Today's Evil Beet Gossip

You Would All Still Go to See Spider-Man 3 Even If I Told You It Was 140 Minutes of Kirsten Dunst Reading Her Own Poetry, But Just FYI, It Probably Sucks

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An excerpt from Rex Reed’s review in The Observer:

Over-produced, over-publicized, over-designed, over-computerized and just plain over the moon, it’s so preposterously overwrought with so many bewildering plots juggling simultaneously for over-emphasis, there’s no entry point for criticism. You just stare at it, as you might a great big exploding pile of cow manure …

The sets are cheesy. The actors are unconscious. The writing is barely legible. The digital effects are overwhelming, without a shred of freshness or originality. None of it makes sense. In summation, Spider-Man 3 consists of one swollen contrivance after another until they all fester and erupt in an incomprehensible blast of noise and gibberish.