Today's Evil Beet Gossip

What the Hell is With Tiger’s New Nike Commercial?

The execs at Nike thought that it'd be a good commercial concept to channel Tiger's dead father. Tiger's dad, who passed away in 2006, was resurrected via Hollywood magic in order to give the fallen golf-star a stern talking-to regarding his multiple indiscretions. What do you guys think, pretty artistic or just ... kinda creepy? /> The execs at Nike thought that it'd be a good commercial concept to channel Tiger's dead father. Tiger's dad, who passed away in 2006, was resurrected via Hollywood magic in order to give the fallen golf-star a stern talking-to regarding his multiple indiscretions. What do you guys think, pretty artistic or just ... kinda creepy? ...

Jon Gosselin Filing For Primary Custody of the Kids That He Hasn’t Seen in Four Years

Okay, okay ... four years is an obvious exaggeration, but you get it. Word on the street is that Jon Gosselin's blown all of his TLC-borne money on cigarettes, Hostess Twinkies and skiing trips with nineteen year-old snow bunnies, so now he's looking to gain primary custody of his children so that Kate, the estranged wife, has to pay him child support. Damn, what an upstanding young man. Gosselin, who's been away from his kids for weeks at a time without seeing them, claims that Kate is an...

Does She Always Have to Be Stuffing Her Face?

I feel like every time I see new candid photos of the pop star, she's slamming back soda, chips or ice cream.  Not that I care what she decides to pollute her diet with, but damn ... I'm wicked jealous that it's apparently not damaging her newly-svelte figure.   New drinking game:  I think every time we see a new photo released where Britney's eating some kind of junky crap, we should drink a case of Heineken.  To the head.  Really.  We'll just be drunk, for like, ever. After giving ...

Jennifer Lopez Poses For Grandma’s Favorite Bathroom Magazine

Yep, the very same Redbook. At least, that was my Nana's favorite magazine before she died at the ripe old age of 89. J. Lo has clearly fallen quite far from her days of gracing Elle and Glamour and Rolling Stone, but I think she still looks fabulous and she's still one of the most beautiful women on the planet in my eyes. Redbook's sales might actually take a big hike up this edition, 'cause girlfriend's looking just smoking hot. In an interview with the geriatric orthopedist-office m...

The Sarah Jessica Parker Who’s Not Dead Totes Her Kids Around NYC

Although reports on April 1st emerged regarding Sarah Jessica Parker and the Grim Reaper, she was photographed earlier today looking alive and well not awful taking her eldest son, James Wilkie, to school. One of her baby twin daughters was pictured strapped to the Sex and the City star's chest. James Wilkie looks like a really young, modern-day Ferris Bueller ... but I guess that's what you get when he's your dad. (Yes, Matthew Broderick, despite the fact that you claimed to move onto "...

Quotables

“I can be mean. I can cave in to gossip. I can ice people out and I can definitely harbour revenge. In fact, I’m having a situation right now with a friend where I’m feeling pretty angry. But revenge is corrosive and it doesn’t make me feel good. I’ll wake up in the morning and think, ‘Ugh, I feel terrible’, and suddenly realize, ‘Ah, that’s why. I’m holding on to so much hate.” --Gwyneth Paltrow gives us an inside look at the ice-chip-nipple queen herself in an intervi...

Have You Perfected Your Greasy Fist-Pump Yet?

Better get on that shit, like, stat. Jersey Shore's intent on having more tools than your neighborhood hardware store ... and their ploy is a clever one. The MTV producers responsible for trainwreck-dessert-show Jersey Shore are looking for the latest and greatest guidos and guidettes to take the shore by storm.  Insiders say that they're looking to find the perfect roommates for the already-existing bunch of tools known as the cast of the Jersey Shore for this year's filming season. ...

Jennifer Love Hewitt Doesn’t Seek Out Players

But with the exception of Jamie Kennedy, that's all the poor girl ends up with. JLH speaks recently to Ryan Seacrest about the trials and tribulations of being ... le sigh ... Jennifer Love Hewitt. Evidently, girlfriend's been cheated on -- alot: "It's brutal. Once I found out on television and that was awesome. And then another time I found them together ... and that was, woooo!" Hewitt states that she once actually caught an ex in a rather provocative position and says about it, "That was not...

Michael Lohan Is Marrying Jon Gosselin’s Sloppy Seconds

Ohhhh, you guys, gossip doesn't get much better than this. Michael Lohan is engaged to Kate Major. If that name sounds familiar, it's because you've heard it before. Kate Major is the former Star reporter who had to quit her job after striking up a romantic relationship with Jon Gosselin. She'd be friends with Michael Lohan for awhile at that point -- because what kind of Star reporter are you if you're not buddy-buddy with Michael Lohan? -- and I'm pretty sure she's the reason Michael and Jon ...

MY GOD NO!!!

Super-amazing-adorable power-couple Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy have called it quits on their five-year union. My first reaction to the news was, "What? Fuck, this is way late for an April Fools' gag and it's not even all that chuckalicious to begin with" and then I saw that both parties Tweeted the news. I've found out the hard way, if it's on Twitter, it's gotta be true: Carrey's Twitter: Jenny and I have just ended our 5yr relationship. I'm grateful 4 the many blessings we've share...

I Don’t Follow Dancing With the Stars, But Damn is This Shit Funny.

So, Kate Gosselin danced to Lady Gaga's "Paparazzi" on the latest Dancing With the Stars (and damn, sorry, I must have missed the memo on Gosselin being a "star" somewhere along the line). If you missed the performance, I've taken the liberty to verbally reenact it for you: Kate stumped clumsily around the floor looking pissed and constipated and in the words of the judges, the entire presentation was ... "odd." Enough said. Granted, the woman can dance a shade better than I can ever claim to -- and if you know me in person, you'll ...

Sandra Bullock Breaks Her Silence

... Over probably the most important part of this entire affair ordeal. Bullock speaks exclusively to People magazine -- like, today -- regarding the up-and-coming rumors that she starred alongside estranged husband, Jesse James, in a homemade sex tape: "There is no sex tape ... There never has been one and there never will be one." While it's rumored that James' sex-tally is up to twelve mistresses (And what the fuck is wrong with people nowadays, really ... One is bad, but fucking twelve?!), some women are now coming forward to claim that there's a long history of sex-tape filled escapades featuring the man, the myth, Jesse "Adolph" James. I think it's super-classy that Bu...
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