Kim Kardashian Got Married!

I know, right? Finally. After what feels like absolute eons of engagement ring talk, wedding invitation judging, bridal registry complaints, and just plain waiting on pins and needles, Kim Kardashian is officially a married gal. Stop what you’re doing and grab a glass of champagne or some PCP or whatever it is you kids do nowadays and celebrate!

We don’t have any pictures yet – the pictures were sold to People, who will be publishing them in next Friday’s issue – but trust me, as soon as we see any hint of them, you’ll know. We’re krazy for Kardashians! Well, not really, but you know I had to do that.

Ok, if you can’t manage to wait any longer to hear some wedding details, then you just calm your heart, because boy, do I have a good few.

The Kardashian’s Keepers, E!, have a good long recap of the wedding.  Tomorrow evening, they’ll show a little clip from inside the wedding, but their full special doesn’t air till October. To tide you over, check out these beautiful facts.

What Kim looked like: Kim wore ivory Vera Wang. But though People will have those pictures for you this Friday in the Sept. 5 issue, we can tell you that the dress was strapless, with a fitted bodice, a full, rather traditionally cut tulle skirt, and an epic train. The shoes were Guiseppe Zanotti. Her hair was up and her veil remained off her face as she walked down the aisle, the veil topped by a jeweled headpiece with diamonds that dripped onto Kim’s forehead.

Wedding colors: She carried a white-rose bouquet down the aisle, and white roses indeed seemed to be the flower of the evening. The entire ceremony—and the ongoing reception—had a black and white theme, with the only stitch of color being the tiny pink box that Humphries’ best man, longtime pal Josh Ketroser, presented the rings in.

Bridesmaids: Khloé Kardashian Odom and Kourtney Kardashian were matron and maid of honor, while Kylie and Kendal Jenner and Kris’ sister, Kaela Humphries, served as bridesmaids. All wore ivory.

The ceremony: According to E!’s chief news correspondent—and wedding guest!—Ken Baker, the ceremony started at around 6:37 p.m., lasted approximately 30 minutes and was brimming with charming moments.

The program passed out to guests included tributes to Humphries’ late grandmother and grandfather, as well as to Kim’s late father, attorney Robert Kardashian.

“I so wish my dad could be here today to walk me down the aisle. But I know in a way he is here, and I feel his loving presence all around me. I love and miss you, dad,” read the passage prepared by Kim.

As Humphries took his place at the altar, he could be heard whispering to a buddy, “I’m nervous,” but he steeled himself with a few deep breaths and carried on.

Kourtney’s son Mason was the ring bearer, but as Kourtney started carrying him down the aisle (marked with the same intertwined “K” logo from the invitations) she stumbled slightly, prompting a collective gasp from the guests. All was fine, and Mason grabbed the symbolic pillow and hurried it down the aisle himself. After that, it was into daddy Scott Disick’s arms for most of the ceremony.

Pastor Joel Johnson, who’s known Humphries since he was a teenager, did the officiating. He opened by telling those assembled, “This is not just a mere wedding event.”

How could he tell?!

At one point during the traditional Christian service, Johnson recounted how he had asked the bride and groom beforehand to write down the thing each loved most about the other and show him their answers.

According to the pastor, Kim said that Kris puts a smile on her face every day, he’s the “yin to her yang,” he brings calm to her life, she appreciates the trust he gives her and, to quote Kim, he brings the fun out of her. As for Kris, he said he loved Kim for her compassion, how she treats every day as if it’s her last and how, the first time they met, all she talked about was her family.

The din of helicopters whirring overhead was constant, but the bride, groom and pastor were miked for the occasion, so the noise didn’t mar the mood too much. (The cameras that were onhand capturing all the action for E!’s two-part wedding special were strategically placed and draped in white to better blend in.)

The ceremony concluded with a prayer, and little Mason showed his agreement by joining in with a cry. Kourtney helped him calm down, Kim and Kris kissed, and there was much applause.

The reception: It was off to the grounds out back for champagne and hors d’oeuvres before the big reception began. Kim had at least two more outfits she was planning to change into, both Vera Wang and both ivory. Kris swapped his white Ermenegildo Zegna jacket and bowtie for a black jacket and tie by the same designer to match his groomsmen.

All in all, it sounds like another triumph of true love.  Or, at the very least, another pretty wedding to watch.

Kongrats, Kardashians!