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If Ever There Was A Time That Birth Control Needs To Have A 100% Efficacy Rate, This Would Be It

January 27, 2009
Wendie
Evan Rachel Wood, Mickey Rourke, Uncategorized
75 Comments

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Yes, Mickey Rourke is fucking his movie daughter, Evan Rachel Wood.  The two met on the set of The Wrestler and obviously hit it off.  Naked.  Sweet Jesus, Wood is obviously into really weird and unattractive men.  Homely dudes are the best in bed; it’s an overcompensation thing.  Unfortunately, since I got LASIK, taking out my contacts to get through ugly sex is no longer an option.

Despite all the denials, on the night of the SAG Awards they were making out at after-parties and went up to his room at the Four Seasons.  I guess that isn’t solid proof of sex; maybe they were up there being just friends and eating overpriced cashews.  Who am I kidding?  They are so having sex.  This picture says it all, doesn’t it?

75 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Mickey Rourke isn’t homely! God God! He’s just a tad fucked up from bad plastic surgery and also several years of ‘finding himself’ in the boxing ring.
    Don’t you remember him from Angel Heart? 91/2 weeks? He was one of the sexiest actors in the ’80’s.
    I’d still fuck him. Even now. Even with the yellow hair!

    • THANK YOU! My god I don’t get why people are on this guy so much. Ok so he looks a little rough, but give the man a chance. If you hear this guy talk, he’s just seems like the nicest, most humble guy. And he’s talented. And I really don’t think he’s THAT bad looking.. the fact that he seems really down to earth definitely makes me have to join the “I’d totally fuck Mickey Rourke Club.”

    • Those comments apply to those of us who are able to remember him in the 80’s! She, on the other hand, is far too young to be appreciative of what he looked like 25 yrs ago. SICK SICK SICK.

      How long til we find out she was abused as a toddler…or have we already? I don’t follow her “career” too closely.

  • Re uglydude sex being good: Does the rule apply to dudes who were hot at one point then became ugly? See I’m thinking if a guy were hot once then his piss poor narcissistic attitude could carry through even when he later becomes ugly. And see, Mickey there, well, he still seems pretty vain with all his facial pullings (yankings) and shiny suits and homophobic rantings and all that. So, contacts off or not, I’m betting boning Mickey is no fun. I’d also bet a million dollars he has a bad case of pinky dick. I’m pretty much psychic when it comes to weiner size. And the girl strikes me as the type whose self esteem is so low that she’s into “punish me because I’m not worth better” sex.

    • I don’t think that rule applies, cuz the guys tend to still think they are hot shit. Good call.

      another loophole is guys who grew up ugly/fat/yuckies but then got hot. those guys can be super good in bed too.

  • I loved the film, and I think Mickey is an interesting guy that seems to have come around. Wood also picks good films to be in. Props, to them. Does it really affect us? At least you’re more kind to them then Perez Hilton (yuck).

  • Hm…I’m suspecting some daddy issues. Especially since they’re denying the hell out of this. Neither one of them can be proud of this disgusting relationship because they’re hiding it.

  • I have nothing against the age difference – I prefer my men elderly too (something about wheezing and the shiny newness of a fresh oxygen tank)…

    However, I honestly think Micky Rourke is permanently relegated to young doe-eyed girls with compassion to spare. I mean seriously, who else is going to look past a mustache that is taped on f*cking sideways?

  • c´mon he is not as awful as you are writing;) i think that he is quite sexy in some weird way :) i mean there is something about him what makes him interesting and attractive :P

  • Yeah, he was hot, over 20 years ago. He is just vulgar now. I wouldn’t f*ck him with a gun to my head! That poor girl is drinking a big ol’ bowl of issue soup.

  • Oh, I went through an older-man phase. There are some girls who just can’t convince themselves it’s a bad idea until they go through it themselves. I did, and I had a lot of fun, but now I know.

  • She’s got all sorts of issues. Not the least being that she’s dating some old ass guy that looks like a post-op tranny (he’s a dead ringer for Felicity Huffman’s character in Transamerica!) and dresses like he’s trying out to be on Solid Gold.

    Nice to see he’s got the Tom Cruise possessive deathgrip mastered… maybe he should go check out Tommy’s new rules of engagement.

  • Yeah – it’s gross, I get that. But she’s free, white, and 21 (not to mention really pretty) so who can honestly blame him for going for it? Be honest guy’s!

      • It’s an old saying (at least where I come from) and in no way meant in an offensive way. Free – lives in America. 21 – is of age. White – yea, like I said, it’s a really OLD saying.

  • Her parents must be absolutely nauseated. First Manson, and now this? I agree with Kelsee and DownUnda, this girl has serious issues. There are reasons she chose two old freaks in a row.

  • Ew ew ew ew EW!!!

    EWWWWWWWWWW!

    Luckily I can take out my contacts…but I think the vision is still burned in my head.

  • he has a reputation of violent behavior towards women,
    I remember watching 9 1/2 weeks and finding him utterly artificial as a lover
    maybe he is better playing what he really is,
    anyway, he usually looks sloppy and dirty,
    so I bet he smells bad,
    and I don’t find him attractive at all,
    irrespective of his age.

  • Yeah he’s sweet…for a dad! I’m 23 and I could not imagine being romantically involved with such an old man. Not only that, but he’s fucking nasty, too.

  • I Think his best movie was “The Pope of Greenwich Village”, co-starring Eric Roberts.

    While he was certainly better looking (and friggin’ cleaner looking) in his youth, he ALWAYS HAD A FLABBY BUTT! I remember watching 9 1/2 weeks shortly after its release and thinking….FLABBY BUTT, FLABBY BUTT. Yup. That’s what I thought.

  • I don’t know why the hell anyone so young and attractive would date a guy that old and unattractive, but I guess if anyone would, Evan Rachel Wood.

    Hahaha. I crack myself up. Lame, I know.

    Um, maybe he’s a great guy… or something… eugh.

    • *up a. although a duck fucking a broach would still be a lot less gross and weird than mickey rourke fucking evan rachel wood.

  • I will be the first to admit that I’ve had lapses in judgement when it comes to men. Really. But this? Come on… I mean… I just… C’mon!!
    Why, sweetie? You could have your pick of Hollywood’s handsome, young bachelors, but you choose him?!?!?
    I can’t help be think of how awful things must be in this whole mess, as much as it gives me a headache reminiscent of an icepick between the eyes.

  • He is the male equivalent of the cat lady!!!!!!!!!! YUCK. I feel like I could pull and push his face and it would stay… like clay or silly putty.

  • yup, laura linney look alike is trying hard to be rita hayworth….kind of weird since rourke said he wished rita hayworth was still around in some interview recently…sad….course rourke is trying to be hank williams jr and that ain’t workin’ either…

    both are very desperate to be/stay famous, so i’m almost embarrassed/sorry for them…

    …but when i think about how many people rourke has shit on to get back in the game and i speak from direct experience…all i can say is his “aw shucks, i’m such a nice guy after all” routine is just him trying to be charming to get his career back! if you only knew…

    both are very hokey with their desperate attempt to seem cutting edge.

  • What the fuck is wrong with Evan Rachel Wood?! I’m not hating on Rourke or Manson, but a girl barely in her twenties clinging to middle-aged men seems to stem from deep-seated daddy issues.

    Makes me think her character in “Thirteen” was a prophecy of sorts.

  • Hallelujah there are other people besides me defending Mickey Rourke. He is one of my FAV actors and good god he was so fucking hot back in 9 1/2 weeks. And he is still sexy now. He has the kind of sexiness that comes within no matter what he looks like or how much plastic surgery he’s had. Take Sin City for instance. They totally uglify him to look like the character Marv from the comic book, and STILL he is fuckable. Same with the movie Domino. He’s got that “fuck you i’m fun” attitude and I would totally hit it. I was just telling my husband that I think it would be a blast to just go out and party with the old bastard one night. Like he would show me a thing or two and have me waking up upside down and ass naked. Thank you to all those here who understand the wonderfulness that is Mickey Rourke!

  • Yes Mickey Rourke was definitely hot in 9 1/2 Weeks. But today, not so much. Definitely would have to close my eyes and imagine it was still the 80s.

  • I don’t think they are doing each other….
    Mickey seems like a really nice person…who unfortunately met the doom of plastic surgery… he was really good looking back in the day.

    Maybe if he got a better stylist and hairdresser he may be able to look decent again. That whole shirt open, greased hair just makes him a billion times creepier.