Shape Magazine Throws LeAnn Rimes Under the Bus, Apologizes For Her Mere Presence

So, remember the recent Shape magazine cover where everyone was like, ‘Oh, damn, check out LeAnn’s revenge body,’ though she didn’t need to do the whole revenge thing, ’cause she was the one who cheated, so she kind of had it backwards?

Well, anyway, the dedicated readers of the magazine (I know, I couldn’t believe it either) wrote to the editor-in-chief, claiming how distasteful it was to find LeAnn plastered all over their blessed magazine and how offended they were that a homewrecker like Rimes would be featured in the magazine – not only as a cover girl, but as the main interview – flaunting both her ass and her excuses.

So because of this, it would appear that the editor-in-chief of Shape took its readers’ concerns seriously and decided to write an email apologizing to all of them, obviously under the assumption that the email would remain private, much like the messages sent through a fucking Little Orphan Annie special decoder (Fort Knox, bitches). The apology? Got it here:

Subject: To my dear Shape readers

You are all in good company (why I’m e-mailing you all together) as you all agree Shape has made a terrible mistake in putting LeAnn Rimes on the cover.

Please know that our putting her on the cover was not meant to put a husband-stealer on a pedestal-but to show (through her story) how we all are human. And this woman in particular found strength in exercise in what she said was her most difficult personal moment.

But it did not come across that way … And for that I’m terribly sorry.

I hope that we can do better the next time for those of you that will give us another chance.

Humbly,

Valerie

OK, so, ‘humbly Valerie,’ tell me this … Did the thought once cross your mind about sticking to principle, or did you just allow this rabid band of readers out for blood intimidate your Shape empire? Did you once think that, though LeAnn made her mistakes and she continually faces criticism from magazines and, ahem, websites, that you could – at the very least – quietly stick to your guns and ignore the self-righteous shit about featuring LeAnn in your magazine? ‘Cause girl, guess what: it’s your magazine. For the most part. And you shouldn’t have to defend your decision or explain it away – at least not over something like this, anyway.

And I know, I know; I’m assuming that the readers of Shape are perfect, church-going, ethereal beings that wouldn’t have the slightest idea of how to carry on an extramarital affair, let alone singe their holy corneas in reading about such – sniff – sordid affairs, so I can clearly see how this might offend them, but let’s get real: What LeAnn (and Eddie Cibrian; people are awfully quick to exonerate him for his carnal crimes) did was shitty, for everyone involved, and she’s said that time and again. And LeAnn – and dear God I can not believe that I’m defending her – has made no bones about (the continuous stream of) details. She’s not hiding anything, she did her thing, it was wrong, she owned up to it, she bragged about it for awhile, and now it’s over.

Will we, at gossip rags, and celebrity magazines and television shows continue to dredge this crap up over and over again ’til everyone’s sick and tired of hearing about it?  Damn straight. But you don’t have to explain why you did what you did, nor should you have to apologize over it.  This is small potatoes, girl.

Laissez les bon temps rouler.