about Kate Hudson or who she's banging (though I respect that some people really do), but Muse?  I love me some Muse, and now I have this awful video playing in my head of Matt Bellamy tenderly an...

Simon Monjack Had A Secret Or Two

A photo of Simon Monjack and Brittany Murphy And those secrets were children. When Simon's family went through his computer after his death, they found a series of emails from two different women who demanded child support from Monjack.  The family handed the computer over to the coroner, and after the emails were reviewed, it was found that Monjack had a son with one of the women and a daughter with the other. The computer also showed that Monjack was wiring a lot of money - as much as $48,000 in a single transfer - to various law...

Johnny Weir Is Talented, Adorable, And Hopefully A Dancer

A photo of Johnny Weir You guys know about Johnny Weir, right?  He's the best figure skater, if you didn't know.  Now that you do, please join with me in rejoicing the fact that he wants to be on Dancing With The Stars. “I hope [I’m going to do Dancing With the Stars]. I met Karina Smirnoff a few weeks ago and she was like, 'Johnny, you are the perfect height for me. Let's dance.' So ... it's on. I've chosen my partner, I'm ready." Did you hear that, whoever is in charge of selecting contestants for Dancing With T...

Quotables

A photo of Russell Brand at the "Get Him to The Greek" Sydney premier "Me and my fiancee love him. We want our own Justin Bieber. We can’t have the actual one because he’s busy with his work. I understand he procreates by laying eggs in the sea and then we can fertilize these eggs and have our own Justin Biebers. We could grow Justin Bieber in a jar like sea monkeys.” - Russell Brand discussing how he and Katy Perry love Justin Bieber. I adore Russell Brand.  Not in the "omg, I totes want to bang him" way, more in the "he has interesting hair, I ...

Stop Talking About Sarah Palin’s Boobs

photo of sarah palin before and after breast implants There's been a lot of rumors about Sarah Palin getting breast implants, but she wants you to know that's not the truth. "No, I have not had implants.  A report like that is about as real and truthful as reports that [my husband] Todd and I are divorcing or that I bought a place in the Hamptons or that [my son] Trigg is not my own child." She also says the cause of these rumors are "bored, idle bloggers and reporters with nothing else to talk about."  Hey, don't hate, Sarah. It's hard out...

Dorothy of Oz, I Cannot Wait For You

A photo of Lea Michele Lea Michele has her first feature film role as the voice of Dorothy in the upcoming Dorothy of Oz, an animated 3D extravaganza.  Other members of the cast include Dan Aykroyd as the Scarecrow, Jim Belushi as the Lion, Kelsey Grammer as the Tin Man, Oliver Platt as the new character Wiser the Owl, and Martin Short as the Jester, Dorothy's new arch-nemesis.  The songs will be written by Bryan Adams. I love everything about this.  It's either going to be completely beautiful or a complete...

Another Day, Another Gary Coleman Will

A photo of Gary Coleman Ok, so there was Gary Coleman's original, official will from 1999 that appointed a friend as executor of his estate and left all of his assets to the  "Trustee of the Millennium Edge Trust."  Then his crazy ex-wife produced that sketchy hand-written document that named her the sole beneficiary from 2007, but that's just a codicil of the original will.  Now there's another will from 2005 in which Gary leaves everything to some chick named Anna Gray.  Apparently Anna and Gary were close buds and roomies, but when Gary met ol' Shannon Price, things we...

Kristen Stewart Is Planning Her Stage Debut While I Plan On Giving Up On Humanity

A photo of Kristen Stewart at the MTV Movie Awards Kristen Stewart is currently talking to some producers and directors about the possibility of doing some theatre on London's West End after her whole Twilight business is wrapped up.  She hasn't decided what play she wants to be in yet, but the producers have given her some plays to peruse.  I had trepidations about this whole affair, but then I read this illuminating quote she made to Vogue: "Unlike movie acting, you have to deliver the whole performance there and then. You live it every ...