Lindsay Totally Didn’t Know About All That Tax Nonsense

A couple of days ago, I let you guys know that good ol’ Lindsay Lohan was behind on her taxes. Specifically, she never paid anything for 2009. At the time, it seemed to be just another one of Lindsay’s crackhead mistakes, but listen: it’s not. It’s not Lindsay’s fault at all. She had no idea about any of this because someone was supposed to take care of this for her.

From TMZ:

Lindsay Lohan had no idea she was so deeply in the hole to Uncle Sam … because she THOUGHT she had accountants to take care of that crap for her … sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ.

TMZ broke the story … the I.R.S. hit Lohan with a big, fat tax lien, claiming she failed to fork over $93k in federal income taxes from 2009.

Now, sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ she was completely unaware of the problem. We’re told Lindsay actually cleaned house recently and replaced most of her business team.

Our sources say Lindsay believes the debt was most likely lost in the shuffle, but the issue will be handled immediately.

Ok, I’m not proud to admit this, but I would totally pull the same move if I were in Lindsay’s shoes. See, my natural voice sounds like the voice of little girl, so much so that when I order a pizza people ask “ok, sweetie, can you give the phone to your mommy now so I can get your address?” and when I moved into my new apartment, the internet service called to confirm my appointment time and said “now you make sure that a grown-up is there when we come to see you, all right?” I also look a bit younger than I really am (because 23 is sooo old anyway, right?), and both of these things together mean that people treat me like a child. It’s really annoying sometimes, but in some situations it is so handy when I need to get out of something. One of my catchphrases should be “oh, I didn’t know I couldn’t do that.” So I get Lindsay here.

But here’s the thing: I’m not a crackhead. And that’s a very important distinction. When I say “I totally didn’t know about this!” when of course I knew about it, it’s over something tiny. It’s not about $93,000 I “toooootally forgot about” in taxes. And that’s the difference between me and Lindsay: I use white lies, she uses meth lies.

Does anybody else use that handy little tactic though? Or will you? I’m here to serve you, friends!