She missed her calling. Her true genius lies in the written word. Responding to reports that she had gastric bypass surgery, Courtney responds, and I quote:
oh perez got it from pge six nd ots bullshit
i couldnt get that suregry iof i begged for it
FDA says you have to have a BMI of above 40 and that equals at least being 100 pounds overweight at least other wsie its ILLEGAL.
I know spmeone who troed to get that shit and no dr would give it to her an dhse was pudgier than i was, its total utter shite, i lost weightthe hard way and people cant accept it,whwnever ANYONE loses weight by determintaion and grit fast its suspect i got muyinspirationf rom Oprah losing so much weight on Slim Fast,. thats how i did it
Now, I got out my 4th Edition Courtney-Love-to-English dictionary, but I still couldn’t piece together all the grammatic constructs, so we had to dig into our Evil Beet budget and hire a translator. Here’s what Courtney said:
Oh, Perez got it from Page Six and it’s bullshit. I couldnt get that suregry if I begged for it. The FDA says you have to have a BMI of above 40, and that equals at least being 100 pounds overweight — at least — otherwise it’s ILLEGAL. I know someone who tried to get that shit and no doctor would give it to her and she was pudgier than I was. It’s total utter shit. I lost weight the hard way and people can’t accept it. Whenever ANYONE loses weight by determination and grit fast it’s suspect. I got my inspiration from Oprah losing so much weight on Slim Fast. That’s how I did it. That and cocaine. Bllaaaaaaaaaargh.
Honestly, Courtney, are you typing in the dark or are you just that high on diet pills? We ran out of cash for the translator, so I’ve included the rest of the entry in Courtneyese after the jump if you want to take a stab at it yourself.
, thio sis nonsesne my breath is great and i dont “vomit inot a towel†it sjust cynical crazy bullshit,
i started weight training three days go to get rid of the saggy ass and loose tummy i pln on hving perrrfect six pack by summer, and be extra strong so when i play shows ill be strong nd not weak,
Thizs is bullshit as is the tummy tuck rumour or the 200k in liopo rumpur ( you dont lose eoght all over from lipo) ( noone loses more than 15 lbs from lipo ever they “resculptâ€) thi sisjust nnoying gross BULLSHIT. from people who cant lose wieght through ld fashioned discipline but dont think for second if it was legal i wouldnt think bout it sure i would but losing ll you rintesines doesnt appeal to me and im ton macro so i dont get cancer ( i kno wthe smnoking hs to go) banding s supposed to up your vchances for colon cancer as well as other terroble health problems,
again this is BULLSHIT. i worked my ss off and m always fucking hingry though ive gotten used to it, bno dr in the world would give me gastric bypass or gastric banding i dont meet the pproval of ny western country , it would be illegal and im[ossible fvor me to find dr to perform this surgery on me.
zso thats THAT.
Jealous Cynical people who anta cceopt that somneone cn lose alot of weight the old fshioned wy ive exercised mya ss off obv iously not enough in my stomach but xdone tons and tons aof cardio, so enough said on this nonsense jealous cynical lie.
good night.
4th Edition Courtney-Love-to-English dictionary?? That one’s outdated baby, no wonder you couldn’t translate what she said. You need the 784th edition which is the latest (so far). See, they publish a new edition everytime she tries a new drug/combo of drugs. Courtneyese is very dynamic.
dur, she is using a machine that when you speak it types for you and that’s why it’s like that. weirdos.
Courtney looks great— and I hope everyone is smart enough to realize that she is not a stupid woman just because she hits a few wrong keys when she types—I love reading her typing, shes so funny, There is nothing boring about her at all, thats why I like her.I’m sure no-one has any room in their life to talk her the way they do.And even if she did get surgery what do you care?,did she ask you to pay for it? And perez has no room to talk about anyone.
Courtney looks great— and I hope everyone is smart enough to realize that she is not a stupid woman just because she hits a few wrong keys when she types—I love reading her typing, shes so funny, There is nothing boring about her at all, thats why I like her.I’m sure no-one has any room in their life to talk about her the way they do.And even if she did get surgery what do you care?,did she ask you to pay for it? And perez has no room to talk about anyone.
courtney love is a stupid bitch. she’s out of control and she needs a tranquilizer… oh wait, i’m sure she’s got plenty.
By the way, ugliestguy, i think i heard something about 785th edition coming out, be sure to pick up your copy.
and someone should shoot perez’s faggoty fat face with a load of elephant juices and scalp that motherfucker!
fuck you courtney, and fuck you perez. you’re both douche bags who need to find a real life, you’re highschool drama queen pieces of shit who should re-enroll in 10th grade and learn to be less scummy.
Leave Courtney Alone!
Leave Courtney alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I AM FROM ARGENTINA. I LOVE YOU COURTNEY, YOU ARE GREAT!! YOU ARE THE ONLY WOMAN THAT I ADMIRE IN THIS WORLD, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT STUPID AS MANY PEOPLE THINK. IT IS EASY YOU ARE SO FANNY AND REALLY BEAUTIFUL.
I think she’s brilliant and her typos are charming :3
She`s asking her friends to write down those complements for her… she`s smart then!…
<3 CL she’s like fit
Please.
Oh god please……
No more Courtney stories.
I can stand Paris, at least she is semi-pleasant to look at. I can stand Nicole Richie, theres entertainment value watching her wrestle with a cheeseburger that is 1/6th her weight.
Courtney’s a black hole. Every time I see her, read about her even think about her, millions of brain cells die in a radical self lobotomy styled attempt to forget. It’s creating serious problems for me.
I saw a picture of Courtney the other day and WHAM, I forgot what keys are made for. They mentioned her name on the radio last month and BOOM, I cant remember what kind of vehicle I own or where it’s parked. I even saw a short story in a magazine while waiting at the doctor’s office and BING I cant remember how to sip from a straw.
Have mercy. No more stories about……
What in the hell is this TV like thing I am typing on?
safe guys,
Courtneys brilliant shes inspired me beyond beleif, i dont care how many drugs she takes, drugs resemble a different world and when you go their its much more freindlier that reality and if your to modest or good to take drugs and see what all the fuss is about, you havent lived life to the max
drugs are a bit exessive
but.. its all part of the MAX
courtney cant type cos shes probably off her face, but she knows what she means, if you can’t understand her then don’t read her shit and complain that her spelling mistakes.
How courtney love can’t spell is obviously a big issue in your life but until to buy her a fucking dictionary..put up with it you clean little spoilt bitches!!
I love you courtney <3 sophhhy xx
FUCK YOU ALL & GET A LIFE, STOP LIVING OTHER PERSON’S LIFES.
FUCK YOU ALL & GET A LIFE, STOP LIVING OTHER PERSON’S LIFES.
I can not beleive any of ya’ll! Cussing her out… I mean she can sometimes be a ugly person and be too skinny and be an idiot and have to many plastic surgery’s but that doesn’t mean that ya’ll should talk about her like that!! I mean, I hate Nick Jonas from the Joans Brothers, but I don’t trash talk him… even if I wanted too!!!!!!
O all you people are bullshit. for all of you that love courtney, great whatever, shes just a person, idolize her if you like. For all you that hate her, same thing. she is just a person and if you care about her great and if you dont great.
she is a person just like anyone else, and if you dont like her dont get soo goddamn heated! just dont pay attention to her if you cant stand her.
You dont have to ruin other people’s days by insulting their idol online. who do you think you are to find a picture of her, and insult her? she is worth soo much more than you whether you like it or not, and to think that your opinion even fucking matters about her is just hilarious.
i hope she keeps living her life the exact way that she goddamn wants, and that all you assholes stop thinking you matter soo goddamn much.
to all those that love courtney, great.
to all those that hate her, same.
but if you think that your opinion matters about her, when you arent buying her cds or getting her autograph, well thats just damn bullshit.
soo hilarious.