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Phelpsy Might Be Prosecuted for His Weed-Smoking!

February 3, 2009
Evil Beet
Michael Phelps
27 Comments

phelps_bong

Oh noes!

Even though his gazillion sponsors don’t seem to care that Michael “Size Fourteen” Phelps admitted to taking giant bong rips at a party in South Carolina this fall, the South Carolina authorities may not let him get off that easy.

South Carolina authorities in the county where Michael Phelps was spotted smoking from a marijuana pipe say they are considering a criminal charge against the Olympic superstar.

Lt. Chris Cowan said Tuesday that Richland County sheriff’s investigators are gathering more information about the photo, which showed the swimmer inhaling from a marijuana pipe.

Cowan did not specify what charge was being considered and declined to discuss details of the investigation.

Hey, Phelpsy?

You know who’ll let you get off easy?

Me.

In bed.

And that is all I have to say about this matter.

Thanks Lacy!

27 CommentsLeave a comment

  • no they’re not! they can’t. it’s just a picture of him smoking weed, not him possessing it or doing it in front of an undercover cop. that’s lame.

  • Oh for shit’s sake!!! This is ri-damn-dic-ulas!!!

    Also I just havta say when ever I read sexual stuff that you write all I can think of is that your Grandpa is reading it too :-)

  • Dude thats a major infringement on his rights! The marijuana laws are already ridiculous as is. IF this actually is valid than that means they will be able to prosecute ANYONE for smoking based on photographic evidence. Hide your facebooks.

  • This country wastes SO much money on enforcing marijuana laws. Studies show again and again that marijuana is less harmful than both alcohol and cigarettes. What a waste of time and money to prosecute him. They can’t prove that he’s smoking pot out of that anyway. It could very well be tobacco except the idiot admitted to smoking pot. He should’ve said “I smoke pot. So does a lot of other Americans, and American athletes.” And I learned this on the new the other day: 60% of Americans are enabling the marijuana drug market in one way or another.

  • WE MUST ALL TAKE BONG HITS IN PROTEST!
    LMAO! obviously! Obviously im LMAO because thats just how i roll…. a joint.

  • This is stupid. Imagine if they had access to the pictures on Facebook. Half the people on there would be getting charged as well.

    Stoopid stoopid stoopid. ~rolls eyes~

  • “…gathering more information about the photo.” Like what? Was the bong water fresh? Did Phelps meet up with a mysterious guy in a park to buy a bag of green? Was it more of a Bob Marley or a Snoop Dogg kind of party crowd? Were any animals harmed in the taking of the photo? What’s on the TV screen in the background? What’s in the cup? Did he consort with any of our southern belles? Where did he get that sweet watch? Why South Carolina? Will Chief Wiggum need backup?

    As Phelps’ council, I must say that all they have of him is a grainy photo of a guy holding what is perhaps a peculiar looking telescope. There’s no smoke and there’s no fire. And Phelps’ ‘confession’ was essentially a mea cupla with few damaging details.

    • That’s exactly what I thought. I don’t get why he didn’t just deny it anyway. It’s a horrible picture. It could be anyone. Also how is this hayseed Barney Pfeiff going to prove that this happened in his jurisdiction? It’s a photograph. He’s not parked at the local 7/11 lighting up with his license plate displayed to the Big Brother satellite!!!!

  • I’m pretty sure sleeping with Michael Phelps could get you prosecuted too. I mean, having sex with horses is most definitely illegal and even if his face/giant deformed head is only half horse (the other half being goblin), I wouldn’t risk it.
    Maybe you should consider just putting a saddle on him and having him pull you and your family around in a covered wagon.

  • If they get him for anything, it’s the confession not the photo. And he can retract it. So I hope he does.
    Pot laws in the US are just plain retarded.

  • how do they know it’s weed? I mean, duh, but bongs and pipes are sold for “tobacco” use. How do they even know what he’s smoking. If anything, only the confession would be of any use in a trial.

    Which is plain stupid. What a waste of time and money to prosecute anyone for smoking pot.

    • That is true. No way they can prove what he is smoking. When will these younguns learn to NOT let people take pictures- This has cost him millions in lost endorsements

  • Once again, in the words of the great Bugs Bunny “what a maroon.” Only a fool would confess to the world “Hey that guy with his face half covered up is, in fact, me smoking an illegal substance in South Carolina. I just wanted to make sure you all know it was really, really me, and not some guy who can pass for me.”

    • I have a feeling that MP’s 15 minutes are fading and he really, really liked them. Unlike Miss Beet, I don’t think he’s so very hot. If he weren’t a gold medal Olympian he would definitely need a masters in great line of sh-t to get any.

  • so does this mean that the authorities will now start scouring the net for any and all pics of anyone smoking a joint or hitting a bong? This is totally lame… I guess i’d better take the pics down of me smoking out of a bong created out of a beer hat… and how pissed is Phelps for letting some asshole take his pic while doing that then selling it… duh!

  • You know the jails can’t accommodate every weed smoker in the U.S. We could stage a smokeathon. What could they do. Everybody congregate in you local grocery store parking lots and light up in public.