Today's Evil Beet Gossip

T.I. Sentenced to 366 Days in Prison

ti As expected, rapper T.I. was sentenced today to a year and a day in prison as part of his plea deal with prosecutors over a 2007 felony weapons charge. "Today I would like to say thank-you to some, and apologize to all," the rapper said. "Everything I learned was through trial and error. I've learned lessons in my life to put in my music so people won't make the same mistakes as I." The 28-year-old rapper, whose real name is Clifford Harris Jr., is required to voluntarily turn himself...

Beyonce Does Her Very Best Alanis

Beyonce brought a little Alanis flavor to the opening night of her tour in Edmonton, Canada, doing a cover of "You Oughtta Know." (Alanis, you'll recall, is a Canada girl, so that may have been why she chose this song.) I hate to sound like Paula Abdul here, but she didn't really make it her own. It played like an exact copy of Alanis's version. Also, seriously, how 10 years ago is it to encourage the audience to sing the "fuck her" part of that song? I mean, really. Come on, B. I expect more from you. /> Beyonce brought a little Alanis flavor to the opening night of her tour in Edmonton, Canada, doing a cover of "You Oughtta Know." (Alanis, you'll recall, is a Canada girl, so that may have been why she chose this song.) I hate to sound like Paula Abdul here, but she didn't really make it her own. It played like an exact copy of Alanis's version. Also, seriously, how 10 years ago is it to encourage the audience to sing the "fuck her" part of that song? I mean, really. Come on, B. I expect...

Quotables

method_man “Myself, I’m a pothead. It’s no secret. Everyone knows that. I go on the road and forget everything else. Sure, [the tax department] sent letters to my house saying, ‘We need this money.’ They started sending them in 2002. Here it is, 2009, and I never paid this s— because I don’t think like that! I could have easily just written them a check for whatever amount, but no — I waited until they knocked on this door and were like, ‘We got your truck and we outta here.' Now I’m t...

Ashlee Simpson And Pete Wentz Are In Love And You’re Going To Witness Their Love Whether You Want To Or Not

57058799ashleesimpson327200910212pm-1 Why is it that whenever "troubled marriage" rumors start floating around, celeb couples feel the need to respond by making out in public?  Because if there is one couple that I never need to see having a tongue wrestling match, it's Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz.  Seeing these pictures gave me a very severe Michael Jackson/Lisa-Marie Presley moment and I don't appreciate it. The two nauseated me joined onstage at the MTV Australia awards and sent the unmistakable message:  We.  Are.  H...

New Kellie Pickler and Taylor Swift Video

The virtually unrecognizable Kellie Pickler has a new video out for her song Best Days Of Your Life.  The video features Beet's fave, Taylor Swift, who you just know was thinking about her lost Jonas the whole time they filmed this. I could totally see this crossing over to Top 40 music which is a good thing.  I've been struggling lately because I can't stand country music, but I find myself liking it and sometimes even seeking it.  This cannot be happening....

Michael Lohan Plans to Get All Jamie Spears On Lindsay’s Ass

57011015lindsaylohan3272009115212am-1 Michael Lohan is at it again-more talk about his daughter Lindsay and how he is going to be the one to save her.  Remember that promise he made to keep their private family business out of the media?  Yeah, he doesn't either. Lindsay Lohan could end up even worse off than Britney Spears, the troubled actress’ father has said. Former Wall Street trader Michael Lohan says the Mean Girls star is spiraling into a personal disaster even worse than that of the Toxic hitmaker - and is now pleading with his famous daughter to see sense before it is too late and split from her lesbian partner Sam...

R.I.P.

blender Another great magazine bites the dust.  Blender closed up shop this week after ten years of print. The magazine was owned by nut job Felix Dennis until 2007 when he sold Blender and Maxim to Alpha Media for the tidy sum of $250M.  Nice timing!  Incidentally, some of the highlights of Felix's career and life:  jailed for corrupting children, the first person to say "cunt" live on British television, confessed to killing a man and then later retracted blaming the booze. Subscription nu...

Top Chef’s Padma Lakshmi Does Meat Porn

There is something about an Indian woman orally fucking a burger that seems wholly improper to me.  But Top Chef's Padma Lakshmi, the one who was raised vegetarian, is the newest celeb to toss out her self-respect for a Carl's Jr. ad campaign. Especially enjoyable is the skirt hike at about :14 (is that Spanx?), coupled with, "It reminds me of being in high school," and a close up of Padma licking her arm like it's an over-sized phallus.  I guess we know who the most popular girl at Lakshmi's s...

Richard Hatch Wants Outta Prison

richard Ohhhh, that crazy Richard Hatch. Remember him? He's the dude who won the first Survivor, then went to jail because he didn't pay the taxes on his winnings. And then he said he didn't pay the taxes because he'd caught CBS producers sneaking food to some of the other contestants, and in order to keep him quiet, they offered to pay his income taxes if he won. And then they, of course, didn't. It's all such insanity. So Rich is in jail, and now he wants out. Hatch, who is representing himself, fi...

Bitch, Please

jerrybeyonce So I've been listening to old England Dan songs, downing bottles of Two Buck Chuck and cruising around the internet when I came across this bullshit.  And I had to share. Remember this dress which made Beyonce look like her jelly factory exploded?  Well, ages after the fact, her rep has released a statement because she's under some impression we care:  "This is not a weight-gain issue.  Beyonce is in the best shape of her life. The exaggerated hips are a design element of a truly couture dress. Beyonce has always loved this dress."  Yeah, whateve...

If You’re Under Thirty-Three, Just Humor Me. R.I.P.

Dan Seals, the England Dan half of England Dan and John Ford Coley, passed away from complications of lymphoma last night.  He was only sixty-one years old. Two of the bands biggest hits were, I'd Really Like To See You Tonight and Nights Are Forever. Sigh.  Times have changed so much since 1976.  When I'd Really Like To See You Tonight was originally released, radio stations insisted on a re-recorded version in which the scandalous line "I'm not talking 'bout movin' in," was changed to "I'm not talking 'bout a millenium." Spark up a ...

What’s It All About, Alfie?

snn1305aa-380_732314a I'm not sure what it's all about, but it isn't about fatherhood for Alfie Patten. You may remember that Afie was being called the youngest father in Britain at one point.  Well, the DNA results are back-I totally feel like Maury Povich right now.  Thankfully, he is not a thirteen year-old dad.  I feel bad for this baby, though. The Mirror reports: The result will be a blow to Alfie who was "devastated" by the boys' claims and "adored" Maisie.He was convinced he was the dad after a si...
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