Today's Evil Beet Gossip

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photo of joseph gordon-levitt pictures hot pic It's because the girls like Ashton Kutcher better, isn't it? [The Superficial] Fatmire's going to court with Kim Kardashian! Yay! [Bitten and Bound] Amy Varela has a message for cheater Robin Thicke. [Celebrity VIP Lounge] Tony Parker offered half-a-mil to referee fight between Drake and Chris Brown. [Starpulse] Rihanna's new Tweets say she's f-cking Drake now. [Socialite Life] PHOTOS: Madonna's flashing her nipples again. Sigh. [Celebslam] Adrianne Curry skanks up Comic Con. [Yeee...

Quotables: Casper Smart Doesn’t Need to Marry Jennifer Lopez

photo of casper smart pictures photos (I mean, har har har, why bother buying the cow when you're getting the milk and all of its jewels and money and cars and BLING for free?) “You see, for me, marriage is not – I think Jennifer and I see it differently when it comes to that, which I totally respect her opinion, but I don’t think you need to be married to someone." Oh man. Man. I am rolling around on the f-cking floor over here right now. This bitch has the nerve to publicly talk shit on Jennifer's marriage convictions...

PHOTOS: Is Miley Cyrus Cutting, Vol. II

photo of miley cyrus cutting pictures First, I realize that these photos are "old" in that they were taken pre-blonde Miley, but they're still recent within the last two weeks, so please allow me to clarify that. Second, I just don't even know. Are these cutting marks? Do they look like self-inflicted cutting scars, or do you think maybe, optimistically, that they're scratches from new new puppies? In the first set of Miley Cyrus Cutting Photos, some of you guys commented that maybe the markings were made by a dog leash she was h...

Are Demi Moore’s Daughters Getting a Restraining Order Against Their Mom?

photo of demi moore pictures One would think that in the wake of some pretty serious public family drama that one (or a few) wouldn't be so keen to ax off a member of your family (especially a other), but then, one (or a few) would need more than three brain cells a piece to draw the conclusion that pettiness sometimes has adverse effects, then finding out someone's gone forever and after that, nothing changes. God. Some people are just so stupid. A new report says that Demi's three daughters, Rumer, Tallulah, and Scout, are...

Sage Stallone’s Mom is Throwing Around Ideas as to Why Her Son Died

photo of stallones pictures Sasha Czack has finally broken her silence as to why she thinks her son, Sage, overdosed on medication, which resulted in an accidental death. From the NY Post: The 36-year-old son of “Rocky” icon Sylvester Stallone had five teeth pulled two weeks before he was found dead in his Los Angeles home, said heartbroken mom Sasha Czack in her first public comments about the tragedy. She said she warned him against the procedure, but he went ahead with it anyway. “I told him not to do that. I’ve heard about people dying having multiple procedures done to your mouth. Do not have more than one t...

Lady Gaga’s Got the Scariest Perfume Ad Ever.

photo of lady gaga perfume ad pictures Seriously, is this not one of the most disturbing visuals you've ever experienced in your life? Because for me, it is. It really, really is. All of the little people hanging off of her like gangly leeches? It's the stuff that nightmares are made of, and that's entirely aside from the fact that Lady Gaga's all stripped down, save for the Batman-or-Catwoman mask she's wearing. The fragrance claims its the "... first ever black Eau de Parfum ever," which, roughly translated, means that it's g...

Scientology Probably Made an Attempt on Katie’s Life Already

photo of mercedes limo katie holmes car accident pictures Apparently Katie and Suri's limo was hit by a "garbage truck," but we all know that Scientology knows no labels; it's ever-present. The official report says that the limo was struck by a sanitation vehicle last night in New York City, but we're not stupid, folks, and there's never anything "official" when it comes to psychoses aside from the fact that Tom Cruise is officially psychotic. From TMZ: Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise got trashed last night -- their Mercedes-Benz limousine was s...

Trace Cyrus Has a New Video Out!

GUYS. This is easily the most awkward thing I've ever seen in my entire life. Seriously. I cringed through 99% of it, and the other 1% I was putting Octonauts on for my daughter (which, I'll admit to watching). Look for a Miley cameo, and a jacuzzi tub shot of a girl with really, really, really big tits starting to float on her back toward Trace, and lots of hugging and kissing, because this video's chock-full of it. The thing about this, though, that I'm hearing is that Trace's "band," Ashland High, has got a pretty OK following. Meaning that there are people out there who listen to this and say, "Hey. Now that's a song I can get behind," but don't get me wrong---all is not a waste. I love the upbeat idea of "sippin' on sunshine" way way more than I'd like, say, something like "I hate my life and I want to drown myself in this nice big pool I have and curse my life and all of the things in it like my gold Rolex watch and famous family." Because guys, that's the truth. I'd rate this a 7 on a scale from 1 to 10, and it's only, only, only because---all snark aside---the concept for the video is actually really cute and endearing. /> GUYS. This is easily the most awkward thing I've ever seen in my entire life. Seriously. I cringed through 99% of it, and the other 1% I was putting Octonauts on for my daughter (which, I'll admit to watching). Look for a Miley cameo, and a jacuzzi tub shot of a girl with really, really, really big tits starting to float on her back toward Trace, and lots of hugging and kissing, because this video's chock-full of it. The thing about this, though, that I'm hearing is that Trace's "band," ...

Justin Bieber Is Wasting His Penis on Selena Gomez

A photo of Justin Bieber Poor, poor Justin Bieber. Sure, he's a superstar, the new King of Pop, even, but he's still an 18-year-old boy. We may know him as the best boyfriend ever, but he still has urges, and he still has needs that even his beloved Selena Gomez can't satisfy. Yes, we're about to talk about Justin Bieber's sex life. Strap yourselves in, friends. It's about to get ugly. From Us Weekly via Celebitchy: Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber are struggling to hold on to each other. Bieber, 18, has spent t...

Report: Sylvester Stallone Had Cut Son Sage From His Life

photo of sylvester stallone son wife pictures Allow the family drama to commence. The latest report comes from Stallone cousin, Edd Filiti (and no, I don't know why he spells Ed with two 'd's either), who says that Sage and his father had experienced some kind of falling out in the weeks prior to Sage's untimely death, and that contact was made via Facebook to Sylvester's current wife, Jennifer Flavin. From Celebuzz: The son of Sylvestor Stallone was “depressed” in the days before his death because his Hollywood superstar father hadn...

Oh So Marilyn Manson Wants a Kid Now, Too

photo of marilyn manson wants a baby pictures GUYS. Brace yourselves, OK? Brace. yourselves. From the UK's Observer: "My girlfriend Lindsay's twin just had a baby and I've started to think that maybe I wouldn't mind passing my demented genius on to some small thing who can set fire and breathe profanity." And there were, of course, other parts to the interview that were much, much less scary (example: "My body is a place where drugs and alcohol have made germs afraid to live. I have no health problems to speak of, touch wood," ...