Today's Evil Beet Gossip

LC on Letterman

David Letterman's just kind of making a cottage industry of making The Hills kids look like morons. I guess it's not that hard a job. Up now: Lauren Conrad. /> David Letterman's just kind of making a cottage industry of making The Hills kids look like morons. I guess it's not that hard a job. Up now: Lauren Conrad. ...

Mariah Carey: “I Stay in Love” Video

You know, I actually really like this song, but the showgirls-themed video is ruining it for me. And Mariah? When your hair extensions look more ridiculous than your showgirl head-dress, it's time for a change. /> You know, I actually really like this song, but the showgirls-themed video is ruining it for me. And Mariah? When your hair extensions look more ridiculous than your showgirl head-dress, it's time for a change. ...

Kendra Wilkinson Hates the New “Girls Next Door”

Hey, remember when Kendra first moved into the mansion and Holly was all like, "Fuck this stupid little bitch, wandering around like she owns the fucking place. This is my world. I built this."? Well, turnabout is fair play. Fast-forward in this vid to the Kendra interview, where she basically starts talking about what ungrateful little whores the new Hef girlfriends are, and then decides to stop herself when her publicist starts giving her dirty looks. You know what I cannot wait for? The Kendra Wilkinson tell-all. /> Hey, remember when Kendra first moved into the mansion and Holly was all like, "Fuck this stupid little bitch, wandering around like she owns the fucking place. This is my world. I built this."? Well, turnabout is fair play. Fast-forward in this vid to the Kendra interview, where she basically starts talking about what ungrateful little whores the new Hef girlfriends are, and then decides to stop herself when her publicist starts giving her dirty looks. You know what I cannot wait ...

This Is Too Good to Be True

Starpulse magazine -- the barometer of journalistic integrity -- is reporting that Paris Hilton has booked a seat on Sir Richard Branson's first Virgin spaceflight, scheduled for next year. Paris is reportedly a little apprehensive about the trip. "I'm very scared to do it," she says. "What if I don't come back? With the whole light-years thing, what if I come back 10,000 years later, and everyone I know is dead? I'll be like, 'Great. Now I have to start all over.'" This has to be bullshit, right? Even Paris Hilton wouldn't ju...

Quotables

As a result of the article titled “Blood Dispute” in the October 24th issue of Page Six, I am compelled to resign from my position as Freelance Journalist for Page Six Magazine. I did not, and would not, write such an article as the one to appear as my Page Six magazine column in this Sunday’s Post. To avoid hard feelings and break clean, I expect you to put my resignation, and my reason for it, in Page Six (newspaper) at the same time to coincide with the Sunday mag...

He Could Have Been Mine

My last chance at a blissful marriage just slipped through the cracks. Actually, that's probably a really bad metaphor in this case. The world's fattest man as of 2007, Mexican Manuel Uribe, has married his friend's widow in a televised ceremony the Discovery channel dubbed My Big Fat Mexican Wedding. Despite shedding 230 kilograms (570 pounds) from 590 kilograms early on this year, Uribe, 43, had to be carried by a crane on his bed, where he has been confined for years, to the makeshif...