Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Crappy Movies Change the World


I am stunned by this quote out of Jess Simpson:

She made that decision (divorce), she says, after watching the 2004 romance The Notebook on a plane ride home to Texas. “I just figured out the statement,” she says of the movie, starring Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams as star-crossed lovers. “It was about that moment of desperation. I needed to breathe.”

She figured out the statement? The Goddamn movie isn’t exactly secretive. Figuring it out is like figuring out the statement to Snakes on a Plane. Guess what? There’s fucking snakes.

I really hated The Notebook but I know there are women out there who love it. So I’ll just say this; how many times have you made a decision based on a movie? Also, now that I really bore down into her quote, the movie isn’t about “that moment of deperation.” It’s about finding and holding on to your true love and other such hackneyed cliches. I don’t think it has much to do with divorce at all. Could she mean she realized she didn’t have what Gosling and McAdams had? Okay, maybe, if you attribute logical thought to Jess. But she also should have figured out that someone wrote their dialogue and they only had to get along for around 40 minutes on screen.

I feel like she should have to wear a shirt that says “I am Stupid.” And it would point to her.

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