Lindsay Did It!

What is the “it” that Lindsay Lohan did exactly? So many things! She got off probation! She managed to wear a decent outfit to court! She got chastised by Dr. Drew! There’s a lot to talk about, but let’s just go in order, all right?

First, here’s some of what Lindsay’s judge had to say to her in their last courtroom meeting ever (hopefully):

“She did it,” Judge Stephanie Sautner said at the start of the lightning-quick hearing.

“Ms. Lohan has done everything she was ordered to do…probation terminates today. Now,” Sautner said to an audible sigh of relief from LiLo.

“She was given one year to complete it all and she has completed it short of a year, and she has done everything that this court has asked of her. You’ve paid all your fees, paid more than you should’ve, but that’s between you and [the probation department],” Sautner told Lohan, adding jokingly, “I wouldn’t go asking for a refund.”

And while Sautner told Lindsay she was “not going to give you a lecture,” she nevertheless humored herself with a small imparting of wisdom.

“The only terms left for you on that case are to obey all laws. It’s not that hard. I know it’s kind of hard when people are following you around all the time, but that’s the life you chose,” she said.

“I’m not going to give you a lecture. Live your life in a more mature way, stop the nightclubbing and focus on your work, OK?”

Before formally parting ways, both Lohan and her attorney, Shawn Holley, thanked the court.

“I just want to say thank you, Your Honor, for being fair, and it’s really opened a lot of doors for me, so I really appreciate it,” Lindsay said.

“I don’t expect to see you again,” Sautner told her. “You know what you have to do.”

That’s sweet, right? My favorite was when the judge was like “obey all laws, it’s not that hard.” Favorite judge ever.

Now let’s talk about Lindsay’s outfit. You guys know how I like to talk about her courtroom ensembles, and I think this little suit is one of the best ones she’s had. Sure, it looks like she’s still not wearing a bra, which seems like an odd choice for court, and yeah, the cut of the suit might be a bit off (why are her pants that short? Is that a style? I don’t like it), but looking back on her other choices, I think she did a fine job today.

And now finally we have Dr. Drew popping up to throw in his two cents about Lindsay’s sobriety, particularly concerning her recent acting gigs:

“If she’s not going to take her sobriety seriously, then she may as well take a job. At least she’s being productive and doing something besides partying. It’s incredible that she can handle it and pull it off. I wish her luck. The sad thing is that when she is finally ready to take her sobriety seriously and get clean, then it will be too late for her and her career will be completely over. That will be sad for her.”

I usually really like Dr. Drew, but this just seems like a bitchy thing to say. Like “yeah, all this hard work you’ve done doesn’t mean shit, you’ve already failed.” I know we like to give her a hard time around here and she’s still got some shady things surrounding her, but let’s just let her have her special day, all right?