Today's Evil Beet Gossip

You’d Think 22 Grand Would Mean More to an Unemployed Drug Addict

Lindsay Lohan was all smiles at LAX yesterday despite having just been issued a fine for 22-thousand dollars by an airline just a few days earlier. See, Lindsay was supposed to be some 77 year old millionaire's date to the Vienna Opera Ball but she ran two hours late to the airport because she was too busy shopping. The airline held the plane for her, which I didn't even know was legal, but slapped her with the hefty fine. Lindz wound up canceling on her geriatric John because she's classy li...

Holly Robinson Peete is Disgusted and Offended By John Mayer

Earlier this week a truly epic Playboy interview with John Mayer was released and it caused quite the public reaction. Between John spilling details on his relationships with Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston and his use of the most hated racial slur ever, not too many folks walked away from reading it unoffended. Especially upset about some of John's remarks is actress Holly Robinson Peete, who sat down with People to discuss what was said about her. Q: Would you have been so flattered by ...

Supposedly Tiger Woods Sucks at Rehab

Even though it's been reported widely that Tiger Woods is desperate to make it work with Elin after being caught in a cheating scandal, the National Enquirer has a different story. Of course. According to their new cover, Tiger not only cheated on his wife again while in rehab, but he refused to admit he had a problem. A source with inside scoop from the rehab center gave the Enquirer the following scoop: "I am NOT a sex addict!" A hostile Tiger Woods exploded with pent-up rage during sex a...

Khloe Kardashian is My Favorite Person

First of all, I just want to apologize for pulling these screen grabs from that mentally-ill hamface, but I didn't have a choice and you need to see this. OK! So, I pretty much think that Khloe Kardashian is one of the best people on the planet. The girl's completely unhinged and hilarious and everything I look for in the kind of person I want to pay attention to. For examps, check out what she did to her weenie brother Rob's Twitter page last night. It's so blatantly immature and ridiculous that you can't kind help but love the gr...

Jamie Lynn Spears Can Keep a Child Alive

There was a lot of speculation about Jamie Lynn Spears' ability to parent when the news first broke that she was pregnant. Not only was she a young teen, but she was Britney Spears' sister. Neither of those things exactly scream "parent potential". However, I am pleased to report after seeing these photos that Jamie Lynn has managed to keep her daughter Maddie alive. And they both look good! It seems like Jamie Lynn has adjusted well to life as a semi-normal Southern girl. [gallery]...

Shut Up, Carnie Wilson

Carnie Wilson is in the news again because she's unhappy with her weight. Although Carnie had gastric bypass surgery ten years ago, her weight is back up to 212 pounds. She's convinced that she's gotten so far off of her diet that she's now in need of professional intervention once again. Carnie gained a total of 131 pounds during her two pregnancies over the last four years, and she contributes a lot of her struggle to not being able to shed that weight. I swear to God I've been listening to Ca...

It’s Fashion Week Again

Yep. It's that time of the year yet again. The stars didn't come out for the first day like we'd hope, but lots and lots of C-list types made it out to the tents. Here's a question for you guys: Is something about the clothes in all of these photos very "1992" to you? I feel like that's where we're at, fashion wise. 1992. The colors, the cuts of the jackets. Half of these women look like they're wearing updated versions of costumes from Lifetime Original movies. [gallery]...

In Other News …

Maybe-probably Josh Duhamel did have an affair with that stripper-girl last year, 'cause now she's crying 'love child'. [Celebslam] Alice in Wonderland comes to theaters March 5th ... And I won't be able to see it on IMAX because my area sucks. [popbytes] Russell Brand still wearing weird clothes, still doing weird things in new movies.  [Pajiba] Why would Gerard "Gerry" Butler want Jennifer Aniston when he can have ... HOOKERS!? [Celebitchy] How much do you spend on clothing and accessories in a month's time?  [Zelda Lily] Check out Lady Gaga's "Snow Miser" look.  [LitelySalted] Khloe Kardashian threatens to ruin the eyes of all the world by making a solo sex tape.  [Allie Is Wired] Hey, Alba: 1992's calling you and they want their look back.  [Amy Grindhouse] />Maybe-probably Josh Duhamel did have an affair with that stripper-girl last year, 'cause now she's crying 'love child'. [Celebslam] Alice in Wonderland comes to theaters March 5th ... And I won't be able to see it on IMAX because my area sucks. [popbytes] Russell Brand still wearing weird clothes, still doing weird things in new movies.  [Pajiba] Why would Gerard "Gerry" Butler want Jennifer Aniston when he can have ... HOOKERS!? [Celebitchy] How much do you spend on clothing and accessori...

Is Katy Perry Pregnant?

I thought her engagement to Russell Brand happened just a wee bit too fast. When I heard the news, I was all like, "She's preggers. Totally preggers." And I think I see a hint of a baby bump in these latest pics of Katy leaving her gym in LA. The rest of her body is still super tiny, but there's a little bulge in the tummy area that I'm pretty sure wasn't there before. What do you guys think? Speeeaking of Katy/ies and moving a little fast in relationships, I'm putting in a quick plug for ...

The Insider Is Still Doing This Lindsay Lohan Celebrity Hoarder Thing

This really happened. Lindsay Lohan let Niecy Nash and a crew from The Insider come into her trainwreck of a house -- with a camera crew -- and organize it. This is part four of Lord only knows how many parts, because we are going to drag this thing on forever. I think it's hilarious that Lindsay wouldn't let the camera crews into her bedroom until it was organized. I wonder how many drawers of coke mirrors we're not getting to see here. Really, Lindsay? This is what someone like Kim Kardashian does to get attention. This should not be what you do to get attention. You drink and make terrible movies to get attention. Let's get back to that, because life is boring without you loose on the streets. Parts 3, 2 and 1 of this absolute insanity are after the jump. Read More /> This really happened. Lindsay Lohan let Niecy Nash and a crew from The Insider come into her trainwreck of a house -- with a camera crew -- and organize it. This is part four of Lord only knows how many parts, because we are going to drag this thing on forever. I think it's hilarious that Lindsay wouldn't let the camera crews into her bedroom until it was organized. I wonder how many drawers of coke mirrors we're not getting to see here. Really, Lindsay? This is what someone like Kim Kardashian d...

Jessica Simpson Is Not as Happy to Be Called “Sexual Napalm” as I Would Be

It's been an awesome couple of days for Jessica Simpson, who recently had her vagina's addictiveness flouted in a Playboy article by John Mayer. He called her "sexual napalm." The exact quote: “That girl, for me, is a drug. And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them … Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me… Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm ... There are people in the world who have the power to change our values. Have you ever been with a girl who made you want to quit the rest of your life? Did you ever say, “I want to quit my life and just fuckin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to fuck you, I would start selling all my shit just to keep fucking you.” Yesterday, Jessica tweeted:
interesting day so far...hmm...at least i am boxing 2-a-days this week
And then when TMZ asked her if she had a comment (video above), she bitterly laughed it off and said she didn't. Ummmmm, okay, look, if some guy gave that interview to Playboy about me, I would be thrilled. I would be beyond delighted. I would get a T-shirt made that said "I AM SEXUAL NAPALM" and then I would wear it everywhere. When people asked me what my name is, I would be all like "Well, Playboy just calls me 'Sexual Napalm.' So that's kind of what I go by these days. Did I mention John Mayer would sell all his shit to keep fucking me? Because, yeah. Dudes want to snort me, that's how good I am in bed." You need to own this, Jessica. /> It's been an awesome couple of days for Jessica Simpson, who recently had her vagina's addictiveness flouted in a Playboy article by John Mayer. He called her "sexual napalm." The exact quote: “That girl, for me, is a drug. And drugs aren’t good for you if you do lots of them … Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me… Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm ... There are people in the world who have the power to change our values. Have you ever been with a girl who made you wan...