I am a terrible Jew. On Saturday, I learned it was Purim by reading Twitter. So I felt bad. I did go to an improv comedy show that night, which is a reasonably Jewish thing to do, I suppose, but then I felt even worse to learn that Jersey Shore‘s Snooki actually attended a Purim event, along with castmate Vinny, at Manhattan hotspot Solo. I’m sure she was there because the Jewish traditions are close to her heart, and not at all because the Jewish owners of a Manhattan nightclub shelled out a shitload of money to have reality TV stars at their event.
Anyway. The freakin’ glass roof of the venue collapsed. Snooki did, of course, what everyone reasonable does in a crisis situation these days: she tweeted about it. “Its okay Vin and I are still alive. Omg roof just collapsed at the purim event! We thought the dj was beatin the beat hardcore but nope,the roof couldn’t handle snooki and vin.”
Vinny had a more reasonable explanation on his Twitter: “Roof just collapsed at Purim event…. I think me and @sn00ki felt the wrath for not being Jewish”.
My guess is that Snooki’s hair kept bumping up against the glass until it caved. Note to American Jews: Italian-American girls now have even bigger hair than we do. Although we still win in the tit department. AND THAT’S WHERE IT MATTERS.
Oh my goodness, I’m an even worse Jew than you are. I didn’t realize yesterday was Purim until reading your post! Ack!
You were probably too busy watching the Olympics!
And if you didn’t, US won the hockey game against Canada ;)
HA!
The tit department! Too funny.
I learn about most holidays when people post well wishings during them on facebook. oh well, I’m already going to hell anyway….
Purim is the best Jewish holiday ever. I’m a total goy and even I knew it was Purim!
Three cheers for the ‘Beat Teats”: HOORAY,HOORAY,HOORAY
you also win in the nose department
Touche.
Noseist, bastard. Wait till Grace reads what your wrote.
In New York, the main difference between Italians and Jews is that for Jews, pork is against their religion, and for Italians, pork is a religion. We have whole stores devoted to it.
OOMPA LOOMPA DOOMPADEE DOO
I’VE GOT A PERFECT PUZZLE FOR YOU
WHY IN THE HELL IS SNOOKIE ORANGE TOO??
not one new post all frickin’ day!
Praise Busey you came back Beet! This website has been taken over by angst and bitterness. Glad you’re back, albeit not nearly enough. Is it too much to ask to stop by more often? No, no, it’s fine. I know you’ve got more important things to do. I’ll just sit here and stick my head in the over.
….there. Was that enough Jewish guilt for you?
Ok seriously who the hell is this bitch?