While performing at the Nashville Pride Festival on Saturday, Vanessa Carlton decided to tell her audience of around 18,000 a secret:
“I’ve never said this before, but I am a proud bisexual woman.”
After that announcement and before “Ordinary Day,” she said the song “could be about a boy, girl, tranny, whatever,” then sang the song using female pronouns instead of the usual male ones.
I say good on you, Vanessa Carlton. In a culture where being bisexual is largely considered being indecisive or just plain slutty (or if you’re a celebrity, a publicity stunt), it takes some courage to do what Vanessa did. I mean, a pride festival is probably a pretty good place to come out, but I’ve had to have read at least a dozen articles that make Anna Paquin jokes and hilariously speculate about a guest star role for Vanessa on True Blood. Naturally, another popular comment is that Vanessa is just trying to generate some interest in her music.
Why’s it have to be about something, you guys? Why can’t a girl just be bisexual?
exactly..why cant people understand that bisexuality truly exist?
Sadly at the moment, being bisexual means rejection, misunderstanding, misinformation, and outright discrimination, not only from many members of the straight community, but also from many in the gay and lesbian community as well.
Hopefully as more and more bisexual people (both women and men) take the brave step of coming out it will become a bit more of a non-issue. Bisexuality is real. We are not “sluts” or “greedy” or “confused” we are people gifted (imho) with the ability to see beauty in and share love with both women and men.
I am proud to say I am a bisexual woman.
I am sooo sick of the i'm bisexual, i'm gay, i'm a lesbian. Really shut the hell up, we don't care!!
I just have to say that I absolutely love this. For the past two years I have struggled with coming to terms with what I'm realizing is my true bisexuality, and I think this is a beautiful way to put it. Thank you so much.
My sister and I both identify as bisexual. While I know my parents would be supportive if I were a lesbian, I haven't come out to them because when my sister did my mother told her that experimenting with female friends didn't make her bisexual, even using that infuriating old standby “just a phase”. It's so frustrating to have to fear not being believed even by such otherwise accepting people. Someday I hope to be able to say I'm bisexual to someone other than my best friends (or people online whom I've never met) without being afraid that everyone around me thinks I'm just putting it on.
The whole issue of people's doubt that bisexuality exists has contributed to making it extremely hard even for me to figure out my sexual identity. I know that I'm attracted to both men and women, I know that I've had romantic feelings for both – and yet there's always a voice in my head whispering that maybe they're all right and I am just kidding myself one way or another. It's a struggle every day.
When a man says he's bisexual, people think he's gay and in denial. When a woman says it, people think she's straight, a slut and out for attention. (I have no problem with straight people experimenting with others of the same sex, or vice versa, by the way – that is their choice just as much as my expression of my sexuality is mine.) But sometimes I'm tempted to wish I were just gay, because then at least people might believe me. (One of the most touching things for me has been having gay, transgender and genderqueer friends who've accepted me for who I am and whom I love, because it's true that biphobia exists in the LGBTQQIA community as much as it does in the straight.)
I wouldn't give it up, though, however hard it's been. As Lady Satan said, “we are gifted with the ability to see beauty in and share love with both women and men.”
I haven't yet been able to say that I'm a proud bisexual woman – but I'm getting there.
I've
Oh, and if you're all TLDR about this… no hard feelings.
Vanessa who? Oh, justy another publicity seeking homo wannabe? Ok.
I'm bisexual to someone other than my best friends (or people online that I've never met) without fear that everyone around me think I just put it on.
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I just don't understand why everyone that is gay or bisexual is so “proud” of it. I mean, good for you for being whatever you are or feel like being, but what's pride got anything to do with it? I don't get it… Should I be a proud heterosexual woman?
If she's so “proud” why did it take her so long to “come out”? Silly liberals.
Vanessa Carlton hasn't been relevant for years. When someone 'comes out' and it really turns out that they're only bi, its like, whatever, who cares, pretty much 90% of girls at my college call themselves 'bi'… at least until graduation…
i keep hearing from biseuxals that they have a preference or can only see themselves in a committed relationship with one of the sexes. to me, that sounds like they are just horny when it comes to one.
i accidentally liked this comment, but really meant to just reply to it, and now i can't unlike it. anyway, they are proud because there has been so much hate and discrimination towards them, so they NEED to show their pride.
You are right on the money, Lady Satan! I'm constantely told that I need to “pick a side” and that I'm just “confused”. I'm am neither! I love both the male AND the female bodies, and the souls behind them. I am bisexual, and that means I like BOTH genders.
I have never come across more rejection or discrimination from the gay community in my life. My straight friends are more accepting!
You'd think they'd embrace bisexuals, but they act as if we're dirt or something! Hey, just because all of a sudden people are accepting you, doesn't mean you can just act all discriminating against bi's!
I am proud to be a bisexual women, and to hell with all you haters!
Thumbs up to this site for pointing out the reality of the situation. Anyone familiar with Vanessa Carlton’s nature will know that this is not a publicity stunt, just something she shared with fans at a pride festival.
I’m not proud of having blue eyes, brown hair, or any other incidental traits of myself, but I am most definitely NOT ASHAMED to be bisexual.
@BBBBB: maybe she’s not relevant to you. But her music is incredibly relevant to me.
Vanessa Carlton’s never been relevant. Not even after she tells the world she is bisexual! It doesn’t matter.