Oh, sorry, he gets placenta and gold rubbed on his face all the time. Sheep placenta, specifically. Well, New Zealand sheep placenta, if we’re getting really specific. New Zealand sheep placenta mixed with 24 carat gold flakes, rubbed directly onto his face. Regularly. Like you do.
From The Mirror:
Now, in his ongoing quest to stave off the ravishes of time, the X Factor mogul is playing dirty… and getting regular sheep placenta facials.
So convinced is he by the skin-rejuvenating properties of livestock afterbirth, Si, 52, has become a devotee of the £330 treatment.
The facial is carried out at the Beverly Hills Lancer dermatology clinic – as, reportedly, frequented by Victoria Beckham. A therapist applies the stem cells from special, New Zealand-reared sheep, which is then spread over Si’s lovely, smooth, Botoxed face.
Before this, Simon’s mug is given a thorough 30-minute exfoliation and beamed with an LED light to open up his pores. From here, the sheepy stuff is smeared on in a gel mixed with 24 carat gold flakes. Finally, a “galvanised metal probe” is prodded over the skin to ensure the product penetrates deeply. Lovely.
Lancer therapist, Linda, let slip Cowell’s secret on ITV1’s Lorraine, enthusiastically adding: “He loves it!” So much for client confidentiality, then.
Yesterday a source close to sexy Si said: “Simon is forever trawling the health and beauty market, looking for all the latest fads. He’s tried vitamin injections, drips, detoxes, smoothies, Botox and massages, but after reading rave reviews about placenta facials, decided he had to give them a go. He reckons they take years off his complexion, and give him back the shine and joie de vivre long hours and smoking take away.”
Happily, Dr Lancer himself, is keen to stress the animal-friendly nature of, well, animal-loving Simon.
Of the process, he says: “These sheep are completely untouched by the modern world. It is very important they have no impurities. The stem cells are full of rich nutrients and the cells we harvest are amniotic, which means no harm is caused to the animals.”
You know what’s less weird, time consuming, and expensive than rubbing sheep placenta and gold flakes all over your face? Just letting your skin do its thing. I know, it’s a strange idea, and Simon would never listen to it, but it’s an option, you know? Sheep placenta is not the only answer.
I try to solve most of my problems with placentas. It must be a Simon thing.
“completely untouched by the modern world” except, you know, the rearing in a sterile environment in a barn that probably more closely mimics a lab. Don’t act like they’re going out and plucking the passed placentas off the ground of a picturesque pasture. Also if it’s placenta it’s not amniotic. Oh well, it all sounds real nice. The things people tell themselves….stimulates the economy, I suppose.
‘Completely untouched by the modern world?’ Um, I’m from NZ and I can confirm that we’re not THAT far behind everyone else…
That explains the Gollum-looking pile of fug that he is.
Too true.