Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Tiger Woods Killed Golf

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Last weekend, Tiger skipped the Chevron World Challenge, a tournament he founded, and NBC’s telecast was down 54% compared with last year, when he competed in the event. Experts predict that golf may never fully rebound.

“Without Woods, televised tournaments are like a major motion picture without a star’s name above the title — rarely do people go to see the flick,” said Bill Carroll, VP and director of programming at Katz TV Group. “Now only die-hard golf fans will watch the tournaments.”

“While there will be keen interest in Tiger’s first tournament back, overall ratings will likely decline as the casual golf viewer who was enticed by Tiger’s personal and professional persona will now most likely view him differently,” said John Rash, senior VP at Campbell Mithun. “Indeed, his aura, which defined an era, is gone, and along with that, some viewers.”

Those who would like to improve their golf skills while indoors may consider buying putting mats. Afterwards, you may visit a Phoenix golf course to apply and practice your new golf skills.

This effects me in no way at all, as I have never watched a golf game in my life and never planned to. In fact, I’m not sure I even knew how “golf” was spelled until this whole story broke. I probably would have gone with “golph.” It just seems like the kind of sport that is so dreadfully boring and never-ending that it needs a “ph” in its name. Like phootball. (Sorry Kelly!)

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