Talking About Jared Leto’s Dick Could Get You Sued

Sure, Jared Leto still looks like high school boy Jordan Catalano, despite the fact that more than 20 years have passed since My So-Called Life was on the air, but that doesn’t mean you can just talk about his dick all willy-nilly. His private parts are his alone, and if his lawyer had his way, anyone who dared to speak of Jared’s junk should be sued to the full extend of the law.

From Above The Law:

On Tuesday, Allison S. Hart of Lavely & Singer, the prominent entertainment law firm, sent a letter threatening legal action against Lipstick Alley, a celebrity gossip site featuring message boards where readers dish amongst themselves. On Wednesday, a longtime defender of free speech on the internet, Paul Alan Levy of Public Citizen, sent an awesome response to Hart, smacking down her claims.

Levy’s letter begins with a learned discussion of Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act (my favorite provision in the entire United States Code), which in a nutshell holds website operators not liable for comments posted by their readers (praise the Lord). But this is the real money quote:

Some of the posts of which you object do not appear to me to be defamatory. Two of the posts simply mention claims found elsewhere in the Internet that your client has a large penis. It is hard to see how those statements would hurt your client’s reputation, even if they are false. It is, as I understand it, the accusation of having a small penis that is understood to be an insult.

I mean, I’m not a lawyer, so I don’t really understand the whole defamation thing, but can’t people kinda say what they want within that context? Saying that Jared Leto has a big dick, as Levy points out, literally is an observation/fantasy/whatever. It doesn’t affect what anyone thinks about him in any meaningful way. It’s not like Hollywood casting agencies or concert promoters are going to refuse to hire him because he allegedly has a giant penis. Like, what?