DOOD. This just gets better and better, now, doesn’t it?
Ali and her “spider-like limbs”:
Sitting down for a chat, Aliana is polite, sweet and, for the first 20 minutes, guarded. She’s wearing a conservatively chic ensemble of light gray American Apparel pants, a black sleeveless American Apparel blouse buttoned all the way up to her neck and vintage black Chloe booties. (“I love the ’50s. That’s my style,” she says in the trademark Lohan rasp. “I just think it’s really beautiful how they didn’t show as much skin back then.”) Her long, dark brown hair is parted in the middle. She’s five foot eight, and her spiderlike limbs seem to go on for yards, making her look at least five inches taller.
On the woman who’s supposed to be her mother:
“Yeah, she has gotten a bad rap,” Aliana says. “People don’t really know what has gone on. It upsets me sometimes when I see stuff that’s the complete opposite of the truth. I don’t listen to the negative stuff. I just try to take the positive. I don’t go on blogs. Noooo, noooo, noooo, noooo,” she continues, shaking her head emphatically. “It’s so much less stressful if you’re not dealing with that stuff. I mean, obviously you [might] hear something from someone…but I just let it roll right off my shoulders. I don’t validate it. I’m just like, yeah, whatever. I know I’m fine. Everything’s great. I don’t need to prove anything to anyone who’s making up stupid stuff. I don’t get it. I would never do that, so I don’t know how someone could be that mean.”
On finishing high school:
This month Aliana will not only turn 18 but will also graduate from high school early. “I get three or four months extra to be free,” says the Criminal Minds fan, who, if she goes to university, would choose Ithaca College, like her older brother Michael, 23, and study “how to profile serial killers or something cool like that. I am taking one step at a time,” she continues. “I will focus on [school] when I get to it.”
The full details on the plastic surgery:
“Oh my gosh, that’s so funny,” she says. But she doesn’t mean funny ha-ha. “I mean, I heard it from one of my friends, and I was kind of like, ‘Why are you my friend? Because I shouldn’t be hearing this. If you’re my friend you wouldn’t even talk about that stuff.’ ” She leans in close and gets almost too quiet to hear. Again, her eyes glance around the room cautiously before she continues. “When they did tell me, I was cracking up. Because, like, when would I do that? I’m 17 years old. That’s not legal! I would need my mother’s signature, and do you think my mom would ever sign off on that? No! It’s not the right thing to do. I mean, if you wanted to, that’s great, for anyone else. I know a girl who had a nose job in seventh grade, which is craaaazy. In seventh grade! I think that’s more of, like, the mom’s decision, not the kid’s. But I don’t know. It’s stupid. I don’t listen to it. It’s absolutely not true.”
On being “naturally” skinny:
She says she’s “always had a fast metabolism” and is able to eat what she wants, from scrambled eggs with American cheese and hot sauce to Nutella. “I can just eat [it] out of the jar with a glass of milk,” she confesses.
On Lindsay:
When she’s in L.A., Aliana stays with Lindsay. “We’re extremely close,” she says, lowering her voice again to a barely audible whisper. “It’s just, you can’t, like, trust anyone, so we talk to each other about everything. All of us do. It’s always been that way.” When they’re both in L.A., the sisters cook big Sunday night dinners. “She makes the best angel-hair pasta with vodka sauce and shrimp,” Aliana says. “I admire how strong she is,” Aliana says. “She’s an independent woman, which I respect so much. She doesn’t listen to any of [the rumors], either. Like, someone will tell her something, and she’ll be like, ‘Wait, what?’ You can’t listen to it because it’s like, you’ll want to have to fix everything, right? And it’s like, once you fix something, someone else is gonna say something bad. It’s never-ending.”
On being the polar opposite of Lindsay:
“No! Oh, god, no!” Aliana says when asked if she has a fake ID. “Noooo. I don’t go out at all. Honestly. Have I ever drank? No. You can ask any of my friends. I’ve never drank.” Smoked? “Noooo!” She looks horrified. “I just want people to know, that’s a no. I mean, my sister smokes cigarettes, but I don’t even like to be around [it]. The smell grosses me out. I like fresh air and nice candles. I don’t like smoke or anything.”
HAHA! Of course Lindsay would make a fabulous vodka sauce. Would you expect anything else? But seriously, for the love of God, I don’t want to like this girl. I don’t. And it’s because she’s a Lohan. Is that fair? Well, no, probably not. But I’ve had my heart broken by a Lohan before, and I’m not about to allow another scrawny, raspy-voiced chick into my heart no matter how neat they seem to be. Nope, not just yet.