Do You Want to Work for Courtney Love?

Let me just answer that question for you real quick: f-ck no, you do not want to work for Courtney Love. And if for some strange reason you do want to work for Courtney Love, then please just take a moment to reevaluate your entire life. And after that, never work for Courtney Love.

Listen, we all know that she’s crazy. It’s not a secret, it’s not a surprise. Courtney is wacked, and that extends to all areas of her life. If you don’t believe that, then check this out: she’s getting sued by her former assistant, Jessica LaBrie. But why? Many reasons!

– Courtney wanted her to hire a computer hacker.

– Courtney also wanted her to forge some legal documents.

– Jessica was hired as an assistant and also a “forensic research aide,” which sounds totally legit. She was supposed to be paid $30 an hour, and Courtney made her work 60-hour weeks with no overtime. Bitch.

– Courtney promised to pay Jessica’s college tuition, but she never did *frowny face*.

– Another empty promise: Courtney told her that she’d get her a job on the set of Nirvana biopic.

Poor Jessica. She worked for Courtney for 13 months before she quit, and now she’s officially suing her for “alleged wrongful termination, failure to pay wages and overtime, negligent misrepresentation, breach of contract and intentional infliction of emotional distress.” The wrongful termination part seems weird, because she definitely quit. Maybe you can sue someone for wrongful termination if you don’t get paid? I don’t know. All I do know, really, is that I’m impressed by and suspicious of this Jessica character. Good for her for making it a whole year as Courtney’s assistant, but how did she expect it to turn out?

I’ll answer that last question for you too: she probably expected it to turn out great for her, because she’s releasing a tell-all about Courtney that’s charmingly titled Get Me A Xanax. Whatever works, I guess.