I like Carrie Underwood. Seriously, I really do. I’m not a huge fan of the whole country thing, but I think she’s a really sweet girl, I love her story, I love that she’s probably the most famous American Idol ever (and ever will be), and I think she’s genuinely a good, positive role model for little girls growing up with a media that constantly tells them that they’re not good enough. Carrie Underwood is awesome, OK?
But I read an interview that she recently did with Self magazine, and I have to say – it was corny as all hell. I was able to appreciate it for its good-heartedness and its truth, but there was deep-down feminist part of me that kind of cringed when I read the things she likes to do to make her husband happy, and the things she seeks to reaffirm that she’s the bees knees.
Shall I go on?
From Self, what she had to say about dressing to please her husband – and no one else:
“I get texts from Mike when I’m on a red carpet that read ‘You’re so hot!’ I like that. Words of affirmation mean a lot to me. But my husband is also pretty conservative. When I’m wearing some outfits, he’ll say, ‘That dress is a little short, don’t ya think?’ He would never tell me I can’t do or wear something or make me feel bad, but I’m a married lady now, so I try to be respectful of my husband. I want to look sexy for him, and I appreciate that he wants to look nice for me, too.”
So, alright. I get that it’s “nice” she wants to look “nice” for her husband, and I’m just so sure he feels the same about her. I have no doubts that he likes to look “nice” for her, “too.” Oh, “sorry.” Did I get “carried away” with the “quotes”? My “bad.” But you know what’s also nice? Looking nice for yourself before looking nice for anyone else. And someone appreciating you for what you look like even when you know you look like hot garbage on a humid day. That’s cool as well.
I’m not saying that Carrie’s husband gets carried away with his machismo role as husband (“That dress is a little short, don’t ya think?”), but I am saying that maybe Carrie just shouldn’t, you know … try so hard, I suppose.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to please one’s husband or being respectful of him (especially if he repays it tenfold!). As much as modern society is all about “be yourself! Please yourself first and no one else!” etc., the truth is that life runs a lot more smoothly (and happily, in my opinion) if you DO take into account what other people feel (especially those close to you), which involves caring when they’re happy. This doesn’t mean you lose yourself entirely, and maybe you still end up doing what you want after all, but there’s nothing wrong with admitting what Carrie just admitted. Plus she didn’t say she *doesn’t* get affirmation from herself first, she just happened to say – while she’s talking about her husband – that she gets it from her husband.
Hooray! I agree with your post 100 percent!
“That dress is a little short, don’t you think?”. “Why, yes, it is, it’s short and I look bangin’ in it, thank you and good night”.
Childish article. Grow up!
I have been married for 38 years and I get what she is saying . You really do want to look good to please your spouse, but that does not mean you don’t please yourself. You can do both! I want my husband to look nice because he wants to as well when we go out. Marriage is a two way street. Dressing nice for each other is a small thing to do but really makes you feel good that you please someone besided yourself. It’s also nice to have your other half complement you as well. We all like complements.
I KNOW how Carrie feels. She and I both are newlyweds—and we want to look good for our new husband and it it great that my new hubby also wants to look good for me too. It is NOT about anything else but loving your spouse and wanting to please. That is what newlyweds do. Maybe years down the road it will change but I hope not. I think Carrie is a sweet, kind, caring person and a good role model.
I just wanted to add that Carrie did not live with Mike before they were married and I did not live with my husband before we were married. I guess we are both old fashioned in thinking that we wanted to be married first. Carrie dated a couple of years before marriage and I dated 2 years before marrying. We are new to the marriage thing and considering another person’s feelings, tastes, etc. is the normal thing to do in my world and it seems as it is so in Carrie’s world also. It is called consideration and respect….
Sarah, congratulations – you just wrote an entire article about the fact that Carrie Underwood likes to look good for her husband – this is really shocking news!
I don’t think you’re in line for a pulitzer prize anytime soon!
LOL!
Evil Beet used to be the BIZNEZ! Not it just sucks.