Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Justin Timberlake Talks Britney, Biel, and Bad Life Choices

A photo of Justin Timberlake When I was 13 and silly, J.C. was my favorite dude from 'NSync, and oh, how I loved him.  But these days, I'm willing to admit how wrong I was and embrace the beauty and perfection that is Justin Timberlake.  Just don't tell my 13-year-old self, ok?  Because she would throw a fit in the worst way. These emotions all came up today as I was reading through some of Justin's quotes in the July issue of Vanity Fair. Let me share some of his words and then you can tell me of your growing fondness, all right? On Jessica Biel: “She is the single-handedly most si...

Moby Defines Music, Calls Out Britney Spears Again

A photo of Moby Man, Moby is on fire this month. Remember that time a few weeks ago when he called Britney Spears "broken" and we were all like "daaaamn!"?  Well, it looks like this man still isn't done ragging on Britney, and this time, he pulls poor, innocent Ke$ha into the mix as well.  In a recent interview with Spinner, Moby was asked about the musical stylings of these popular ladies, and he wasn't shy about expressing his thoughts: "It's fun, but I don't think of it as music. It's manufactured. I appr...

Quotables: LeAnn Rimes Defends Her Body

A photo of LeAnn Rimes "Those are called abs, not bones, love.  Thanks, but this is my body and I can promise you I'm a healthy girl.  Thanks for your concern, but no need to be." This was LeAnn Rimes' response on Twitter after she posted the bikini pic above and some of her fans pointed out that she looks like she's dying.  Now don't we all just feel stupid?! She's not bony, ok, she looks great and she's the picture of health and how dare you imply otherwise.  In fact, we could all learn a few things from LeAnn.  So the next ti...

Celebrity Tweet of the Day: The “Punched in The Throat” Edition

Listen, I am not a violent person.  I am the least violent person I know.  That being said, there are still times when people say or do something that just makes me want to punch them in the throat.  Why the throat specifically, you might ask. Because I'm a short girl who can't pack much of a punch, and it just makes sense. Anyway, as I'm sure you can imagine by now, Twitter is a great place for people to say douchey things deserving of a splash of violence, and so here are a few examples for you to peruse: ...

Quotables: Dolly Parton Tells It Like It Is

A photo of Dolly Parton "I'd love to do a duet, always wanted to work with Madonna, but she never asked. [Madonna and GaGa are] the perfect fit. I'm as outrageous as they are. I was gaudy before they were gaudy." You know, I never thought about this before, but I think Dolly Parton is onto something here.  If you look at Dolly throughout the years, of course she's always been outrageous and gaudy - that's her charm.  However, I absolutely love Dolly Parton, and I obviously don't feel the same way about Lady Gaga or Madonna, and I think ...

Just In Case You Wanted to Know About Kurt Cobain’s Junk

A photo of Kurt Cobain Courtney Love, the woman who will not stop giving golden quotes, has done it again, and this time it's on the topic of her late husand, Kurt Cobain.  Or more specifically, his penis. "Kurt had more presence and more beauty than Brad Pitt - who wanted to play Kurt, by the way. He was a leader, he was strong, in fact he was well fucking hung, if you really want to know. I know that there are a ton of people who will hear this and then cry while masturbating, and that's who this is for.  Kurt was packing, ladies and gentlemen.  Let that little tid...

How Ridiculous Is Kim Kardashian’s Engagement Ring?

A photo of Kim Kardashian Yesterday, Sarah told you guys the happy news - Kim Kardashian is engaged!  She also told you guys a little about the engagement ring (20.5 carats), but today, Amy Grindhouse has pictures.  And it's absurd. Does anyone genuinely think this is a good look?  Once a diamond gets to be a certain size, doesn't it just look trashy? I know the ring cost $2 million - and that's another issue altogether - but to me, it just looks like something you get out of a quarter machine that will turn your fi...

Guess How Many Inches Kirstie Alley Lost Off Her Waist!

A photo of Kirstie Alley 38. Kirstie Alley is saying that she lost 38 inches off her waistline. I like you, Kirstie, but no you fucking didn't.  If you lost 38 inches, then you would lose an entire person, and a pretty decently sized person at that.  Not to be mean, but check Yahoo! Answers or a tape measure and you can see that Kirstie's claim is impossible and ridiculous. Ladies, it's ok, seriously.  Just be healthy and happy and charming and nobody will care about exactly how many inches around your waist is.  Can we all just agree on that please?...

Just Check Out Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis Be Funny Together

You guys, my boyfriend is so funny.  I'm always like, "Zach, you're so wacky!" and then we make out. Oh, sorry, is this reality?  Ok, my fault, I apologize.  In reality, one of my favorite celebrities, Zach Galifianakis, interviewed another one of my favorite celebrities, Will Ferrell, and absolute hilarity ensued. I love Between Two Ferns, natch, and this was one of the better episodes, in my opinion.  That may or may not be because I got oddly aroused at the part where Zach eats strawberries out of W...

Brace Yourselves, Twihards – It’s The First Breaking Dawn Poster!

A photo of the Breaking Dawn poster Are you as underwhelmed as I am?  I would take literally anything other than this bullshit forest.  If they'd released a poster of Robert Pattinson gnawing through Kristen Stewart's uterus with Taylor Lautner creeping in the background, I'd have just loved it to bits. They could have made the poster just that picture of Kristen's puppy, and at least I would have had something to fucking look at. What are you thinking, Twihards?  Are you disappointed, or is this just enough of a tease to get you going?...

OF COURSE Paula Abdul Keeps Pot Brownies in Her House

A photo of Kara DioGuardi and Paula Abdul Kara DioGuardi, the American Idol judge that no one cared about, was on George Lopez's show last night, and she recounted just the most delightful tale of an evening at the home of Paula Abdul.  Would you like to hear it? Kara goes over to her friend Paula's house for a little party. She's having a good time, you know, but then she gets a rumbly in her tumbly and has to eat something immediately. She moseys on over to Paula Abdul's fridge and finds some brownies - success!  She helps herself to six of...

Quotables: Courtney Love Talks Sex

A photo of Courtney Love "I'm a very sexual person, but in general, I think sex is kind of overrated. Most of the guys I sleep with have tended to be actors and musicians and directors. And they tend to be lousy lays." - Courtney Love, continuing to prove her insanity. For real though, I think Courtney is dead wrong on all counts, but I'm willing to give her a little leeway. Like sex might seem overrated if it's in the middle of a coke binge, and actors, musicians, and directors might be lousy lays if they're also...
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