Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Michael Phelps Has Found a Look That Works!

Oh thank GOD!

I have some mathematical truisms I would like to share with you guys. I do, after all, have a degree in engineering that my father keeps asking me why I’m not using. I AM GOING TO USE IT NOW. Check out my math skillz:

Sculpted beard + aviators = good

Michael Phelps

Sculpted beard – aviators = bad

mike-towel1

Trashy chick with Michael Phelps + large ocean + me = mysterious unsolved disappearance

mike_highfive1

56433843spasulka17200923418am

That is the end of today’s math lesson, kids. Stay tuned for tomorrow when we’ll discuss all the possible solutions to Lindsay Lohan + Grey Goose = x.

27 CommentsLeave a comment