Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Hilarious Leak of Raw Christina Aguilera Recording (Listen Before It’s Taken Down!)

Let's be super clear about one thing: Christina Aguilera is one hell of a crazy-ass bitch, but the girl can sing. If you think she can't sing, then you need to get your head/ears checked immediately. You should also consider adopting some sort of small animal, because it'll teach you how to love and open up your heart and maybe be less of a crazy person yourself. Now that we've sorted that out, listen to this leaked version of her new song, "You Lost Me," that's so raw that you can actually hear her say at the 5:17 mark, "Awful." Like, the ...

One Part of The Royal Wedding I Can Get Behind: The Cake

I told you the other day that I was so fed up with Royal Wedding fever that I was basically annoyed to the point of petty anger, but here's one aspect of the whole shebang that I'm willing to concentrate on: THE CAKE, Y'ALL. Personally, I get sick of cake after a bite or two, but a well-made pastry ain't nothing to scoff at, and this delicacy? It's fit for a future king and his bride, that's for damn sure. The flavor was William's favorite chocolate biscuit cake (once again, Kate's prefer...

For Only $1,000, You Could Meet The Shell of a Human That is Britney Spears

Remember how earlier this week I told you that you can see Britney Spears live for anywhere between $99 and $999? Well, if you're one of the eleven people on the planet earth rich and crazy enough to buy the highest priced tickets, you also get the bonus of meeting the totally crazy former pop princess in person! Score! I'd like to take a moment to remind everyone (especially you, Lisa Loeb) that it's 2011, Britney Spears is freakin' crazy and the apocalypse is going to hit before we all k...

Love It or Leave It: Rihanna’s Red Beehive

OK, so I am now totally on board with Rihanna's bright red hair and I'm really on board with her meeting music legend David Bowie, but I know there's gotta be at least a handful of you out there who are still looking at this flamin' 'do like, "Girl, WHAT?!" There are a couple of angles to check out in the gallery, so please click through and let me know your thoughts in the comments. And P.S. - if you haven't heard this "What's My Name?"/Jack and Diane" mash-up, you're totally missing ou...

Selena Gomez Thinks Bipolar Disorder is Cute, Trendy

I was just reading this interview with Selena Gomez where they asked her what it's like dating pop sensation Justin Bieber and dealing with his haters and juggling her work schedule with all of that, and are you ready for what she said? It's a doozy. "I am sure I have some sense of bipolar-ness. I wake up happy then I turn to sadness on a dime. It's crazy but I do enjoy all of it right now." Some sort of bipolar-ness? Hmmm, is that a dig at her former BFF Demi Lovato or just one of the most in...

Friday Fun: I Figured Out How To Make You All Millionaires

You know how the National Enquirer is always running headlines like, "Woman Sees Face of Jesus in a Dorito?" OK, well, I have a feeling that there's going to be a lot more headlines like that after watching this video on how to make a Grilled Cheesus. That's right: A grilled cheese sandwich with the face of our Lord and Savior. Fine, the face of the guy that my grandmother used to tell me was my Lord and Savior before I went to college and stopped believing in anything having to do with organized religion. Sorry, Katy Perry's mom. This vide...

Michael Jackson’s Kids Are Taking Up Acting, Because God Forbid They Have a Sense of Normalcy

Is anyone else completely horrified by the news that all three of Michael Jackson's kids, Prince, Paris and Blanket, are enrolled in after school acting classes? I mean, community theater is a perfectly acceptable activity for children, but all three of them are studying with a real acting teacher and reading books about "respecting the craft" and shit. Um, did the Jackson's ever hear of soccer or Girl Scouts or something? Haven't these kid's lives been hectic enough without throwing the whole "child acting" thing into the mix? Thankfully, Paris (who is freakin' gor...

Perfect Little Kate Middleton is All Ready For Her Dumb Wedding

Lookie what we have here! A whole set of photos of that skinny little future princess Kate Middleton arriving at the London hotel where she and her family will be staying tonight in anticipation for tomorrow's Royal Wedding (and I capitalize those words because everyone else does, not because I think they're worthy of capitalization.) Sarah already said today that she and Sassy Gay Friend don't care about Kate and William's big day, but I'm going to go ahead and tell you that I'm flat-out...

Cindy Crawford’s Can Still Rock The Cover of ‘Vogue’

This post is all about giving props to 45-year old Cindy Crawford, who's rocking the cover of Vogue Mexico like it's the early 90s again. Cindy was pretty much the most beautiful lady in the world when I was growing up (I even named my pet crawfish, Cindy Crawfish, after her,) and it's amazing to see that in the time it's taken me to get boobs (sorta,) graduate high school, go to college and work for seven years, that she hasn't changed one freakin' bit. Don't get it twisted, this isn't a "Wow, she looks great for her age," post, this is a "What the he...

Poll: Which ‘Entertainment Weekly’ Cover Are the Twihards Dying to Get Their Hands On?

Ugh, I'm not sure I'm even prepared for another Twilight movie to be released. We've been talking about this movie for months (hell, it seems like years) and I don't think the trailers are even running in theaters yet. But I'm not totally selfish. I know that there are plenty of Twihards out there that absolutely can't wait to see R.Patz and K.Stew's tame sex scene and melt down in the theater when it's finally all over after all of these years. I'll give you your moment, and apparently, so w...

Lisa Loeb Releases Eyewear Collection Just In Time for 1995

Before I say a bunch of really petty stuff about Lisa Loeb, allow me to say that she totally killed it on the Reality Bites soundtrack in 1994 and that I think I owned a CD of hers when I was in sixth grade. Fine, I know I owned a CD of hers. Also, I feel really badly that she dated Ethan Hawke back in the day because I feel like she's a really sensitive lady and he's probably a major satchel of dicks. OK? We square? I got the nice shit out of the way? ALRIGHT! You guys, when I saw toda...

Poll: What Do We Think of Blake Lively’s Red Locks?

Sarah posted a link to a story about Blake Lively's new hair color in one of today's link round ups, but I think this radical change is worth a little more than a link, right? Blake Lively not being a blonde anymore? Yo, I could write a book about all my hair feelings. I don't think Blake looks any better, but I also don't think she looks any worse. I recently dyed my naturally dark brown hair red, and after about a month and a half of attempting to keep it up, I went right back to my natur...
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