Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Michael Lohan Jr. Is The Smartest Lohan

A photo of Lindsay Lohan, Dina Lohan, and Michael Lohan Jr. You see that guy in the foreground up there?  The guy with the cool shades and the delightfully tousled hair?  That's Michael Lohan Jr. You might not recognize him - that's ok, he doesn't come out much.  When he does go public though, it's pretty clear that little Michael Jr. has a head on his shoulders, and that he's going to be the one Lohan to make it.  You know, without numerous counts of criminal charges. Little Michael Jr. (who's actually a decently attractive 23-year old and not so littl...

David Beckham Thinks He’s Jesus

A photo of David Beckham at a Lakers game David Beckham has a new tattoo on his chest, and just like any other bro would do, he posted pictures of his ink on Facebook. You can check out the pictures in the gallery, but for now, let me just tell you that it's a tattoo of Jesus being carried by a few cherubs through some rough times. Here's what David had to say about the tattoo: "It’s Jesus being carried by three cherubs and obviously the cherubs are my boys and so my thought of it is that at some point my boys are going to need...

Let’s Pre-Game Tonight’s Oscar Fashion With Disappointing Fashion from The Independent Spirit Awards!

A photo of Natalie Portman at the Independent Spirit Awards Seriously, all this ridiculousness better be because everybody's going to go all out at the Oscars.  I'm about over the mediocrity and the trashiness of this year's award season. By the way, in case you care about the actual awards, Natalie Portman won Best Actress again, and James Franco won Best Actor for 127 Hours, which I hope is a good sign for the Oscars. I just love that stoner so much.  You can check out the rest of the winners here, but let's go ahead and jump into the gallery. This gallery includes photos of Natalie Portman continuing on ...

Kelsey Grammer Married His Fourth Wife Yesterday

A photo of Kelsey Grammer and Kayte Walsh on their wedding day Remember Kayte Walsh, the lady that Kelsey Grammer probably cheated on his wife with, knocked up with a Frasier baby, and then she miscarried?  Yeah, they got married last night.  Isn't that sweet? Here are the wedding details, if you're into that sort of thing: Grammer, 55, and Walsh, 29, exchanged vows during an afternoon ceremony at the Longacre Theater in New York City, where the five-time Emmy Award-winner recently starred in the Tony-winning revival of the musical La Cage aux Folles. Following the ceremony, the newlyweds and their guests headed to the rece...

An Open Letter to Ke$ha Regarding Her Latest Music Video, “Blow”

Dear Ke$ha, We've had our fair share of problems in the past.  I think we can both admit that.  But I thought we were getting past that, that we were heading towards a more mature, close stage in our friendship.  And then you go and do something like this. Ke$ha, you know that I have a socially awkward 12-year-old girl's mentality when it comes to unicorns.  I've shown you all my figurines and stuffed animals and jewelry and tattoo sketches.  And you also know how wonderful rainbows make me fe...

Love It or Leave It: Matt Damon in His Jim-Jams

A photo of Matt Damon at the ICG Publicist Awards The ICG Publicist Awards were last night, and I don't know what that's all about, but it's an award show, and Matt Damon wore his pajamas.  He showed up to this legit award show (I included a picture of Arnold Schwarzenegger in his suit for comparison) in a flannel robe and pants, slippers, disheveled hair, and the greatest "I just don't give a fuck" look I've ever seen.  Seriously, Matt Damon walked the carpet, took some pictures, and presented an award in his fucking pajamas, and I just t...

Quotables: Joan Rivers Weighs In on Jennifer Aniston’s New Hair

A photo of Joan Rivers "I would like to take Jennifer Aniston and put her hair over her fucking face! I'm so bored with her and her stupid movies. They're all the same, I don't know how they get financed." Too true, Joan. So when I was planning out what to say for this little piece, I was all set to defend Jennifer.  I mean, it's not like I love her weak new haircut or anything, but I typically like to cheer for the underdog.  But then I checked her IMDB page and the only thing she's ever been in that I particularl...

Charlie Sheen Is High on Life, And Don’t You Forget It

A photo of Charlie Sheen Charlie Sheen is golden these days.  We all know that.  And now that he doesn't have a job, the sky's going to be the limit to this man's ability to shenan (that's the verb form of "shenanigans" for those of you not in the know).  For instance, do you know where Charlie Sheen is right now?  He's on vacation with his ex-wife (Brooke Mueller, the crackhead he pulled a knife on just in time for Christmas), porn star Bree Olson, and model Natalie Kenly, and no doubt having filthy, crack-tasti...

Surprise, Robert Pattinson Is A Hoarder!

A photo of Robert Pattinson Except that news isn't really surprising at all, is it?  It's actually very easy to imagine Robert Pattinson saving all his greasy t-shirts, and I bet he even holds on to Kristen's stupid flannel, because he's a sentimental dude like that. Let's check out the specifics of Robert's hoarding ways: He told the Daily Record: "I'm a hoarder. I gave away all my furniture from [when I lived in] Baton Rouge, but with books and things I have storage spaces all over the world. "It's ridiculous. C...

Would You Watch A Remake of The Bodyguard?

A photo of The Bodyguard movie poster If so, you're in luck, because them good ol' Warner Bros are on it.  It's ok if you have to take a break to do a happy dance and take a celebratory shot, that's exactly what I did when I heard this news.  So you go ahead and take care of that, then check out the details on the remake: The original was a fairly straight ahead tale of a Secret Service agent (Costner in a Steve McQueen homage, down to his hairstyle) drafted to protect a singing diva whose life has been threatened by a stalker,...

This Is What Could Have Happened At The Oscars If Burlesque Hadn’t Been A Horrible Movie

In a perfect world, Lindsay Lohan would actually act in movies, Justin Bieber would spend his days discussing topical issues and politics, and Burlesque would be a film remotely worthy of an Oscar nomination.  Aside from the obvious benefits of such a world (Lindsay's Linda Lovelace biopic would have been so intense), there's a specific, special one that we're going to talk about today, and that benefit is the audio clip above. If you're listening to the clip and having trouble figuring out its contents, let me help you out:  it's James Franco rehearsing a...

Quotables: Christina Applegate Says Beautiful Words About Her Baby

A photo of Christina Applegate at the Late Show With David Letterman "Just that moment, pulling her out and I dropped my gown which I don’t do. This part of my body is very private to me [her chest]…that’s a real private place. A place that I don’t have a good relationship with, let’s say. But at that moment of pulling her out and I just tore that thing [gown] off. There’s a room full of people that I don’t know. Nurses and doctors. And she and I just laid there. It was the best thing that’s ever happened to me." -Christina Applegate discus...
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