Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Ke$ha Will Kick Your Ass

Not going to lie, Ke$ha has gone from fascinating me to making me very very nervous very quickly. At first I was all about her brand of empowered female trainwreck behavior, but now I'm just like, "I hope to God I never run in to that bitch in a dark alley." Because I'm not a fighter, you guys. I have stringy Olive Oil arms and I wasn't built to fight. And I think Ke$ha would probably kick my ass. That's why I'm nervous that she was at my bowling alley yesterday filming her new music video. She ...

The First Five Minutes of the Lost Season Finale

After the third season of Lost I was all "I can't take this anymore" and I quit watching. I realize that makes me one of the few people on Earth who no longer cares about the show, so I figured I'd post this video for all of you extremely patient and dedicated freaks. Hey guys! Look! It's the first scene from the new episode of Lost, which is ending its final season on February 2nd. I applaud your dedication if you're caught up to where this clip starts off. I can't even begin to attempt to pre...

Girls Will Always Love Weird Looking Teenage Boys

Nick Jonas has been performing shows with his band The Administration in my neighborhood all week. In fact, if I climb on my bathroom counter and stick my head out the window and turn my head left, I can kind of see the venue where he was performing last night. As you can imagine, my street has been flooded with little girls and tweens all week waiting to catch a glimpse of the youngest JoBro, and so I can't help but wonder "What is the hype with this dude?" Nick Jonas is not attractive. He's n...

Danielle Staub is So Crazy and I Love It

Remember Danielle from The Real Housewives of New Jersey? The one who had "the book" written about her and was giving daily blow jobs to Teresa's husband's 26-year old friend? That one. She's so bananas. She just did an interview with People, and in addition to telling the magazine that she is abstaining from sex until she's married, there were all sorts of awesome soundbites. For example: “I’m abstinent now. I realized that with abstinence, if you really, really believe in yourself like I do, you discover your own self-worth. Abstinence means you refrain from any sex — thinking about it, doing it — even to yourself! I’m a born-again virgin.” “I am saving m...

Isn’t She Supposed to Be Sad About Her Dead Fiancée?

Tila Tequila went to Kitson Kids yesterday to pick out some treats for that "baby" she's "expecting". Considering we're exposed to her nightly meltdowns on Twitter, it's strange to see the MySpace ho look so damn happy while digging through overpriced message Ts. Since Tila isn't exactly a paparazzi target, you know she had to call them to meet her out. I'm looking at these photos as a form of performance art. It's just a shame that she didn't pull out this bit before they announced the Oscar ...

Of Course Wall Street 2 is Going to Suck

The trailer for Oliver Stone's Wall Street 2 was released today. I'm not posting this because anyone ever thought a sequel to Wall Street in 2010 even had a chance of being good, but because I can't believe how unbelievably shitty this movie looks. It's so infinitely worse than anything I could have suspected that I'm shocked. Michael Douglas is old. Shia LeBeouf is a cocky little hamface. The music sounds like it came from a CD of pre-liscened "tension" music. The message feels irrelevant, but...

Quotables

"I think I'd have to go with Lady Gaga because she really, really just took over this year. She was everywhere. She's fearless when it comes to fashion and videos and I think a lot of other people play it really safe. I think she's been a total breath of fresh air. I love her videos. In some ways I think she's the most interesting without seeming to try to hard since Madonna. I think I'm able to like her because I don't see any of myself in her. And for awhile, I think, after Missundaztoodca...

These People Need to Be Done Having Kids

Michelle Duggar gave birth to her millionth baby this year, a little girl named Josie Brooklyn, and this birth did not go as well as planned. Michelle went in to labor early due to complications with her own health, and baby Josie's health has been suffering as a result. From People Magazine: The micropreemie was rushed from University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences in Little Rock, Ark., the hospital where she was born, to Arkansas Children's Hospital, her parents at her side. "She de...

Michael Lohan is a Damn Fool

Michael Lohan, you never fail us. You are consistently the saddest excuse for a man on the planet, and as someone who makes a living off of writing stories about what a jackass you are, I would like to thank you for that. You are a gift. Michael got arrested again today, you guys! For calling his former lover (ew) at work last week.  This is the second time Michael's been arrested recently for breaking the restraining order his ex-girlfriend Erin Mueller has against him. The last time Michael went to the slammer for this broad was back in December...

Nicole Richie is Insulted That You Thought She Had an Eating Disorder

Nicole Richie is looking great these days now that's she's settled in to her post-baby figure and seems to be happy with her man, Joel Madden. For a long time though, especially after her alarming weight loss during her days on The Simple Life, questions were raised about wether or not Nicole was starving herself, on drugs, or perhaps some sort of combination of the two. In the article that accompanies her Marie Claire cover this month, Nicole dismisses these rumors for a final time... and kind of ...

What’s Going On With These Two?

Lily Allen may be mad about her man Sam Cooper, but she also seems to have a lot of fun with her friend Matt Bellamy, the frontman of Muse. The two of them took in a game at the Australian Open yesterday and seemed to be having a blast as they placed bets and laughed together. Is this just a great friendship or do you think that perhaps they're crushing on each other? Matt did just break-up with his longtime girlfriend in December... [gallery]...

Quotables

"When I post, I forget I'm famous. Then occasionally I'll look, and it'll say 345,000 people and I'm like, "Ah!" It's a really bad thing: I'm a good rock musician; I am one suck-ass celebrity, though. It's OK; I would rather be good at what I do and a terrible celebrity than a good celebrity and suck at what I do." - Courtney Love in Spinner on her fame and bad blogging practices....
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