I’m starting to think that the amount of time I spend thinking about Snooki‘s child might not be normal. I came to this realization a few days ago when I was out to dinner with my boyfriend. I was rambling on and on about Snooki’s due date and how she’s going to have a little boy who she’ll probably name Lorenzo and she hasn’t seemed like herself during her pregnancy, but that could just be the lack of booze, and then I stopped because I realized that I was talking about Snooki like she’s my BFF. Have any of you guys had that experience?
But Snooki was on Good Morning America yesterday, which means that tonight at dinner I’ll have lots to talk about! Here are a couple of quotes so that you guys can have some good conversation starters as well:
Lorenzo it is: “I think we’re going to do ‘Lorenzo. Because then you can call him ‘Enzo.”
On bars and drinking: “Pregnant people shouldn’t be in a bar. All my friends are like, ‘you can have a glass of wine.’ I’m like, ‘No.’ I refuse because I’m going to be that person that has a glass of wine and [the] baby comes out with three legs.”
She also said that she plans on showing little Enzo episodes of Jersey Shore and telling him “This is what mommy did. Learn from her mistakes.” Poor, poor Enzo. He’s never going to be mentally equipped to see his mom do the things that Snooki does on that show. Remember that first time that she and Vinny fooled around? They tried to have sex, but Snooki said that it was like “trying to fit a watermelon into a pinhole.” And then there was the time that she told everyone that she got a UTI from anal sex. Oh, and then there was that time that she and Jionni had that awful, horrible, terrible fight in Italy. That would be great for their kid to watch, right?
She’s the reason why animals eat their youngs,
I love how she’s like “pregnant people shouldn’t be in a bar” because you shouldn’t even have *one* glass of wine! Because, you know, no one could go to a bar to hang out with friends without drinking. That’s just silly, right? Except that quite a few of my pregnant female friends do it – they can still do karaoke and play pool, but they drink Sprite instead of anything alcoholic.