Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Kiefer Sutherland: Charged, Released, Idiot.

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Kiefer Sutherland showed up yesterday at a New York City police station where he was charged with a misdemeanor offense of assault with a deadly noggin.  Or, you know, just assault.  He’ll have to show up in court June 22nd to answer the charge.

You’ll remember that Kiefer (allegedly!) head-butted designer Jack McCollough the other night.  The good news is that the dude doesn’t have a broken nose as was originally reported.

If Sutherland is found guilty, he could a year in the slammer since this crime was (allegedly!) committed while he was on parole from a 2008 DUI.

I was thinking that the female version of Kiefer Sutherland is Lindsay Lohan.  Fair skin, light eyes, reddish hair, rap sheets, a love of all things cut on a mirror.  Can you imagine if these two drug clones hooked up?  I can see it now-we could call them Reefer Blohan.

9 CommentsLeave a comment

  • You wrote that entire post just so you could say “Reefer Blohan” didn’t you?! You are awesome.

  • How drunk are you that you think a person got knocked over, and headbut someone so hard you break their face when they never touched said person? Deeerunk! Too bad Keifer’s a raging alky because he’s got talent, La Blohan not so much anymore.

    Why was he even at the Met costume gala, guesses?

  • He was at the met because he is involved with a kinda scary lady named Siobhan Bonnuvirer. She is a fashion stylist or something, and ditches him whenever he gets drunk , I guess.

  • “If Sutherland is found guilty, he could a year in the slammer since this”

    Seriously Wendie, proofread your posts! This must be the third I’ve read from you in as many posts!

    • “This must be the third I’ve read from you in as many posts!”

      the third what? Mesdames, proofread your comments!

      ;)

  • I hope Kiefer stays drunk…maybe I could have my way with him. Such a sexy fuck up.