I'm a fan of underwear only because it keeps me warm.
---What Amanda said in response to a TMZ cameraman's question on what she thought about 'Les Miserables' co-star Anne Hathaway's upskirt photo. Amanda more or less told us why she, herself, wears underwear, and why her reason might just be Anne's reason because duh, how uncomfortable to be asked about another woman's vaginal habits. You wouldn't make any sense, either. ...
Oh my God, guys, I can't even. I seriously can't stop laughing. I don't know what's worse---Ali Lohan (who does the majority of the singing on the track) trying to to sound like a lost Bone Thug, Lindsay doing the echoes, runs, and harmonies, or the lyrics themselves. Can't bring yourself to actually listen to this song? Here's the lyrics so you can at least have some idea about what I'm busting a gut over:
Let me take you on a Lohan holiday
A winter wonderland that's oh so far away
Don't have to go no where - just let your mind escape
Come on a journey to this Lohan holiday
Imagine if you can - a magical Christmas land fictional journey - a vision so real
A place everybody smiles - wont you come for a while
Lets go in a hurry - come with me you'll see
Imaginations all you really need (lohan holiday)
Let me take you on a Lohan holiday
A winter wonderland that's oh so far away
Don't have to go no where - just let your mind escape
Come on a journey to this Lohan holiday
Such a magical ride - so come on jump inside
A great destination for everyone to see
The wonders in the air can't wait to see you there
Magical moments that you have only dreamed
All you have to do is just believe (lohan holiday)
Let me take you on a Lohan holiday
A winter wonderland that's oh so far away
Don't have to go no where - just let your mind escape
Come on a journey to this Lohan holiday
A Christmas fantasy that's meant for you and me
Where everything you'll ever want is for free just believe (take you there)
Let me take you on a Lohan holiday
A winter wonderland that's oh so far away
Don't have to go no where - just let your mind escape
Come on a journey to this Lohan holiday
Come let me take you on a Lohan holiday
A winter wonderland that's oh so far away
Don't have to go no where - just let your mind escape
I can take you so far away
See, now, I'm picturing all of this snow everywhere, and I don't think it's an accident. I think it's all actually a metaphor for cocaine, because really, what does the Lohan family do super good? They do cocaine super good, friends, and what makes for a whiter Christmas than coke-blown landscapes and good old-fashioned family dysfunction? Nothing, I tell you---not a thing.
Merry Christmas from the Lohans. Yeah, it was a sentiment from 2006, but I like to think that some things just don't change all that much (probably because they don't). />
Oh my God, guys, I can't even. I seriously can't stop laughing. I don't know what's worse---Ali Lohan (who does the majority of the singing on the track) trying to to sound like a lost Bone Thug, Lindsay doing the echoes, runs, and harmonies, or the lyrics themselves. Can't bring yourself to actually listen to this song? Here's the lyrics so you can at least have some idea about what I'm busting a gut over:
Let me take you on a Lohan holiday
A winter wonderland that's oh so far away
Don't h...
It's good. I like it. But damn, guys. Ke$ha's one of those chicks who you can never really tell whether or not she's totally hot or totally trying too hard, but the more I hear about Ke$ha, the more I ... wait, did you guys actually think I was going to say "the more I like her music"? Because gosh, hell no. Ke$ha's music is complete crap, but she just might be a delightful lady to hang out and drink chai tea or something with. "The more I think like her" is what I was actually going to say.
...
If you've ever wondered what Mary-Kate Olsen was like outside of designing pill bags and killing Heath Ledger (yeah, I know, old news, that is, wearing it out and all that), this is it. This is what Mary-Kate does in all of her spare time---kiss men who could be her father at basketball games. Honestly, I'm not even sure she goes anywhere other than those damn basketball games, and judging by the ever-tousled state of her hair, she definitely doesn't go anywhere near places that have a brush.
Isn't love so cut...
But it's OK, really, because Lindsay's wearing that mad sweet eye makeup that tries to detract from the fact that her pupils don't even exist anymore, so who's really paying any attention to her lips whatsoever?
Truth be told, I am. It looks like they're bursting at the seams. It looks like there's even a part cracking and flaking off up near the corner of her mouth. Truth be told, it looks like Lindsay's got shit on her lip that's got shit on its lip. But alas, this is Lindsay Lohan today...
Three hints!
---It's not Kim Kardashian.
---It's not Pam Anderson.
---It's definitely not who you think.
Jump in to find out who this righteous set of tits belongs to!
Read More...
This is Justin Bieber performing at the Jingle Bell Ball, and since pretty much everything has been about junk lately (i.e., the Bell Ball, Justin's balls being removed), I figured it was probably appropriate to go ahead and post this here photo, which appears to showcase a item protruding from somewhere in in the region of Justin Bieber's alleged genitals.
Honestly speaking, I don't know what it is and neither do you. So let's just go ahead and pretend it's a big, giant (OK, average-ish) erection, because that's just going to make watching him perform so much better....
This isn't even a joke, this is actually happening. Lifetime, our favorite network, decided that they wanted to adapt Pride and Prejudice into a television show. The show will be called Darcy's Town, and it will be set in the present day. In Virginia. Natch.
But Jennifer Love Hewitt isn't going to be featured onscreen - at least, there's no word right now that she will be - but she'll be working as the executive producer. It's also going to be written by the woman who wrote Charmed.
You ca...
"I never denied those rumors because I was offended and didn’t want to offend my friends who were gay—as if being gay were some kind of f-cking disease. It put me in a weird position in that sense. The whole thing was just gross. But look, there have been great signs of progress—the fact that Anderson Cooper and Ellen DeGeneres can come out so beautifully and powerfully, and it’s a big f-cking deal that it turns out nobody gives a shit. If Liberace were alive today, everybody would love his music ...
"Shower curtain" might be a little harsh. [The Superficial]
Jessica Simpson will be getting married in Hawaii soon. [Cele|bitchy]
That's funny, I actually heard 'The Hobbit' quite sucked. [Starpulse]
10 Best Holiday Fudge Recipes. [The Frisky]
The hospital might be to blame for the British nurse's suicide. [TMZ]
Matt Damon goes nude and gay. [Socialite Life]
Paul McCartney fronted Nirvana with Dave Grohl. [The Blemish]
Shirtless Friday. [theBERRY]
Consequence that Lindsay Lohan might actually face, maybe. [Celebslam]
Luke has a magic sack. [OMGBlog]
...
It was a cold morning
But I was still waiting for snow
My mommy woke me up this morning
Made me breakfast
Even made me my favorite
Hot chocolate
With marshmallows on top.
The ride to school was fun
Mommy playing my favorite songs on the radio
I love Christmas songs
Especially the ones about Baby Jesus
I love Baby Jesus
With a kiss and a big hug (My mom always gives me the best hugs)
I headed off to school
But not before she told me
I love you
And that when I got home
I had crayons to put away
I always leave them around the house
Someone new is here today
Some man I have never seen before
With a funny jacket
I didn't say hi to him
Because mommy told me never to talk to strangers
It feels warm now
I see a different man
He's dressed all in white
Like that guy from the movie my dad took me to see
He reaches out for me
I'm crying
I miss my mommy
But he wraps me in a hug just like she does
I cry all down his robe
He takes me away to this beautiful place
One with fluffy clouds and a golden palace
It's so beautiful here
But I can't help but wonder
Why can't I go home
To put away my crayons?
He calls me his child
And shows me what is happening
And for the first time ever I realize
This man reminds me of Baby Jesus
The same one from those songs I love
And we're crying, together.
From the clouds he shows me my mommy and daddy
He shows me my brother
He shows me the whole world
Crying for us
All 18 of us
This man, who calls himself God
Tells me not to worry about the crayons
That mommy likes them just the way they are
And that I can go see her
Whenever I want.
Why do I feel warm in my stomach?
I ask this man called God
And with a smile
He takes my hand
Kisses it
And says
"That was me, warming your heart, little one."
"That was me, taking you home, and making you even more special than you are to your mommy."
I miss you mommy
But it's so nice here
I hope some day this message meets you
As you sit at home
Looking at all my pictures
I promise one day I'll pick up my crayons
But until then, this wonderful man knows what he's talking about
When he says you like them there.
This poem was written by my wonderfully talented friend, Nick DeMarco. You can reach him on Facebook if you'd like. />It was a cold morning
But I was still waiting for snow
My mommy woke me up this morning
Made me breakfast
Even made me my favorite
Hot chocolate
With marshmallows on top.
The ride to school was fun
Mommy playing my favorite songs on the radio
I love Christmas songs
Especially the ones about Baby Jesus
I love Baby Jesus
With a kiss and a big hug (My mom always gives me the best hugs)
I headed off to school
But not before she told me
I love you
And that when I got home
I had crayons...
Oh my goodness. I was going to open this whole thing up by pronouncing my undying love for Amanda Seyfried, but I can't, because that dress. That dress is so, so amazing. I think I'm so blown away because it's something that Taylor Swift would wear, but I hate Taylor Swift*, so it feels good that a celebrity I love is wearing a dress that cute. Does that make sense? LOOK AT THE DRESS.
But yeah, guys, I really do love this girl. I think she's so weirdly endearing, and obviously she's a...
I'm a fan of underwear only because it keeps me warm.
---What Amanda said in response to a TMZ cameraman's question on what she thought about 'Les Miserables' co-star Anne Hathaway's upskirt photo. Amanda more or less told us why she, herself, wears underwear, and why her reason might just be Anne's reason because duh, how uncomfortable to be asked about another woman's vaginal habits. You wouldn't make any sense, either. ...
It's good. I like it. But damn, guys. Ke$ha's one of those chicks who you can never really tell whether or not she's totally hot or totally trying too hard, but the more I hear about Ke$ha, the more I ... wait, did you guys actually think I was going to say "the more I like her music"? Because gosh, hell no. Ke$ha's music is complete crap, but she just might be a delightful lady to hang out and drink chai tea or something with. "The more I think like her" is what I was actually going to say.
...
If you've ever wondered what Mary-Kate Olsen was like outside of designing pill bags and killing Heath Ledger (yeah, I know, old news, that is, wearing it out and all that), this is it. This is what Mary-Kate does in all of her spare time---kiss men who could be her father at basketball games. Honestly, I'm not even sure she goes anywhere other than those damn basketball games, and judging by the ever-tousled state of her hair, she definitely doesn't go anywhere near places that have a brush.
Isn't love so cut...
But it's OK, really, because Lindsay's wearing that mad sweet eye makeup that tries to detract from the fact that her pupils don't even exist anymore, so who's really paying any attention to her lips whatsoever?
Truth be told, I am. It looks like they're bursting at the seams. It looks like there's even a part cracking and flaking off up near the corner of her mouth. Truth be told, it looks like Lindsay's got shit on her lip that's got shit on its lip. But alas, this is Lindsay Lohan today...
Three hints!
---It's not Kim Kardashian.
---It's not Pam Anderson.
---It's definitely not who you think.
Jump in to find out who this righteous set of tits belongs to!
Read More...
This is Justin Bieber performing at the Jingle Bell Ball, and since pretty much everything has been about junk lately (i.e., the Bell Ball, Justin's balls being removed), I figured it was probably appropriate to go ahead and post this here photo, which appears to showcase a item protruding from somewhere in in the region of Justin Bieber's alleged genitals.
Honestly speaking, I don't know what it is and neither do you. So let's just go ahead and pretend it's a big, giant (OK, average-ish) erection, because that's just going to make watching him perform so much better....
This isn't even a joke, this is actually happening. Lifetime, our favorite network, decided that they wanted to adapt Pride and Prejudice into a television show. The show will be called Darcy's Town, and it will be set in the present day. In Virginia. Natch.
But Jennifer Love Hewitt isn't going to be featured onscreen - at least, there's no word right now that she will be - but she'll be working as the executive producer. It's also going to be written by the woman who wrote Charmed.
You ca...
"I never denied those rumors because I was offended and didn’t want to offend my friends who were gay—as if being gay were some kind of f-cking disease. It put me in a weird position in that sense. The whole thing was just gross. But look, there have been great signs of progress—the fact that Anderson Cooper and Ellen DeGeneres can come out so beautifully and powerfully, and it’s a big f-cking deal that it turns out nobody gives a shit. If Liberace were alive today, everybody would love his music ...
"Shower curtain" might be a little harsh. [The Superficial]
Jessica Simpson will be getting married in Hawaii soon. [Cele|bitchy]
That's funny, I actually heard 'The Hobbit' quite sucked. [Starpulse]
10 Best Holiday Fudge Recipes. [The Frisky]
The hospital might be to blame for the British nurse's suicide. [TMZ]
Matt Damon goes nude and gay. [Socialite Life]
Paul McCartney fronted Nirvana with Dave Grohl. [The Blemish]
Shirtless Friday. [theBERRY]
Consequence that Lindsay Lohan might actually face, maybe. [Celebslam]
Luke has a magic sack. [OMGBlog]
...
Oh my goodness. I was going to open this whole thing up by pronouncing my undying love for Amanda Seyfried, but I can't, because that dress. That dress is so, so amazing. I think I'm so blown away because it's something that Taylor Swift would wear, but I hate Taylor Swift*, so it feels good that a celebrity I love is wearing a dress that cute. Does that make sense? LOOK AT THE DRESS.
But yeah, guys, I really do love this girl. I think she's so weirdly endearing, and obviously she's a...